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Original poster

Should my 8 year old nephew have his hair permed?

92 replies

KateGrace · 02/04/2023 16:00

My 8 year old nephew has disclosed to his dad (my brother) this weekend that his mum is going to get his hair permed. My brother has asked his ex not to get it done as he is too young. She refuses to listen and has stated that she is going ahead with it anyway. Are we being unreasonable?

OP posts:
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Krieger · 07/05/2024 20:32

Yanbu, unless the child is a precocious antiques dealer.

PossiblyNow · 07/05/2024 19:48

Desolate2nite · 07/05/2024 19:45

Daughter of a hairdresser in the 60s, I'm 58 now but had my first perm at 2 years old. My hair is still very thick and undamaged lol

2!!!

PossiblyNow · 07/05/2024 19:47

Thepeopleversuswork · 02/04/2023 16:47

But why? It's naff as fuck, expensive and damaging for the hair. Just don't see the upside.

There’s no upside, but I’ve seen quite a lot of perms in tween and teen boys over the last few years — it’s perfectly possible it’s the child’s own idea. A friend of mine’s then 11 year old persuaded him to let him have it done last year, though I’m not sure most middle-aged men would have any knowledge of what chemicals are involved…

I was waiting for my own young DS to have his hair cut last year and one of the barbers was explaining very kindly to a boy on the phone that no, he couldn’t book in for his first perm at 4.45 because the salon closed at 5.30.

Desolate2nite · 07/05/2024 19:45

Daughter of a hairdresser in the 60s, I'm 58 now but had my first perm at 2 years old. My hair is still very thick and undamaged lol

Toodleoodleooh · 07/05/2024 19:41

He’s 8. 8 year olds don’t get perms. End of

Clearinguptheclutter · 07/05/2024 19:32

zombie thread. My fault. Sorry

BobbyBiscuits · 07/05/2024 19:28

It will be easy enough to cut it off, so I don't really see the issue, as long as the kid wants it. Tbh I would not even be telling kids that young that they can change the curliness or colour of their hair. I'd be worried it would make them insecure about what's there naturally. I honestly thought perms were dead since the late 80s. But hey, maybe it will look great? 🙄

fungipie · 07/05/2024 19:22

Rewis · 02/04/2023 16:03

What does the kid want? If he does, what's the concern?

He is 8, not 16!

Clearinguptheclutter · 07/05/2024 19:18

ps would love an update form the OP but yes unreasonable at any age against their will, surely

Clearinguptheclutter · 07/05/2024 19:17

I know this is old but I felt I needed to revisit.

a boy in ds’s class (year 4 so 9 or possibly 8) has turned up today rocking the alpaca look. I really hope ds doesn’t want one. I knew it was the thing for high school boys but at 9? Wow.

BeautifulWar · 03/04/2023 16:22

I get not wanting to perm young kids hair but why all the nasty comments about boys with curly hair? The 'llama look', 'look like Ronald mcdonald'.

I have never seen anyone with curly hair sporting this hairstyle before. The comments are referring to the hairstyle, not curly hair. A mullet looks hideous but isn't an indictment against straight hair!

Ooo OP you have set all the pearl clutchers off haven't you!

I doubt anyone is scandalised, they just think it's not age appropriate and unsafe.

sheeeeeeshh · 03/04/2023 09:11

Ooo OP you have set all the pearl clutchers off haven't you! 🤣

CJsGoldfish · 02/04/2023 22:59

What's this 'we' OP? What business is it of yours?

Whilst it's not something I'd do at that age, my philosophy with my own children is that it is only hair so whatever they want to do, it's up to them 🤷‍♀️
My own kids. What other kids, related or not, do or don't do is never on my radar

Pubesofsoberness · 02/04/2023 22:28

I don't know any hairdresser who would perm an 8 year olds hair

queenofthewild · 02/04/2023 22:27

Half the boys in my area are trotting about with hair like alpacas at the moment. Most are year 6 and above though.

Thankfully DS appears not to have noticed though. I can't be doing with the faff or expense.

I don't have nephews, but what my nieces do with their hair isn't my concern. I enjoy their company but don't get involved in hair or fashion choices.

Brieandme · 02/04/2023 22:21

Any reputable hairdresser wouldn't do it. Chemical treatments such as perms and dyes carry risks, and they won't be insured. The chemicals used aren't tested/approved on children so the business insurance is invalidated. That's before getting into the issues around fashion/maintenance on a young child.

I've looked into the legalities of a few things like this due to working with children in residential children's homes. Parental consent shouldn't be the only factor here!

CascaChan · 02/04/2023 21:49

I had my hair permed at 9 (very late 80s) and it did me no harm. That being said, it looked bloody terrible. A perm is always unreasonable.

Sapphire387 · 02/04/2023 21:30

You're the aunt - she's the mum. Not your business.

Echobelly · 02/04/2023 21:23

My guess is either he or mum want it because of the 'big mass of hair on top shaved back and sides' look that a lot of boys have these days. Seems a bit OTT to me, but if it's what he wants, then I think he's welcome to go for it.

Viviennemary · 02/04/2023 21:22

That is beyond ridiculous. I doubt a reputable hairdresser would do it. The child could be allergic to the chemicals.

Offensiveapprently · 02/04/2023 21:22

That's up to his parents. Its just hair.

meatballsoup · 02/04/2023 21:20

Not sure about getting a perm but what's with all the sarky comments about boys with curly hair?. My boys have curly tops & they certainly don't look like poodles.

JulieLouiseK · 02/04/2023 20:10

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

defi · 02/04/2023 19:58

Some kids actually have naturally curly hair which looks very simular if not the same. Maybe keep your opinions to yourself and not be nasty and insensitive.

^ agreed my son has beautiful curly hair and it's cut short back and sides. So it is the "meet me at McDonald's haircut" without the need for a perm

chevvyroo · 02/04/2023 17:47

I've just googled this "meet me at McDonald's" round my way (south london) in the 80's, this was called a "top heavy" perm. You wait long enough, it comes back into fashion.

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