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AIBU?

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To wonder how I approach my neighbour about her nude son

533 replies

Meanswell · 26/03/2023 22:14

So i feel quite awkward in posting this but i am wondering the best approach as I don’t want to upset anyone but i need to protect my child.

A neighbour who lives near me has a teenage son with non verbal autism. He sometimes like to stand outside the front of the houses. Today my daughter was taking the dog out for a walk. He was outside naked with everything on display. My daughter stood in one spot and he kind of ran towards her. She came straight back in and locked the doo. I genuinely don’t think he meant anything by it but he was left alone for a couple of minutes.

I genuinely don’t want to upset his mum and I know he doesn’t understand why he cannot do that. My daughter feels quite shocked and said she will never go out the front again. I am now worried if he acts inappropriately again, how do I approach this situation gently.

OP posts:
Keeween · 26/03/2023 22:22

Do you think she’s unaware of the situation and needs it brought to her attention? Do you think she’s not already doing all she can to keep him, and others, safe and comfortable? Do you think your input will positively and significantly change their day to day lives?
I get that this was somewhat distressing for your daughter but what could you possibly raise with this boys mother that would help the situation?!

Mumdiva99 · 26/03/2023 22:21

Protect your child from what?

How does she get on with the boy when he is clothed? Would she normally talk to him? If so then nothing bad has happened. I'm sure his parents are trying hard to look after him and as you say he was left alone for a short time.

Teach your daughter to treat him with compassion. Of course she can come back in if she's uncomfortable. But no need to be scared of him.

Dacadactyl · 26/03/2023 22:21

How old is your child?
Is she a teenager and being overly dramatic? Does she know and understand his issues?
Has he done this before?

I appreciate that, at any age, your daughter would have been freaked out by this. But, I haven't voted because I am curious as to how you answer the above.

CalistoNoSolo · 26/03/2023 22:21

I think you're being way more understanding than I would be if that had happened to my daughter. Or me tbh.

Meanswell · 26/03/2023 22:20

yes really. His mum is very overprotective of him and i dont think she knew anyone saw him. Its also a matter of safety for him also .

I have told my daughter, she kind of understands but she is early teens and I think she is shocked still

OP posts:
pncr · 26/03/2023 22:20

She already knows I'm sure and I'm sure it was just an oversight on her part.

I'm sure she is doing her best.

(I used to live near a young man who sounds similar. He went through a phase of wanting to be naked but it stopped after a while. I assume his parents and school worked on it with him).

lipstickwoman · 26/03/2023 22:18

I'd just talk to your daughter and explain. Simple.

Your neighbour is probably completely mortified and doing the best she can. There was nothing malicious or pervy. Your daughter needs to understand there are people in this life who need some tolerance and understanding

GrazingSheep · 26/03/2023 22:17

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