Most women hoover above toilet seat in public toilets to pee?

Well no 😂 normal people just use the toilet. But if you DID get asked why you don’t sit on the toilet in the normal way ‘I’m irrationally terrified of toilets’ is a much more honest responses than ‘crabs are rife.’

Well be fair, we're piling on everyone who hovers. Partly because it is completely irrational but mostly because we are really tired of seeing piss sprayed everywhere from someone whose extensive hygiene and fear of germs and crabs doesn't seem to extend to not splattering urine all over the place.

I'm glad to see you're not really scared of catching crabs from a toilet seat. Please just wipe up after yourself. I know all hoverers swear they don't spray but at least some of you are wrong.

Yes and no. I genuinely hover, and I know it’s not rational, but people are just piling on me about it, so I figured I’d say crabs when someone asked me. Perhaps I should have said lobsters. You won’t catch crabs off a toilet seat but nothing is impossible. Never say never and all that.

someone asked me what I thought I’d catch by sitting on a public toilet. Crabs elicits a much better response than “nothing, I’m just irrational”.You mean you were just trolling?You're already being irrational by not using a toilet seat properly. Crabs made as much sense as anything else that other hoverers are so terrified of, especially when you start sharing dodgy links about it.

This is not a conversation I can imagine having with anyone outside here. 😁

I think you’re wrong. Saying ‘nothing, I’m just irrational/scared of toilets so I like to put toilet paper all over the place then just half crouch and try to pee on the toilet’ would elicit a better response because it’s honest. Saying ‘I’ll catch crabs if I use the toilet properly’ makes people think you simply don’t know that you’re irrational. And then the people are more likely to explain that you won’t catch crabs. If you just explained that you won’t use the toilet properly because of an irrational fear people would probably be more understanding.

Oh yeah, it's Mumsnet, isn't it.

You’re supposed to clean kitchen surfaces? That’s a new one on me

Yes, otherwise you get crabs.

Or lobsters, if you can afford them.

Just to clarify - I don’t have a kitchen sponge, or a specific kitchen cloth. I clean all my cutlery and dishes etc in the dishwasher, and use a cleaner/disinfectant on my surfaces, wiped off with some kitchen roll (Blitz not the cheap shit). If I’m doing any “serious” cleaning I’ll use a disposable jay cloth.

For the bathroom I’ll clean the toilet seat with my OH’s flannel or toothbrush.*
I rarely use public toilets, but if I have to then yes I’ll line the it with toilet paper and hover, but I always wipe the seat before and after. I appreciate this is incomprehensible to some people but I have public toilet ick, which I appreciate is not rational. I also know you’re not likely to catch anything off a toilet seat, but someone asked me what I thought I’d catch by sitting on a public toilet. Crabs elicits a much better response than “nothing, I’m just irrational”.

*that’s a joke btw

Yes, otherwise you get crabs.

You’re supposed to clean kitchen surfaces? That’s a new one on me

This.

Prtscn, you clean your kitchen surfaces with a dishwasher?

It's never a film of moisture though is it? If it IS it's probably splash-back when from the loo was flushed.

Why don't you just wipe the seat anyway? Takes 5 seconds.

The minute I saw the word 'Restroom' I knew this was a US site and it would be wrong.

The feature is written by a journalist and 'reviewed' by a dr, who clearly wasn't thinking properly that day.

If there was a louse on the seat, you'd see it.

A film of moisture, as opposed to droplets, is not always easy to see.

@PrtScn You can't catch crabs from toilet seats. They are like nits- they jump from head to head at most, or more often with close contact. They aren't waiting on the toilet seat for your bottom.

I thought these fairy tales about catching ''VD' as STIs were known had died out in the 1950s?

And yes, crabs are not STIs but you take the point.

😂😂😂

I take a mop and bucket, a bottle of bleach and a cloth

Maybe you need to go to Specsavers.
Wee on a seat is usually quite obvious, and if in doubt, get some tissue and wipe it.

What happens to me is I sit down on a seat that looks fine, only to find the backs of my thighs are soaking when I get up, because the filthy cow hoverer before me didn’t wipe the seat properly but just smeared the piss all over it.

They aren't fastidious, they're spraying everywhere, causing it to trickle down their legs and not emptying their bladders properly.

I have never understood women who are this fastidious. Wipe the seat with loo roll then sit on it.

Hoverers are being ridiculous.

This has actually restored my faith in womankind. I can't stand hoverers. I get terrible terrible mensrtrual cramps (adenomyosis) and have to sometimes run in to pass a huge clot... No I don't have time to look... Sitting on a seat soaked in someone else's piss is the absolute worst.. happened to me all the time in my old office where there was at least one AWFUL hoverer who left everything soaking. Like a man had been in there. Grim grim grim.

Sit on the toilet seat you weirdos it's literally what it's designed for. PLEASE.

Humans skin is home to millions of bacteria, fungi, and viruses. We are not sterile environments that must avoid all contact with the natural world, we are part of the natural world and teeming inside and out with microorganisms.

Catching crabs from using the toilet correctly was never ‘rife.’ You might as well scour the records and find a case where somebody was hovering over the toilet and lost their balance and fractured their skull and say ‘don’t hover, smashing your head in used to be rife.’