To not understand why double barrel surnames are so wrong/bizarre to some people?

So you started off making out this was a feminist issue, but now I think it’s clear it’s a class one - you’re annoyed some people don’t see your kid’s DB name as some marker of high status, but as more of an aspirational lower MC one.

I never mentioned your 4 week old! 😂

Flangelasashes Cantafford Thebillsthismonth
Flangelasashes Ontothe Lasttinofbeans
Flangelasashes Hadtosellthebaby Topayformefags

There you go. Putting people down who have no money or who cannot afford to put food on the table while you bleat on about how well off you are.

The post you reported where I called you a wannabe posh bird was deleted.

You've had it, OP, if not in the way those posters intended. Mercifully there are no laws here to say we can't call ourselves and our children what we like, but when a woman makes a different decision to that expected, sometimes other women take it as a personal affront.

Oh yes, it's an insight alright. As these threads usually are.

I take HUGE issue with people looking down on the poor of society. Takes a certain breed to do that.

Don't worry I wasn't "having a go" it just sprung into my mind that episode of friends that's all.

I think go for it use the Dr title, you've earned it ☺️

I'm not. It's a common response that when women stand aside from convention, even in as minor a sense as this, other women can get very testy about it and will immediately try to put them back into their box. In this spirit OP wrote: Absolutely fine if DB names aren't for you in your particular situation. But I was hoping for at least a bit of insight as to why it's such a problem when other people do it.

You've had it, OP, if not in the way those posters intended. Mercifully there are no laws here to say we can't call ourselves and our children what we like, but when a woman makes a different decision to that expected, sometimes other women take it as a personal affront.

I personally couldn't give a shiny shit what other women call themselves and their kids. But I am pig-sick of being informed I have no ownership over my name, nor autonomy over my identity, or that a child should have its father's name, or DC and I 'rechristened' with the imaginary moniker someone else thinks we ought to be called.

As to the 'nobody cares' point, people clearly do. They're invested. And I don't blame them. Then things really do get personal, especially toward the ones who don't bow to convention (cf. the selection of catty, spiteful DB 'creations' above).

Pathetic.

Ha ha All you have done there my dear is cement my point. Absolutely mortified for you.

Clunky not chunky. But in my experience I've seen the likes of

Williams-Protheroe
Thomas-Williams
Smitham-Douglas

Not actual names, but you get 2 syllable surnames or more in each half.

And for those that I knew growing up where it was;

Louise Helen Thomas Williams

So no hyphen they are now known as simply Louise Williams professionally they don't use the first "surname"

@CarsonViolet
I think most people in the U.K. find double barrelled names pretentious, comical, and/or if recently concocted, ostentatious and (gasp) aspirational, perhaps all of the above. They’ve been viewed this way for a long time. A very long time. Call your kid what you want, but just as with all the mn threads about people who want to call their kid Jaxyn or Shardonne, you should know that your kid will be judged by it. To what degree, I don’t know, but the cultural baggage of a double barrelled name is not going to disappear any time soon.

I’m so surprised at the vitriol from people who haven’t double barrelled their names…. so strange to have such an angry reaction? I’m baffled.

Not sure why people think you are pretentious using an academic title you gained through hard work. I suppose they don't realise that people like medical doctors, vets and dentists while they are allowed to use it, it is a courtesy title.

OP I feel your pain and have had trouble from the ILs too (not from my own parents who presumably were pleased that their name was passed on to the DGCs)
My take on this is that parents of men are worried by this, DP was an only child and they were worried that 'DP surname' will die out, he will be the last one...never mind that the DGCs all HAVE his surname....and mine too. They also could not cope with me not changing my name and would send cards to ' Ms X his surname-my surname ' and as my DD has the same initial as me that just looks like it's intended for her!
It's crazy how much fuss people can make about simply either not doing something, or finding a logical solution to a problem,.
Patriarchy is definitely at the root of this.

I can’t understand why it’s pretentious?! Such a weird accusation!

So Rees-Mogg is chunky and long compared to Thomasson?

Lots of people with double barrelled names have one very common and short name that is widely used in the UK e.g. Rees, Smith, Jones, Box, Hill

I've got friends with common names - some short, others not - who have been caught out by being mixed up with someone else. Shitty if you are depending on being paid that month.

Oh I never introduce myself as Dr Dirt, it's just for forms. But then I wouldn't introduce myself as Ms Dirt either, just as Dues Dirt.

I read an American novel recently, in which the protagonists talked to and about each other as 'Dr X', 'Dr Y'. I thought, do people really do that? No-one I know does.

That's convenient.

But let's assume you're telling the truth. Why, having read all these posts, were you moved to tell us that nobody cares even though you've been furnished with examples of people who clearly do?

I'm so sorry but you've just reminded me of that episode of Friends when Ross introduced himself in the hospital as Dr Geller and Rachel tells him not to "because that means something here" 😂