To not understand the nastiness that being a housewife provokes 2

I think there are a healthy number of exceptions to this but it’s certainly the case that my female friends in high stress jobs are much more unhappy/anxious about it than the men.

@TartanGirl1 femininity. A woman's nature is to nurture . Most women are happier in soft easy environments . The new wave of "i can do it all" boss girl bullshit is making women more miserable than ever but its too late to admit now

@Refrosty she is not wrong!

@AMorningstar is a man. Good wind up sir

You don't have to be a wage slave or a capitalist. I could quit work if I wanted too and sit at home. I enjoy looking after some of the most vulnerable in society. My DD is immensely proud of her mum's job.

What true nature?

I’ve never understood the vitriol. When children are small, childcare is a fortune. It can be a nightmare juggling costs and being at nursery and school and then they all get chicken pox
and a stomach bug follows. I can totally see why it’s more cost effective and way easier - if you can afford it - to be a SAHP with small children. Even in the early years of school, it’s tough.

I don’t judge because I don’t care and I also don’t know what goes on in individual peoples homes. Perhaps the SAHP is independently very wealthy or has a hidden health problem that nobody knows about. Either way, I wouldn’t judge or comment - not my business.

The comments about “wage slave” from @AMorningstar are interesting. I hope you don’t say that to your children’s teachers or nurse - both very female dominated professions. If my husband was a SAHD and referred to me being a “wage slave”, I’d not be slaving for his benefit anymore! I totally get that marriages/relationships are based on team work and this might mean one half isn’t in paid employment. However, it’s disrespectful to suggest that being in paid employment makes you a “slave”. People do all sorts of jobs and time patterns - shift work, self employment, locum and supply work etc.

Nice to see someone has gone quiet.

My only question about this whole thread is you want healthcare to be accessible to children within 24 hours but would also like women to be paid to be off work until their child is school age.

The NHS especially nursing and midwifery which on the whole are pretty female dominated places of work- women that at some point in their career will be of child bearing age, are facing the biggest staff shortage ever. If you think that you could offer years and years of paid leave to women and live in a world where health care systems are improved then you are mad. Also women that are highly trained in a niche field, how do we cover their leave?

you should get out more.

Exactly. That's what a thoroughly healthy response looks like. But when the interminable SAHM vs. WOHM issue arises, as this thread beautifully demonstrates, it's when people view any setup different from their own as some form of gratuitous insult. Likewise, it rears its ugly head when they start demanding 'respect' for their decisions from others.

It's not up to me to 'support other women's choices' merely because I also happen to be female. In turn, I'm not insecure enough in my own life decisions to seek validation for them online, or to write screeds of angst about why I perceive other women disrespect my choices. I don't care what others do, and personally don't give a shiny shit what others think to the way I structure my life. But these threads indicate that some people do care, intensely so, and are seemingly willing to devote hours of their time to attacking others on the subject.

This kind of discussion simply wouldn't exist if it never occurred to people to seek respect and validation for their lifestyle choices from others who have precisely squat to do with them, and whose decisions affect their lives not one iota. That's the way it is for men, who typically never get embroiled in similar 'debates'. But the reasons for that - principally because they've never had to as long as women have provided a convenient scapegoat - is a whole other thread.

Yeah, I'm slowly coming to that conclusion.

On another thread she was talking about how she has an autistic son who frequently hits her.

I simply can't see how a mother of a special needs kid could ever boast about how relaxed and well rested she is or how she'd find the time to argue on MN for hours and hours.

Indeed! The OP has some very misogynistic, masculine and outdated views on women!!

The poster is clearly not who they are presenting as, that much is very clear and someone with some obvious issues with women

Actually she says she has more energy than us because she's well rested.

@AMorningstar i am
Suprised you have the energy to fight with the MN women who
Would
Never depend on any Man
Sad unhappy women who forgot their true nature

Who knows, but I dont see it anywhere except Mumsnet tbh. In real life I've never heard a conversation disparaging housewives. Not everyone defines themselves via jobs they do outside the home - it's best to ignore dissenters and just do you. Too many of us as women spend far too much time not being confident in our own life choices, and pointlessly worrying about what other women think.

I can't imagine getting myself in a tizz over whether my neighbour is a housewife or not

@AMorningstar

didn't put mine in any form of childcare

Neither did I.

I'm bored of this now anyway. You clearly don't value the same things I do.

Clearly not. I value equality and equal parenting and you value, well I'm not actually sure tbh

But who cares? We don't have to.

Perfectly put @Refrosty

George Bernard Shaw has it ...

Leaving a 6 month old baby would be horrific imo. I didn't put mine in any form of childcare until they were 4 and that was very part time. Each to their own but it would've broken my heart to leave my babies at that age. Plus theyre still night waking at that time too.

I'm bored of this now anyway. You clearly don't value the same things I do.

Oh gosh poor cats if a crazy cat lady. She probably considers getting off her waxed arse to feed them, being a job .

Please just do us a favour and put your housecoat on and jump back in your tardis to 1950 where you belong. Your husband is waiting for his slippers, sex and supper. Off you pop now.

@AMorningstar

No one said they should.

6 months each is plenty.

That’s nice dear 🤣