Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it awkward to date a man a lot skinnier an you?

90 replies

pearlearringgirl · 03/01/2023 16:55

There’s a man who Im not sure if I'm interested in or not…. He’s handsome and has a good personality.

Just don’t know though… He’s a lot skinnier than I am. I’m not overweight as such but I’m a little curvy. I have never been with a man thinner than me though so I’m just wondering if it would feel awkward especially in intimate moments. I like him but I’m worried I will end up feeling self conscious.

Am I being unreasonable to worry about this?

OP posts:
Runningfire · 03/01/2023 19:48

Oooh I love skinny men so much….

toocold54 · 03/01/2023 19:44

I think it depends how skinny.

Anyone that is too skinny or too fat isn’t going to be attractive to me.

I don’t mind slim (or chunkier) men and I am curvy so things like my thighs will be bigger than most mens but I wouldn’t want to feel like I’m going to break someone 😂

Do you think he’ll be able to lift you up?
I think I’d be slightly put off by a man who couldn’t lift me up if they needed to.

RocketIceLollie · 03/01/2023 19:22

If the guy likes you what does it matter? Everyone has different types and some men prefer fuller woman.

Hankunamatata · 03/01/2023 19:19

None of mine were gym bunnies though just naturally slim

Hankunamatata · 03/01/2023 19:19

Nope. Always been 16 plus usually and always dated slim guys

RainyDaysAndGreySkies · 03/01/2023 19:18

My ex is very skinny, I’m very fat. It worked just fine, never ever any issues even with me on top - which was incidentally his favourite position.

ridiculoso82 · 03/01/2023 19:10

AlmostAJillSandwich · 03/01/2023 18:59

Im a good 5.5 stone heavier than my partner, yes, i feel super awkward about it in every situation. We actually haven't ever been intimate in any way yet despite being together just over 2 years, due to meds he's on giving him 0 sex drive and only seeing eachother once a week. His Birthday is July 1st, i'm hoping to shift a decent ammount of weight by then and maybe things will happen, i'm certainly hoping so!

Is this a relationship? Once a week…. What do you do?

SarahAshley2 · 03/01/2023 19:10

It’s only awkward if you don’t find him attractive. The fact you’ve brought it up probably means it’s an issue for you. I’d find it massively off putting but I’m a size 6-8 so anyone smaller than me as a man would be teeny tiny!

SPlRlT · 03/01/2023 19:09

I found it awkward but I don't care or flinch if I saw a couple like that.

I have dated guys who were thinner than me, they were really underweight maybe 16 BMI? and I was a BMI of 21 or 22 and in my late teens, early twenties. We had idiot 'friends' point it out and had names like Jack Sprat and even been called dumpy next to him (he was also tall). In the end it got under my skin and his, he started suggesting I lose weight and that he will go and bulk up.

In my twenties I later went out with a guy built more like a rugby builder and the way I felt feminine, small and he could sweep me off my feet was amazing, it made me feel so girly and protected.

I now in my 30s would date a man slimmer than me as met strong slim men and weak bigger guys... if he is slim but athletic and strong and if the difference of weight and height isn't too great between us then yes. I hated the huge (1ft+) height difference because I felt like I was his daughter walking next to him and couldn't kiss properly.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 03/01/2023 18:59

Im a good 5.5 stone heavier than my partner, yes, i feel super awkward about it in every situation. We actually haven't ever been intimate in any way yet despite being together just over 2 years, due to meds he's on giving him 0 sex drive and only seeing eachother once a week. His Birthday is July 1st, i'm hoping to shift a decent ammount of weight by then and maybe things will happen, i'm certainly hoping so!

chubbachub · 03/01/2023 18:55

Yes it's awkward
If you are having these thoughts now, you won't ever be able to relax during sex or want to go on top without fear of crushing him 😆

My ex was definitely lighter than me and also the same height I just felt like a wobbly jelly mess.

My now Dh is about 4stone heavier and a foot taller and its perfect.

nancydroo · 03/01/2023 18:40

I think if was teens and early 20s would be open to dating a skinny man. But to settle down with, no.

pearlearringgirl · 03/01/2023 18:28

brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 03/01/2023 18:06

just don’t snap him

🤣🤣🤣

Had a good laugh reading some of these comments.

It’s good to see it worked out ok for many of you… Maybe I should give him a try 😏

I was mostly worried I would feel really big in comparison to him 😳 I’m a curvy size 12 and I’m used to feeling small next to my partners lol

OP posts:
OnlyFannys · 03/01/2023 18:26

I have to say skinny is my one shallow dealbreaker. I'm not bothered about height or if they are overweight but I'm just not attracted to skinny guys. I feel bad admitting that because I know many men struggle to bulk up

scaredysquiggle · 03/01/2023 18:17

My last partner was the same weight as me but with a very well sculpted chest and narrow hips and slim legs. I'm curvy but very fit. It all worked very well. Especially with my on top the narrowness of his hips allowed for great pelvic compatibility

PaperMonster · 03/01/2023 18:10

OH is skinny. I do miss a chunkier bloke.

RambamThankyouMam · 03/01/2023 18:07

My DH is very lithe whereas I'm, eh, what you might call Rubenesque. It's never been an issue for us. If the chemistry is there!

GoldenCupidon · 03/01/2023 18:07

there are a lot of couples out there that look like a number 10 in silhouette, although who's the 1 and who's the 0 can vary.

Nice to see my fellow skinny lovers on here! (disclaimer, I have dated men of all shapes, it's just skinny was my "type" for years)

brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 03/01/2023 18:06

just don’t snap him

ChigedyJigHeeHawHeeHawItsDominicTheDonkey · 03/01/2023 18:02

Nah. I'm 4 stone fatter than my other half!!

MistyGreenAndBlue · 03/01/2023 18:01

I only like 'em skinny. I've been porky and slim and back to porky over the years. Never made a difference really. I'm ok to go on top too. Men can be lazy buggers and never seemed to mind 😂.

GoldenCupidon · 03/01/2023 17:56

Not at all awkward, I'm curvier (as a shape, whether I'm a size 10 or a 14) and always fancied tall, slim men. Works great and often it's a case of opposites attracting I think.

Rustyhandlebars · 03/01/2023 17:52

Skinny men are usually attracted to curvier women from my experience of friends . I'm very slim and I have only had chunky partners.

Wombats67 · 03/01/2023 17:51

Yep, I'm 20kg and best part of a foot shorter than my lovely DH. I threaten divorce when he goes too skinny.

I did once dump a guy as he had a 6-pack but was very short and I felt like a hovercraft next to him but it's all ok with DH. You need to feel comfortable for a good relationship!

GhostBridezilla · 03/01/2023 17:46

My DH is much skinnier than me. It’s all good.

Swipe left for the next trending thread