27 years old, parents opening my post

(3)A person commits an offence if, intending to act to a person's detriment and without reasonable excuse, he opens a postal packet which he knows or reasonably suspects has been incorrectly delivered to him.
www.legislation.gov.uk › part
Cross Heading: Offences of interfering with the mail - Postal Services Act 2000

Reasonable excuse
Could be concern about bailiffs coming and removing their tv

Move out
Live your own life
Move area

How old are your children? In your first post I thought they were 1 and 2 but now understand that probably just means 1st and 2nd. But your youngest is only 11 months so that's only one in school - how old is he?
I do understand that opening your mail is awful and inappropriate and illegal. But honestly, living at home, not paying rent (I know you contribute to bills etc), not able to save enough to pay off your debts - I know you said your mum is happy with this situation but the vast majority of parents would not be and your stepdad must (understandably) be very frustrated.
The debt won't impact on your ability to find private rented accommodation (it might impact on your ability to afford the rent). I think you should move to a cheaper area - you only have one child of school age and presumably he is in early primary school so it won't affect him significantly plus other costs like nursery might be cheaper too - and start to become a self reliant adult...

If you're paying them a fair rent and paying for you and your children's proportion of the bills Then they're not financially subsidising you. But it doesn't seem like this is the case?

I can only imagine how furious my DS would be if I opened his post. I wouldn't dare.
I agree with another poster who said go paper free and make sure everything is online so they can't snoop.

Not unless they share a bank account.

source: I regularly review credit reports as part of my job

They are being unreasonable to open your mail, but you are unreasonable to not take responsibility for yourself and your children. I would be really unhappy if my DD had debt collection letters coming to my address, this can impact they credit file of everyone at the address. Have you ever lived away from your parents or have you continued to have children while still living at your parents house?

I don’t think people are reading the whole thread or what I’ve said. They don’t provide for me or help me financially

Of course they do! Without them, you'd be homeless.

I agree with this!
Tell them they are not topen your letters at all from now on.

I'd look to get them redirected too- A friend/Family member

My remark wasn't catty. I don't do 'catty'. Yours was snide.

To be a guarantor you have to prove you could pay rent if the renter defaults. How are they going to do that?

What they’re doing is illegal, but you are 27 with 2 children & still living with your mum?
If you don’t like it move out.
It sounds an awful situation.

@girlmom21 you seem to have misunderstood, I was just answering the posters question re how many children the OP has, I wasn't making any other point so there was no need for your catty remark. Being in debt doesn't automatically mean the parents can't act as a guarantor so it's a reasonable suggestion.

It is not unreasonable to expect your post to remain unopened.
I think you are unreasonable to be trying to stay in an area you can't afford, regardless of debt.
If you are only 27 now I'm assuming your children are in lower years primary school? A move to a different school would hardly be traumatic for them especially if it means you finally get a home of your own.

They are overstepping massively.
Re post can you get your letters redirected via Royal Mail service to a sibling or Friends house?

No impact? A bailiff knocking on the door has no impact? Having to prove what's yours, no impact?

It’s true that debt is linked to names but names are linked to addresses. I know this because my DM had a lodger who ran up debt and intimidating bailiffs kept coming to HER door demanding to know where he was and asking intrusive questions as though she was partly responsible/lying. They also said they would keep returning. This caused a lot of distress.

I also worked in a call centre during uni a good while back which financed white goods for Curry’s. Addresses with CCJs would get flagged for further investigation.

Nobody wants this kind of aggro. It’s unfair to put the DM in this situation.

@GCAcademic credit ratings are linked to names, not addresses.

Unless you share any financial accounts the OPs debt has NO impact on her parents. Bailiffs can only seize assets that they can prove belong to the debtor. And as she has debts of a couple of hundred and have set up a payment plan it’s is highly unlikely to happen.

OP, listen to the people saying it’s illegal. It might be concern but it might also be a lack of boundaries and a view that you’re a child and therefore it’s OK to pry.

Sounds like you need to have a sensible conversation with both of them, especially if you’re unable to move. You both need to agree a way of sharing a house and lives that works for both of you.

How long have you been living with your parents, @Lily9915 ? Have your children always lived there?

The situation sounds untenable. I doubt they'll stop opening your mail no matter what you say, so the only solution would be be to go paper free wrt bills, and prioritise paying off the debts asap so you can move out. Whether your mother wants you to stay is neither here nor there. Your relationship with your parents may improve when you can put a bit of physical distance between you all

@LovedFedAndNoonesDead I just asked the question? If she's still in so much debt and hasn't saved whilst living with her parents (and she should already be claiming UC just not the rent element) then she's going to struggle when she moves out.

YANBU - I live with my parents (also moved in due to a break up and I will move out in the next few months but we love living together) and the only time they’ve opened my post is when I’ve actively asked them to e.g. medical ones that have arrived when I’ve been out. They would never invade my privacy.
I had a small amount of debt which I was able to pay off from living with them and saving. I can understand why your mum wants to know about your financial situation if she’s sort of paying for you in any way but opening post is wrong.

Presumably the OP would, like millions of others, be able to claim UC including personal allowance, 2 children and rent elements (which she can’t while living at parents home unless
shes also on the tenancy!) and then have a deduction for wages earned. The amount she’d receive would go towards rent, council tax and other bills and then wages would go towards food, other expenses and towards debts!!