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Original poster

To not be happy with my GP reaction to depression?

34 replies

foxcote90 · 22/10/2022 08:14

So I spoke to the doctor a couple of weeks ago about my postnatal depression and she just told me that I need to go outside and exercise more. I don't know what I was expecting, but I suppose more help than that?!

Apologies in advance for the ramble and general brain dump...

I've had 2 babies in 18 months of each other - the youngest is now nearly 1. I'm self employed so in both cases had to go back to work within 3-4 weeks but part time ish and then build up from there.

The first was born in early lockdown and despite having to work with no extra childcare I really enjoyed that time.

When second was born we had childcare in place 5 days a week as both me and OH are self employed so couldn't take paid leave.

After 2nd birth all was great but over time I have felt more and more detached from real life and now I think of it, feel like I've just been in a haze for the past year. I've definitely struggled to find joy in situations and whilst I can easily engage with friends, I definitely don't feel like I am enjoying that time as much as normal.

Also, because I have been working since baby was born, I've realised I have become very detached. Until very recently I genuinely think I would have struggled to identify her in a line up and although I breastfeed I've really struggled to register the cuddles and time I have with her.

I said to my husband the other day that I definitely haven't had a years worth of cuddles which makes me desperately sad. Partly because I'm working but even when I'm there I'm not really 'there'.

2nd baby is also a terrible sleeper so I haven't had a full nights sleep since she was born - which i know is very common and not helping the situation

Also - TMI, sorry - after first baby, periods came back after 6 months and suddenly I felt back to my normal self. This time they came back at 3 months but I don't think the hormonal response came with it and I still feel really flat.

So after all of that, what I'd love to know is, is it NORMAL? Is my GP right and I just need to get outside and exercise more. She said she can prescribe pills but doesn't think I need it.

I don't know whether I should be calling her back and trying to push more or whether this is all normal and I should just take her advice.

Or should I be pushing for pills or something else?

If you have any similar experience I would really appreciate knowing what you've done. Thank you so much

OP posts:
ElectedOnThursday · 22/10/2022 08:50

Well I feel for you. Your GP appointment left you feeling dismissed and that is never a nice feeling.

What you have described here is a huge life change in a very short space of time, and huge stresses. You have two babies and you work full time. I don't care what anyone says, no one should have to do this. It is completely at odds with what is natural and healthy for everyone. You & baby need unpressured time together to bond, this is very important, and working FT with young children is always extremely challenging (unless there is a ton of support in place)

Whether or not pills would be helpful for you I think you need a break and, if at all possible, to make some adjustments so that you have fewer pressures. You only get a short time with your children when they are babies, it's really worth it.

CottonSock · 22/10/2022 08:39

Try what the GP said and ring back if you don't feel its enough and ask directly for antidepressants. I doubt they would refuse if that's what you want.

CatHatSat · 22/10/2022 08:39

FWIW, I found medication to be a the key to getting better. They cleared the “fog” enough for me to be able to get better.

lannistunut · 22/10/2022 08:36

I think you should try to see another GP for a more detailed conversation as well as following all the available self-help advice.

One of the reasons self-help is pushed is that for mild depression it can be extremely effective, but you should still feel supported by your GP as PND is different to general low mood/depression.

CatHatSat · 22/10/2022 08:36

I’m of the opposite opinion. You know yourself and you know you have reached a point where you need/want help.

Please go back and ask to see a different doctor.

Bestcatmum · 22/10/2022 08:26

If you do decide to try the pills take a low dose for a short time.

Bestcatmum · 22/10/2022 08:24

I dont think you should rush for the pills. I have to take them forever or I start having hallucinations. And hearing voices.
I'd do anything not to have to take them. They make you feel flat and dead all the time as if you are dreaming through life, you put weight on, you can't and don't want a sex life at all.
Having 2 children in a very short time is a massive life change like a death, moving house, being in a war. Its hard to adjust and you are working and not getting any sleep.
I think your GP is right.
Make sure you get some time in the day for you to walk, read, nap, pursue a hobby. Don't let guilt get you. Just do what you can. Don't try and be superwoman.

BattenburgDonkey · 22/10/2022 08:21

I agree try her advice. I’m not minimising your feelings, but it doesn’t necessarily sound like post natal depression that needs meds, it sounds like you are incredibly busy and exhausted and that could cause you to feel sad and detached because you don’t have any time with your baby, which are normal feelings in your situation. If you can avoid medication then I’d absolutely try that first, and then go back to the GP if it doesn’t work. Must be so difficult being self employed and not being able to take a break.

girlmom21 · 22/10/2022 08:16

I think you should take her advice for a few weeks and see how you feel. It sounds like work takes over - maybe just try and slow down a little bit.

Call back in a few weeks if you've made positive changes that haven't helped.