Friend wants to stay on our couch for 3/4 weeks

😂so tempting!

Second all the PPs saying no, but do be mindful of not giving excuses as to why you can't help as that opens the door to them "problem solving" the various obstacles for you. A simple, "No, that doesn't work for us" is all you need to say. If he gets shitty, he gets shitty! Just close the convo down then block on all SM.

Look on the whole thing as an opportunity to rid yourself of an unappreciative user.

They sound like a dreadful pair. It’s not nice being injured, but unless he’s got bigger issues with frailty and poor health, a pair of broken/injured ankles is a major inconvenience but not impossible to overcome.

I don’t really understand his mentality. I’d think it far, far worse to sleep on a friend’s sofa and be uncomfortable and in the way…and still have to get myself to the loo, etc (unless he’s expecting you to help with that too?!). I’d rather get on with it in my own bed and in my own company. I’ve never broken an ankle, but I did have my full leg in plaster up to my thigh and bruising to other body parts when I lived alone in a flat with stairs in my 20s. It’s amazing how ingenious you can become when you have to.

Anyway, he hasn’t been kind to you and you don’t owe him anything. I echo responses from pp saying to just tell him no.

Say no. If he has an existing disability direct him to occupational therapy/Adult social services. Occupational therapy may advise him to buy/supply him with a commode.

Add his photo to this and send it back to him with NOT HAPPENING in the subject line

It's would be a no from me, my ex had this same issue and it was not just 3/4 weeks of recovery time. If you agree to it, there will be requests to extend the stay for about 2 months.

It’s not the OP’s problem to solve, so don’t start making suggestions about commodes and alternative solutions.

Just a simple no is fine in this situation. If he keeps hassling you, just block him and say you are done.

‘Hi Gerry, no can do. Hope you get something sorted’, and then block or mute, even for a few weeks. It’s sounds like he has you at his beck and call.

‘I simply cannot accommodate you on this, I hope you find a solution’ (that doesn’t include me).

@BreadInCaptivity has a good point OP, just think of the state of your sofa after he has slept on it for a month, eeww

It’s ok to say no. You don’t even need all these reasons. No is a full answer, and you’re allowed to have limits!

He's using emotional blackmail telling you he's your family. No he isn't, he's delusional.

Dont explain, don't complain approach on this one, he doesn't warrant any explanation as to why he can't sleep on your sofa.

No is a complete sentence should do it.

Say no, and take great pleasure in it.

If you lose his friendship, so much the better.

Yanbu. Even without the backstory, barring the direst emergencies (or hosting that you choose) it’s not realistic to host guests on a sofa in a common space for more than a couple of nights. It’s a real inconvenience for everyone else in the house.

having managed stairs very easily with two broken ankles, just tell him to go up forwards on his hands and knees, and to go down backwards on his hands and knees.

stairs are easier than crossing flat floor, with broken ankles

When I was reading it I didn’t think it was fair to you but I did sympathise that his injuries would make it difficult for him and then I read he has a girlfriend!

How preposterous to even suggest he flop on your sofa. He will have the heating on all day, your tv on and probably make a mess that he will claim he can’t clear up.

He sounds utterly ghastly and a piss taker.

He is a user and not even pleasant about it.

I would drop him like a hot potato.

I'd just ignore and block, don't enter into dialogue and DONT OPEN THE DOOR to him or his gf, or next thing you know they'll be in your home, ensconced in your bedroom as 'you know how much he needs this help'.....

Absolutely no! Even if he was the best friend in the world (and he sounds awful), it simply wouldn’t work. Don’t contemplate it one second longer. Also, whilst you’re at it, I would be reassessing my friendship with this person entirely. It doesn’t sound like a positive one for you at all.

'No, that doesn't work for me/us - we/I have gone out of our way for you in the past and that courtesy doesn't appear to work both ways. This would cause us a lot of stress when you do have alternative options. Suggest you buy a commode from Amazon and your partner can aid you with that and anything else you need.'

You'll probably get backlash and further rudery, which you can then cite as another reason why you don't want to be subjected to him solidly for 3/4 weeks (how many appointments can he have, surely once dealt with its simply a matter of time!)

Don’t even think about letting this awful person into your home! Some great advice on here as always; please follow it!

Tell him to jog on. Well, hop.

‘Our sofa isn’t an option, we have too much on but in any case I think you need to ask someone you haven’t ignored for a couple of months because I dared be upset your friend was extremely rude to me.’

So his own family are sick of his using and his GF's family are probably the same as he (and she) is so see no issue with using people.....what a surprise.

Hard No on this and every other request.

"Family" who will always be there for you would not ignore your upset at what their twat of a friend said.

You are useful to them, thats all. When you are not useful they dont want to know you. Sorry to be harsh but thats the truth.

I would reply with "Cant stay with us, sorry. Bet you wouldnt have asked if we had got on with getting ourselves some ankle biters like your other friend suggested though would you?! haha!!" Then block.

I generally don't ignore messages, but given that he's ignored yours for two months, I agree with @imSatanhonest and ignore this one! He's not your friend, he's a user.