To not understand why people turn off read receipts on WhatsApp

It’s things like when a friend sends you a lengthy message about something they’re upset about, like their partner has pissed them off or something.

And you’re busy. You’re out with your children enjoying the day. But because you don’t immediately start engaging in a “awww hun <lengthy message>“ conversation the friend gets annoyed.

In the scenario where someone hadn’t acknowledged plans, don’t you just message again?

‘Oi, bro - aunt is asking whether to expect you on Sunday at 12. Can you confirm please?’

*In group

I think it’s a setting for the whole of WhatsApp so it’s not necessarily about you not seeing that they’ve read it but others. But it’s automatic I’m group chats- you can’t turn it off! Set up a group for an event or friendship group.

I turned them off because I couldn't be doing with other people's neurotic behaviour, obsessing over when I replied to messages in relation to when I'd seen them. I can't turn them off for individuals, they're either on or off for everyone.

That aside, someone having seen your message isn't a response to it, or agreement to it, its literally just them having seen it in some capacity.

Because I don't want to get wrapped up in thoughts about why people haven't replied when they've read my messages and I want to be able to read and reply to messages at my own convenience. It's just easier for me if privacy is maintained in both directions. Can't turn them off for group messages which is a bit annoying.

This is why I don't have WhatsApp. Stick to old fashion texts.

You don't pay its all included in your phone package.
Unlimited Calls and Texts.

Absolutely, its basic communication

Also to echo someone else, I notice that messages come through not in the order they're sent sometimes and this makes for quite confusing conversation at times!!!

I don't care how many ticks there are
I don't care what colour they are
I don't care when someone was last online
If they don't confirm they will be at ABC at XYZ o clock then I'm not going because nothing has been confirmed.

Yes, having conducted a thorough in depth and rigorous experiment this morning with my and OHs phone I can say this is whats happening. I dont get any grey ticks but it assumes that the message has been read when it comes up on the screen when using the phone for other things, because by default it seems to open the message

Whether thats correct or not I couldnt say

Ive also now (thanks to this thread) turned off my online status and message status because I have a friend who does the same thing with tons of question marks if I dont get back instantly its really rude.

Sounds more like poor communication... and i say that as someone who has read receipts off.

I wouldn’t rely on WA at the moment anyway, even with read receipts on - lots of people I know have and issues with missing notifications or unreliable ones. I’ve spent ages troubleshooting my WA and am sometimes getting regular notifications as normal and sometimes not - and that can happen even during a conversation.

Why can’t you call to confirm or say going forward WA is too unreliable so you need SMS confirmation or a call or you assume whatever has been organised is not going ahead?

@Etinoxaurus, you know the answer. Because people will message you when they want you to know something. And because although it might be fine for someone to see a read receipt in the example you mentioned, there are other cases, where it creates confusion for people to see read receipts.

I already mentioned in another comment that when I receive messages and can't respond or think about them immediately, it creates confusion for people to think I'm hurrying to fulfill their orders!

Strictly speaking it means the mesage has been opened, no way to tell if the person has read it

My phone can be annoying and open messages when I unlock it, I don't always then read it as I may need to do something more urgent but to the sender it will look as if I have

My dh does this due to some tin foil hat nonsense somewhere in his brain.
It means in reality that if I am out and message him, I never know whether he has got the message. Can you pick up child 2 at 12? Who the fuck knows. We both arrive, me cos he has not responded, him because he had got the message.

I have mine turned off so I don't feel under pressure to reply to people whilst at work or dealing with DC.

I have a friend that will keep sending messages if people have read theirs and not replied and it's so annoying so this stops that .

It's because some people (you'll see it all the time on here) get upset when the person they're messaging is online and doesn't instantly read their message or reads their message and don't instantly respond.

I agree.

But this is the reason why I’d never turn them off.

Many times I will read a message and not reply.
Either because I don’t want to or I am busy and will reply later.

Either way it wouldn’t bother me if they got upset about it as that’s their issue, not mine.
I am not there to drop everything I am doing just reply to someone straight away.

I agree with that. The people I know who do it love a bit of power play.

Um, the whole point of WA is not to have to phone for every small thing. Until recently I was paying per call, why the hell do I have to pay to talk to someone because they don't want blue ticks?

If you swipe your message on your phone you can see whether it's been seen.

Yes, but if you don't get blue ticks to that you don't know if they know you're threatening to cancel and you'd end up having to call them.

It is if we’re meeting and I’ve messaged you to confirm I’ll be there on time. Why the secret squirrel act?!

Mine have been off for just about as long as I can remember. A friend would message "have I done something wrong" if I didn't reply in minutes and I thought fuck this.
It annoys me that you can see I've read messages in group chat but hey ho.
No ones business but mine thank you

"Read receipts wouldn't actually help you in that circumstance anyway would they? You'd know they'd read it, but you wouldn't know if they agree to the plans. You need a reply, not a read receipt."

Presumably they've agreed to meet or whatever, but the details may have changed e.g. we're meeting at the Black Lion at 7, not the Blue Bells at 6. I don't need a reply to that, just the blue tick to know the person has seen it or I have to spend time (and potentially money) texting and calling the person.