"Men are only as faithful as their options"

Yes, but they also literally have less of their brain devoted to sex and sexual pursuit.

And affairs are no guarantee of good sex. Nothingnis, other than wading through multiple partners til you find one who's objectively good and a good match for you.

This is also why I have a theory (that seems correct) that beautiful women are cheated on more than average/not attractive women. Beautiful women by default attract men who value women for looks.

I also think a lot of men are intimidated by beautiful women; therefore the cocky, narc, sociopathic, high risk taking men approach and get involved with them; and then treat them according to their narc, sociopathic, arrogant characters.

Women don't value sex because it's so easily attainable.

They do value good sex though which is less easily attainable and that's where affairs come in.

I agree, women think men think about them in the sane way as the reverse; but in many cases, it's not true- they barely see women as people, they see them as fulfilling function s and roles, they see them as relatively interchangeable and disposable

I should add, in my experience, they also see them (and talk about them) as a collection of body parts and a hair colour.

Women on average aren't as sex oriented as men.

And are more risk averse than men.

Then there's the typical "the wife".

The "the" reveals the objectification and "person who fulfills a role attitude.

Well, to be fair - Adam Levine is an absolute and total douchebag. Complete twat.
Always was.
The term douchebag could have been solely designed for him and it should have a photofit of his face along with the definition in dictionaries.

His wife comes across as funny, personable, bubbly, nice and she seems devoted to her children and him.
To be honest - she could have done better. I don't know what she saw in him.
She's pregnant at the moment with their third child and what is she supposed to do now.
I think she should divorce him but I wouldn't be surprised if she stays. Her kids are so, so young and that might be the decider.

I would never have trusted him. He was cheated before and more than once.
I'm always highly suspicious of these grandiose declarations of - "my wife is so fuckin' awesome!!!!!" by these d-bag men.
Those fuckers are always the ones who are cheating left, right and centre.
He has to have been shagging that Sumner Stohr one. No way was that just an emotional affair. And I'll be amazed if she's the only one he's shagged.
He is indeed a wanker.

I saw one on a male dominated forum fefer to his partner as "the female thingy" recently.

I agree, women think men think about them in the sane way as the reverse; but in many cases, it's not true- they barely see women as people, they see them as fulfilling function s and roles, they see them as relatively interchangeable and disposable.

I think there was a study that reported that a large percentage of men couldn't say what (or who) their wife's job title, real hair colour, or closes friend was.

Same as women then OP.

Or frigid.

Is anyone truly frigid?

The a priori/posteriori discussion between @Pinktoothbrushesarefab and @AllAloneInThisHouse aside, they are probably part of the subculture of men who believe women to be intrinsically intellectually and ethically inferior and they take, use, and abuse the ones who in their eyes put themselves on show, literally flaunting their bodies down a runway, for them, to then go and woo to keep as a wife for breeding, around ten years their junior, if being conservative.

Could it be that some men have watched porn where beautiful women are disrespected and abused (and appear to like it) so regard women as two dimensional and disposable ?

They don’t need porn for that.
Porn shows us exactly how men feel aboit women.
Men have always dehumanized women, that’s why cheating is easy for them - they don’t see women as someting meaningfull.

@macthekwife "I think it's about respect. It appears that men who date and marry models don't oftentimes respect them, for whatever reason. They always seem to be obsessed with models, marry models, and cheat with models."

This is an interesting point.

Could it be that some men have watched porn where beautiful women are disrespected and abused (and appear to like it) so regard women as two dimensional and disposable ?

I think it's up to us women to raise our sons to respect women, although with all the outside influences on them, that can be difficult.

I know one thing about my husband. His values are family. He cares about his reputation with his wider family and his children. And if he were to try to "swap" me his reputation and the respect from our wider family and children would be horribly compromised, same for myself.

Therefore, he has very little incentive to do such a thing. His life would hardly be better given his values are around family and reputation.

For this reason I don't worry about him cheating, and even if he did the support network I would have would be so immense I know I would be okay.

I think it's about respect. It appears that men who date and marry models don't oftentimes respect them, for whatever reason. They always seem to be obsessed with models, marry models, and cheat with models.

Most women can get sex any time anywhere. Either on a dating app or just walking into a bar. Most men have to put a lot of work in to 'get sex' with a woman they aren't in a relationship with.

Thus it's an unusual occurrence for most men when a situation invites itself when they haven't had to put the effort in.

A lot of 'OW' are married or in serious relationships themselves, and therefore cheating on their own partner.

There's not a large bank of single women out there who are happy to be 'OW' for older married men. It's different for 'famous men, of course, especially those deemed 'hot', but your average Alan isn't going to have his pick of single ladies.

😂😂😂 brilliant ! however they don’t always turn up and let you see they are a cunt ! It would make life a lot easier if they did

This made me so sad to read this. Obviously I can’t see you but don’t you think in our society men are allowed to get old but women are demonised for it? That a man with grey hair and a few wrinkles is a Silver fox but a woman is expected to do everything she can to look younger ? TV and media are a lot to blame as there are hardly any older female newsreaders or presenters and if they are about they look very young for their age or have had work done. Obviously everyone says Helen Mirren when you mention the lack of older women in film etc but she’s an exception and someone that looks younger and obviously works very hard to “keep” her figure. I try to look my best, I’m in my 50s but we shouldn’t have to try to look ten years younger to be valued. Men do not have the same pressures put on them regarding ageing. Your husband is not just with you for how you look he loves you as a person.

@Fatballs
"It doesn’t need to be “High” Anglican. Common or garden Anglican churches run marriage preparation courses too.
I know because I attended one."

Thanks for that info.
I stand corrected.

The Catholic Church and some 'High' Anglican Churches hold marriage preparation classes for young couples.

It doesn’t need to be “High” Anglican. Common or garden Anglican churches run marriage preparation courses too.

I know because I attended one.

OP, to say "Men are only as faithful as their options" is hugely insulting to all the faithful men out there.

Having said that there is no sure-fire way to stop a man cheating (unless you chain him up in the shed and just let him out for meals 😀) So I would advise any young woman considering marriage to make sure you have good earning potential, some savings and a good independent support network beforehand.

The Catholic Church and some 'High' Anglican Churches hold marriage preparation classes for young couples.
These cover such topics as :-
Spirituality/faith
Conflict resolution skills
Careers
Finances
Intimacy/cohabitation
Children
Commitment

This gives engaged couples the chance to find out where they are 'on the same page' and where they are not, and how it can be improved. It's a chance to iron out any minor problems before they develop into a real big issue.
It also throws up potential areas of incompatibility, and I've known some couples break off an engagement after completing the course.

Well, you never know! 😉

you think cheating on a spouse is a modern phenomenon?

how quaint.

I know I'm not a cheat because I've been presented numerous times with the opportunity and chosen not to exercise it. I work away a lot, go to conferences a lot, work in male-dominated fields, and have also found colleagues attractive and would have, if not married, definitely gone there. I just take myself out of the situation actively as a conscious choice, sometimes a bit regretfully but knowing what I have is so much more.

I think my husband did the same, although I don't think he was as tempted as me! No idea why.

One thing that might have made a difference to us is that both our fathers are/were unfaithful and had more than one affair, so had a strong motivation not to repeat this endless cycle of faithlessness and destruction (and waiting for other children to pop up at funerals).

That said you could never say never. I can say unlikely though.