27 years old, parents opening my post

Time to get your list diverted to a PO Box or similar.

Oh yeah @Lily9915 as others have said, what about a PO Box number? Then you can collect your mail from the sorting office.

Completely out of order. You do need to get your own place really soon. Is private let not an option? No WAY would I tolerate this. Not very helpful sorry. I hope things improve soon.

You need to speak with them as an adult. And remember you are in their home. You need to perhaps show you have taken responsibility for your situation and are working to resolve everything. Discuss your finances with them openly. They may have suggestions to help

Set up poste-restante - the post office keep your mail for you to collect.

www.postoffice.co.uk/mail/poste-restante

Alternatively have it redirected to another address, a friend or relative might be OK.

I've done a lot of debt counselling and you need to be paying more than the minimum. My advice is to set up the minimum for all then every month pay extra towards the one with the highest interest, it's very satisfying when one by one each is paid off.

Cut up any remaining credit cards and either in a notebook or on your phone, write down everything you buy by debit card so you keep track.

When trying to pay off debts it's tough to stay disciplined so work into your budget treats eg my advice is have a thermos cup, cafetière and make good coffee if you are a coffee fan -£1.50 (lidl) buys enough for 10-12 mugs, more expensive than instant but a lot cheaper than buying out. We have a flask we take out with us too

I am a bit on the fence.
If you are stuck at their house because of poor credit history, are you doing all you can to improve it? Will they help you?

No it's not acceptable but you have 2 kids and live with them, they still see you as a child consequently. Work on getting rid of those debts urgently then you are in a place to start afresh.

If they don’t provide for you financially then you must have the money to afford something as you say you pay your way & are working.

I don't necessarily agree - paying say £500 to her mum vs. £1200 for a 2 bed flat plus council tax, water, gas and electric usage plus standing charge all yourself is a different kettle of fish.

That said, a single mum of 2 is probably entitled to some help if she is on one relatively low income and receives no maintenance.

They don’t provide for me or help me financially, the roof over my head which I’ve said I am grateful for is my childhood home

OF course they do. Without them agreeing to let you stay, you wouldn’t have a home! You are minimising what they do for you.

If you were about to move out but didn’t and your child is only 11 months, what’s actually happened with regards to your housing previously? When did you live our/have children/move in with your mother?

No, I wouldn’t like anyone opening my post, but then I wouldn’t really want my adult children living in my house getting into debt and having more children. You may need to move your child to a school in a more affordable area so you can move out and get a day of your own.

Clear your debs ASAP, go without if necessary. Living cheaply in your parents home is a massive opportunity to save money.

Bingo!

It’s not an offence. It’s only an offence if the post is opened with intent to defraud.

Dear god! Your post about reporting the matter to the Police was clearly twatty and hardly helpful. 🤦🏻‍♀️

The OP is 27 years old and living at her parent’s house with two young children. I’m not really surprised her mum opens the post when she knows her daughter is in debt. and doesn’t appear to have set up a repayment plan with her creditors. She’s probably dreading a visit from the Bailiffs and who can blame her?

The OP needs to prioritise sorting out her debts and moving out, rather than threaten her parents with a visit from the local constabulary, not that they’d be remotely interested.

I have read the thread - but you aren’t a child anymore and shouldn’t be using the excuse “it’s your childhood home” to still live with your mum & stepdad.
You are 27 and have 2 kids, if you don’t like them illegally opening your post, then move out.
It is that simple actually as if you have no home - you would be homeless with 2 children, therefore I believe you would get something from the council (although that probably depends on the area you’re in) but if not there are loads of private rentals you could get from rightmove etc you would just need a deposit saved, which is difficult when paying off debt - but doable if you plan to move out in a few months time.
If they don’t provide for you financially then you must have the money to afford something as you say you pay your way & are working.
I just don’t think you can complain about the invasion of privacy when still living in your childhood home at 27.

That’s horrible and illegal. I never opened any mail to my DC not even when they were children. Only if it said “parent or care of DC” did I open it.

Yeah sure, I might hand them their letter and hover to be nosy and ensure it’s not something they need help with. But that’s as far as I would go.

I don’t think they’ll listen to you so I would actually redirect my mail to a work address or a friends address until you move back out. There are also ghost mail companies where mail goes to them, they open and scan it and send it to you digitally the same day they receive it. They’re usually used by businesses but some do it for personal mail too. Your privacy is assured. I think they have packages as low as £19/yr.

I'm getting confused about the situation now. Your first post says you were due to move out but the situation broke down. And your youngest is 11 months. Have you had your children while still living at home?

How much would your rent and bills be in a home of your own? Is what you are paying less than that (deduct how much UC would contribute to your rent)?

I feel for you I really do - but you have to appreciate how disruptive having another adult and two kids in the house is surely?

Is asking your mother to make you homeless an option?

I can't believe how many people are defending your parents.

I can. We're probably about 4 posts from a cat's-bum-face and "Why did you have children if you can't afford them".

I would actually look into a short-term redirection - can you do this to a friend's house?

With regards to the living situation, rents are only going up and you're not going to get housed while you live with your mum, so I don't know what to suggest there.

So you're not paying rent. So they are financially subsidising you.

@Singlebutmarried I also review credit reports for work. Any address with a large volume of defaults, ccjs or bankruptcy will be flagged for further checks in our organisation.

Get a mail redirect to a po box.
www.royalmail.com/receiving/po-box

Your mum and step dad are out of order. From what you describe I can see no justification for what they're doing other than they're nosy fuckers and have no boundaries. It even sounds like your step dad is trying to get your mum to check your phone, it's all just awful. I hope you can get out as soon as you can.

Re the debt - are you able to consolidate it so that the interest payments aren't as high? Go to Citizens Advice or StepChange to see if you can clear it faster by bundling it all into one.