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AIBU?

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Original poster

my partners smell is really getting me down

189 replies

gjkufbb · 29/04/2023 18:46

Just that really. We've had numerous chats in the past about personal hygiene. It doesn't seem to sink in.
I don't think he's depressed, he only showers once a week - if I'm lucky. He has terrible breath even if he brushed his teeth twice a day and I'm not sure why it's so bad.

I don't want to be near him and I feel awful about it. We have a great relationship otherwise. Genuinely don't know what to do anymore. Am I unreasonable if I'm brutally honest with him and tell him it's getting to me this much? Or should I just suck it up 😣

OP posts:
PollyPeptide · 29/04/2023 18:53

You have to tell him and it's a kindness for you to do that. Obviously everyone will know he smells too and that's upsetting for him if he thinks he's OK. If you can't be honest with him, who can be?
(And, honestly, even if he were depressed, he'd still need to know.)

LouBaloo · 29/04/2023 18:52

Leave. I have no idea why people choose to stay with someone who only showers once a week. Jesus the house must stink as well with him in it.

Original poster
gjkufbb · 29/04/2023 18:52

CarrotCake01 · 29/04/2023 18:49

How long have you been together?

4 years. I always used to tell him he smelt so nice when I saw him. Long gone are the days 😣

OP posts:
maranella · 29/04/2023 18:51

How can your relationship be great with a guy that stinks? He showers ONCE A WEEK? He's got awful breath? Bleugh! Total deal-breaker.

ElmTree22 · 29/04/2023 18:51

Once a week?! That's ridiculous. You must be honest with him. No one should live like that!

Sapphire387 · 29/04/2023 18:51

Relationship deal breaker. Shows he just can't be bothered.

Original poster
gjkufbb · 29/04/2023 18:51

icelollycraving · 29/04/2023 18:48

Omg do you sleep in the same bed?
I’d say now the weather is warming up he needs to shower daily. I couldn’t have sex with someone who smelt.

No I won't sleep in the same bed any more. Sex life is non existent atm. I just don't know why it's got so bad. Life's busy but surely there's no better feeling that being clean

OP posts:
MyBloodyMaryneedsmoreTabasco · 29/04/2023 18:50

How can it possibly be a good relationship if he's so scummy? I do hope you aren't having a sexual relationship with him.

BHRK · 29/04/2023 18:50

Once a week. No way would I accept that. It’s once a day here. Sorry but I’d have to leave

HotPenguin · 29/04/2023 18:50

Does he work? Surely he can't go to a job smelling like that? Yanbu!

AnElegantChaos · 29/04/2023 18:49

Nope, you shouldn't have to suck that up! Unless he can't afford to use the hot water then he's got no excuse for not showering. A trip to the dental hygienist is also in order. I think you need to tell him - other people will have noticed too.

CarrotCake01 · 29/04/2023 18:49

How long have you been together?

icelollycraving · 29/04/2023 18:48

Omg do you sleep in the same bed?
I’d say now the weather is warming up he needs to shower daily. I couldn’t have sex with someone who smelt.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 29/04/2023 18:48

Absolutely don’t suck it up. He sounds grim. No respect for himself or for you.

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