To be upset about my sister being given a house by my parents

I think you're being hard done by with what your parents are planning to do buying gifting your sister a mortgage free house.

You both lived rent free at your parents house (she still does and doesn't pay any bills) So its not like there is a discrepancy there.

So they helped you out with some furniture and appliances that still isn't the same as gifting a mortgage free home.

I too would be pissed off. End of the day she will never have to worry if she lost her job and how she would pay a mortgage or face the stress of losing a home.

She can potentially if she was savvy, save hard and even retire early because she hasn't had a large chunk of her salary going towards paying the house.

Good luck trying to talk to your parents

Some of the comments on here are nuts. I think this is one of those situations you can only understand if it's happened to you. It's awful. Total favouritism and short sighted thinking by the ops parents. It's unfair that the op is penalised for having her shit together and getting a house. Yes you can buy a house in the North on that salary. OP if you do decide to talk to your parents good luck

It sounds to me like they are trying to give her the opportunity to move out (considering she has been complaining about it - I half expect they want to start their lives on their own now too) and see this as the way to do it.

What is she generally like with money? I found with me and my sibling as I was the eldest I was more resourceful whereas my younger sibling was not and needed more 'help'.

It could be a case that you are a victim of your own competence as your parents probably think you are 'ok'.

I also expect your parents haven't considered the unfairness element to you.

Just speak to them about how you feel.

I work in this field, you just add a load of unnecessary headache. The state funds the care packages and they will be entitled to benefits because of low assets. All what will happen is your DC will have to pay for the care out of their own funds. It's basically wasting money.

It's not hard to save 5/6 k a year on a teachers salary when living with parents rent free if ypu are sensible. And we don't all live in areas that are ££££ to buy

It's really unfair op, I'd be really upset in thos situation

Not sure why you are being given a hard time op, just because you were diligently saving a big chunk of your salary!

I too bought a house in early 20's although a long, long time ago, everyone assumed l had been gifted money but l never received a penny..l worked 80 hours a week in a tiny business l started, and spent not a penny except for running a very cheap old car...all my friends had cars on finance, holidays, nights out and new clothes.
In the north of Uk it is still very possible to buy a modest home, if you live at home rent free, and it is IMO very unfair that as your sister has the same opportunity as you to save whilst living rent free, she should be given a house.....
I would be very hurt in your shoes...
As a parent l would split the house proceeds evenly for both of you, or get your sister to take out a mortgage for exactly half the value of the house to pass to you.
That way she gets a home and you get a fair half.

I would talk calmly to your parents and say how you feel or it will sit between you.
Good luck.

I bought a house when I was 25 and earning £20K a year, some of these posts are just bizarre.
In your situation I would be very clear and tell DP that they can do what they please but that decisions have consequences and in this case it would be me resenting DS and them and a change in our relationship.

Similar situation here, my brother got given a larger percentage of my parents house. Eventually it was changed and was divided equally between us all but it's caused a rift. It's horrible when you think that your parents love one of their children more than you, story of my life right there.

Absolutely horrible thing to do. They should sell the house and give you half each. Perhaps you could have a word with them and tell them how grossly unfair they're being.

Your sister is being naive too if she can't understand why you'd feel annoyed and resentful.

Buying a house on a teacher's salary after saving for 5 years. Impressive.

Going through a similar situation.

I don’t see the logic behind your parents decision - you have a house with a mortgage, it’s not paid off. I imagine you will have many years, especially with the current climate paying this off too. So it’s an entirely different situation to just give your sister a house. What they should do is sell their house and split it - 50% to your sister for a down payment, and 50% to you to reduce your mortgage!

it may look bizarre from the outside. Maybe it is batshit. Maybe the parents have what are, to them at least - which is the important thing, reasons to do this.

If OP thinks it's unfair, she has canvassed opinions just in case she can't see the wood for the trees, she can directly ask the parents. She knows that on the face of it it looks unfair, and can calmly ask for clarification.

Then she can decide how she wants her relationship with her family to look.

She didn't need it to make a start on owning a home, she saved her deposit and now pays a mortgage, but she's going to be paying that off for decades.

They plan to give the other one a house, not only does she not need to save for a deposit but she will never have to pay a mortgage.

It's bizarre to want to gift one child a full house, while the other one has to pay a mortgage for decades.

well OP the only way to find out why your parents are, on the face of it, treating you unfairly is to ask them.

And if it turns out she's getting a whole house now - well you can decide how much to support your parents when they are old and infirm.

This makes perfect sense to me,we're in an almost identical situation with one of our children.

A 20 year old doesn't "need" to own a home free and clear. Good grief.

But did the 20 need it? At 20 the OP didn't have a house.

So many people are missing the point.
Every child should have the same support given to them by parents. As a parent I can’t imagine giving to one child and nothing to the other.
But they've helped the op out over the years, just not to the same degree because she didn't need it!

I can't believe that anyone wouldn't be upset if a sibling was gifted a mortgage free house by their parents, whilst they had a mortgage.

Both siblings are young. Who knows what could happen in the future. But on this scenario the younger sibling had been given unfair financial assistance, especially with the rise in interest rates etc.

I have two DC both in early adulthood. One potentially has greater earning potential than the other. But I still could not imagine a situation where assets are not split equally between them.

I don't understand these posts defending the parents because the sister isn't in a position to save enough, or have a good enough job. Or the OP getting a hard time because she chose to save up for a deposit and the sister hasn't. The fact is the parents are being extremely unfair. Unless the sister has some additional needs we don't know about, the op should get treated the same as her sister. The parents could wait and give her the house they are currently living in, but you never know what's going to happen, they may have to go into a care home and the house is sold etc, leaving the op with next to nothing and the sister has had the benefit of living in a house that's been paid for by her parents all her adult life.

Inheritance is a gift, but a given, but when it comes to siblings it should be 50/50 all the way

The answer is to mortgage the house for half it's value and give the capital sum to the sister to reduce her mortgage.

Genuine questio though, how would they divide the house between the two of you? Bit silly to sell it and pay capital gains tax (my family have limited assets and no property and decreasing the family wealth like that, especially when your parents might need care in their old age seems a risky thing to do, but that may be because I come at from a less privileged background and would never decrease family wealth for the sake of wanting "fair").
So then the other option would be they sign it over to both of you but your sister lives in it or pays half rent to you? Fair in monetary terms but could get awkward. Or you keep renting it out and split the proceeds? Again Fair, but then you both become landlords and all that entails whether you want to or not.

And I think the points about whether your parents will need this income in their old age is valid.

My point is, I guess, before you have a conversation with your parents about this, you should have some thought-through alternatives that you think would work and also appreciate that they might have wider financial plans than just a whole "this is unfair" spiel. And whilst it is unfair... I do think k you should pay a bit more attention to the posters reminding you how fortunate you've been. Whilst your parents decision IS unfair and you cam definitely point that out, if they stick with it, it's really not worth ruining your relationship over, especially given the position you are in and wealth you are likely to amass over your lifetime given that position.