Stepdaughter eating too much fruit

I have not followed this thread, but posted earlier.

This is my experience. Anyone in this situation I say do not take away any of DSD's control. Work with her and be with her together. Let her retain some control and allow her choices. If you wish to take substantive control, you will unleash a monster. Avoid anorexia at all costs. The years 7-14 are the danger zone. Yes, as young as seven. Food is the last control of any human, don't go that far.

🤦🏻‍♀️

She could be diabetic ?

Is she eating through boredom? Can you sign her up for Brownies it’s low cost and would keep her active.
It’s not good for your tummy to eat that much fruit. I’d stop buying so much on one go.

My dd 7 eats this amount of fruit daily too, and I honestly keep buying more because its better than them eating junk food constantly and if she can't finish her dinner because she's ate fruit, I really don't mind. Maybe set out an amount that she can have a day in her own bowl and encourage her to make it last her the day? But I definetly wouldn't mind this, you dh is right, at least its healthy choices and not sweets and crisps

Buy apples , bananas and pears. I wouldn’t be happy with this either. She is being greedy.

Far too much fruit - not the wonder she is having toilet accidents!As well as the expense.

As others have suggested:
a) try carrot sticks - there is a small amount of sugar in them, but they are healthier and are cheap (not too much of these either though)

b) cheaper fruit eg apples - take longer to eat and are less tempting. Soft fruit is particularly delicious as well as costly, and doesn't "fill you up" the way fruit such as apples does. The variety of fruit is also too tempting for her - keep it healthy but boring. We all of us eat less if our diet is unvaried.

I don't know whether she is comfort eating or just greedy, but it isn't good for her to be consuming this quantity of anything. Discouraging her by limiting variety would be better than rationing though, I think.

She's only a small child so it's not her fault. As her parents/step parents you need to make sure she eats a healthily and has a balanced diet.

If she is binge eating fruit to the point where she has accidents you need to make sure she doesn't have so much access to it, same as you would if she was binging sweets or crisps. It's not healthy to eat that much fruit.

Combine fruit with other thing, e.g. on top of porridge.

Also you really need to get her checked out and see a doctor. This is not normal and could be pointing towards some health issues.

You’re saying she will get through the lot. Then clearly that’s because you’re letting her? My almost 7 year old wouldn’t just help herself, so why aren’t you giving her more structure to her eating.
Your post sounds like you resent her being there to be honest, she’s probably picking up on that and the only comfort she’s getting in from food.

Strange thing to be annoyed over, I can understand fruit is expensive but don’t contribute to her having an unhealthy relationship with foods! Could you buy less fruit and buy carrots/cucumber etc instead and chop into sticks to leave in the fridge for snacks? Much cheaper than fruit but still healthy snacks

I’m vegetarian and only eat fresh food but I couldn’t eat that much fruit in two days. Buy less choice ( apples and pears only for example) buy frozen fruit for smoothies. Give her a lunch box and she can choose 2 or 3 portions of fruit for the day.

Both my ds do this and it drives me mad...but I tell them to snack on fruit so 🤷🏼.

Totally agree. And they have to be taught sharing and healthy eating habits.

Not allowed to gorge on fruit until they're ill. It's neglectful.

Put her daily fruit ‘allowance’ in a basket. This may be like you say 1 banana, a handful of grapes, 2x tangerines etc. Let her know she can eat this fruit whenever she likes but when the basket is empty thats it until the next day.

To be clear they would have a berry/ grape/ melon ball etc in each ice cube!

Op both my dc would munch through copious amounts of fruit, leaving none for me or dh, and I get your frustration at going to the fridge/ fruit bowl to find none left for you both.
I found an excellent solution was putting a berry in an ice cube tray, filling with water and freezing over night, they each had a 12 cube ration tray, which they could help themselves to. They are teen and nearly teen now and make the trays up themselves👍.

I totally agree that a 7yo shouldn’t be getting her own unlimited snacks all day long, especially not too close to meal times, and that your approach of snacking being nutritionally balanced and more substantial is sensible (thus minimising her feeling the need to eat enough fruit - which alone isn’t filling of course - for several adults a day). I suppose that’s exactly why she wrote this post as this thread has suggested lots of possible solutions.

But they haven't done this, op and her husband have instead argued about it, he's allowed her to gorge and she's branded her greedy and herself resentful. Over fruit.

Ij our house we'd say 'of course you can have strawberries' then we'd make a plate with strawberries, some yoghurt, a handful of Cheerios etc. Someone would portion and make the snack and hang out with our kids while they eat

He MIGHT go to the fridge for fruit himself but mostoy we discuss food and he knows he gets breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, supper so he'll request certain things but we ultimately give him food. He doesn't have to go foraging etc.

Butop and her husband aren't doing that. Why not? Why is she resenting a child for eating food and he's not bothering to parent?

I do agree that this example is a tad dramatic but I agree with the underlying sentiment that the fruit needs to be shared (albeit unequally, especially as the little girl loves her fruit) between 4 members of the family. So I agree with all the PPs who have said that she needs to learn that it’s to be shared by saying something like “we don’t want anyone to feel like a piece of fruit and it’s all gone.” I don’t think 7 is too young to start learning this in an age-appropriate way. Otherwise, she won’t just suddenly be a teenager who can share.

Ach sh. As someone who weaned my 1 yr old months ago and has a 5 yr old, if the strawberries were gone I'd mash a banana. It'd have been on me to have ensured I had what I needed available. Ridiculous

That's a lot of fruit and unsurprisingly it is killing her appetite and leading to loose stools.

You are carrying a ver heavy load.

It certainly doesn't sound as if you have landed a prize though.

Yours is a story told on here regularly.

Single solvent working woman lands herself with a single father that needs housing with children in tow....your prize is working part time.

You have married him as well and now are paying for his child too.

OP mind yourself, because men like him are ten a penny.

OP

Your husband needs to open a CMS claim on the child's mother.

Nobody seems to have taken in my point that uncontrolled raiding of food by ANYBODY in the household is unacceptable. The OP needs to set boundaries about what is up for general consumption and what isn't. Nominated shelf in the fridge or nominated fruit containers/bowls are a good start to this.

I am beginning to understand where all those threads about housemates in shared flats stealing all the food come from!

@Katey83 . I think you are doing a great job and coping well with all the changes that have come your way. Some posters! She has not told the child she is greedy, though the behaviour is greedy. Imagine if this behaviour is not stopped. You think future school friends and work colleagues won’t call it greedy.