To think 2 is easier than 1?

I found this, 17 month age gap. The age where they both ran in opposite directions was tricky (so 1&2/2&3 really) but for the most part it's been great.

My mum gave me some bullshit about the younger one sleeping better because they got tired watching the older one run about, I remember laughing at this advice at the time, but I did find it easier as I had some experience of babies unlike the first time where it was all terrifyingly new.

I definitely struggled much more going from 0-1 than 1-2.
Teens now and still ok.

Also funny reading my comment back. I've now got DS1 who is almost six, DS2 who is three and a half, and baby DS3!

The two older ones play together a lot now and share a bedroom out of choice, so it's easier than having one in the sense that they entertain each other and I can probably leave them playing for longer than I could with one. They are both at school/preschool (one single drop-off!) during the week which means I get time with the baby, and looking after a baby third time round is much easier and more enjoyable than the anxious time I had as a first time mum.* *

That said, if someone gets ill or there's another kind of hiccup that means we can't follow our normal routine then it's pretty much unmitigated chaos. I love it though, and have a lovely feeling that my family is complete now.

I went for a third child (wrote my post when at the end of mat leave with number 2) - she's 1.5 now - no regrets!

It’s so funny reading my comment from September 2022 back, I can’t remember all of the exhaustion! (Well, I can, but it doesn’t feel real). 2 under 2 was a killer that first year.

They're now 5 and 3.5. Life is really good. They do fight like cat and dog at times but that’s generally because the youngest has some issues around kind hands and sharing (which we are working on). They say ‘I love you’ to each other every day though (which melts my heart) and they definitely get along more and more as they get older.

I also cackled at my response to @mistermagpie as after all that we are now weighing up the third child I so stridently ruled out upthread 3 years ago!

Can I ask how you're getting on these days? - kind regards for a soon to be mom of 2

Mine are not tiny anymore, it seems so quiet when one isn't here. Doesn't matter which one. I have 3. I think mine are super easy ATM - 9, 10 and 15. Not so much at 1, 2.5 and 6!

Yesss 2 is so much easier

3yo DS NOT 380 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣.

I commented on here when I was pregnant with twins.

I've had my twins since and they're 4 months old.

It was actually very easy transition from 1-3. 380 DS has taken it all in his stride and my twins are good sleepers and very content! I know I'm lucky to find the transition from 1-3 a breeze!

I find two much easier than one. Sometimes when I have only one home after school I go and get the other one from nursery early.

If I have one at home, they want all my attention and I get nothing else done.

If I have two at home, they entertain each other for hours and I can get work or chores done in relative peace.

I don’t think it’s easier because there’s more of them but it’s proportionally easier if that makes sense? If DD was 100% then when DD arrived I’d says it’s 150% to 175%. I was more relaxed and able to not be so obsessive about being a parent. I think it’s partly because you have to look after both so the second one gets left to fend for itself a bit more…gosh, that sounds awful 😂

All children are different, and just bcos it’s easy now doesn’t mean it will b when they r older, and those who have a hard time when they r younger have it easier when they r older.

1 to 2 was harder work physically for the first year but still fun as long as I gave myself over to it being that way. Then it was a lot easier.

The 4 year age gap helped, I found, as DC1 could verbalise any feelings of jealousy which wasn’t that much of a problem as she felt very involved and did accept new baby’s needs where I was concerned, whereas, for example, if DP came in from work and held the baby straight away to let me do something, DC1 would get jealous so we worked around that

Not the case for me at all, I loved having DD and have found it so much harder since having DS who is now 2. Can't ever give them both what they need, different stages, he has a death wish so DD doesn't get the time she'd like doing quieter things etc. hoping it will improve when he's older

I was actually pleasantly surprised at how well I felt I was managing with a new baby and a 15 month old.. this lasted until the new baby started moving/walking and then it was a totally different ball game. Two of them going in opposite directions doing things they shouldn't be 🤯 might be interesting to see how you find things when your 7 month old is on the move..

I don’t mind people that shout those things and leave. It’s the people who want to have an in-depth conversation about them that I lose patience for. The ones I want to punch in the face are the “I wish I’d had twins!!!” brigade. They can fuck right off.

@mistermagpie I think I love you - I really needed to read that tonight. Thank you. I’m in awe you went for the third though, I can’t imagine ever doing this again!!

Yep, I totally get this too. I found it quite hard going from no kids to one but number two slotted in. We're a little gang and the kids are playmates. I think I'm more relaxed in my identity as a mum too, I find it easier to strike up conversations at the playground and we always bump into at least one of their friends. I don't sweat the small stuff when they're going through stages as I don't have time.
Having said that my house is a mess, I find it hard to balance family life and work and I'm knackered.. But happy.

There are 17 months between my two.
In the first 6 months of having two, it was absolute hell but the older they got, the easier it got.
Now they're 3 and 4 and it's soooo much easier with both of them as they keep each other entertained.
If one of them is home without the other, it's so much harder as they want 100% of my attention so it's harder to get stuff done around the house.

If one to two is hard, I can tell you one to three is killing me 😂😭

@ReeseWitherfork I know and do you ever want to say please shut the f*ck up to them? 😄

(someone may have already said this)
But surely this is massively influenced by a global pandemic?!
If you have a 3 year old, then at some point during her baby years there was lockdown/no childcare/no playgroups or parks open...or otherwise your partner may have been working out of the house then and now is at home more?!
Or it could be the other way round for you and/or others... But given the massive changes we've seen over the past few years it's not a fair comparison at all!

It's gets better, I promise. There are 20 months between my two oldest children and I was exactly where you are. The younger of the two was a terrible baby and honestly, it was awful for the first year.

They are 5 and 7 now and I have barely seen them this weekend, they are off up in their room playing Lego and making up games and just talking absolute rubbish all day long. They have always been good mates but since the younger one started school they have become even closer and they basically entertain each other and we do nothing!

I also have a younger child and I'm hoping she fits in with them eventually but even if she doesn't, their relationship is one of the joys of my life. It's worth it, honestly it is.

But I totally get how you are feeling now, it's a long old struggle.