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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

‘He’s so bright but he just won’t work’

201 replies

WeightInLine · 19/05/2023 13:47

If he was ‘so bright’ then he’d know he needs to work to get results.

The ‘clever but won’t work’ thing is trotted about so many DC, but it’s self defeating. DC worry that if they did work hard but dont’t get Grade As, what then? So they don’t work, and keep the myth of their cleverness alive.

Meanwhile parents convince themselves their children are ‘very bright’ but [x excuse]. It all leads to poor mental health in teens as the myth and the outcome diverge.

AIBU?

OP posts:
XelaM · 13/09/2026 14:28

WhatNextImScared · 13/09/2026 12:45

I am this person. I guess I am naturally “bright” in that I managed to get AAB and A Level and a solid 2:1 degree without ever trying my hardest. I worked, but only as little as I needed to in order to get the outcome I desired. I could probably have got a first if I’d actually tried. It’s quite galling to realise that. My career has been solid enough but again - if I’d pushed harder I’d have had more opportunities. And now the exhaustion of perimenopause and midlife if making me even more lazy. My CBA attitude is getting worse. It early retirement was possible for me (it’s not) I’d go for it.
i currently have a primary age DC with SEND and she is soo lazy and hates being pushed. I worry about her endlessly.

Literally could have written this post. This is me exactly

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