Porn culture has led to women suffering injuries during sex

I don't think the posters I were referring to were coerced. Indeed I have repeatedly said that I have no doubt some women do enjoy sticking things up their arse and certainly seem to be awfully proud of it.

My issue is those cool girls, pick me, not like other girls, aren't I special women are normalising an objectively harmful sex act.

And why? Why do they want the world to know that they like things being stuck in their bum? Why do they want to partcipate in normalising it? To be the cool girl is the only answer I can come up with.

I don't think raging at people whose perception is different is going to help anyone move forward.
If we want to unpick what to do about changing a situation that everyone on this thread agrees is a problem- people having anal sex who are insufficiently prepared and informed and being damaging- then we need a calm conversation where we listen to other people's experience.

If you accuse people of being irresponsible and selfish- but in much harsher terms- they are going to be defensive.

No one changes their mind when they are defensive.

@DillonPanthersTexas thank you!

@ProfessorFusspot I agree!

It’s interesting…I posted on this in the sex board first thing this morning- before this. Most of those replies told me that women do enjoy it and that the risks are negligible increased vs risk for child birth 🤔
clearly a different type of women on that board to majority of replies here 🤣

Pleased to see I called what would happen on page 1!
It baffles me that so many posters think their personal love of anal negates the harmful effects of the pro-anal pornified culture on physical and emotional health, particularly of young girls.

The article from OP aligns with many others suggesting anal inherently carries risk and can result in lasting effects.

bmjopen.bmj.com/content/4/8/e004996

And to the person working in sexual health who said that vaginally sex is also risky - you are having a laugh. Vaginas are sex organs, evolved to allow humans to have sex. There is no comparison with an anus which evolved for shifting. Sometimes vaginal sex will result in injury but very uncommon compared to anal sex. And vaginas heal well from quite extreme trauma, as many women with children will tell you.

Just because you enjoy it and want it to be harmless, doesn't mean it is harmless.

Things like

Sticking things up your arse
Brainwashed
Cool girl
Pathetic
Disgusting

Are not things you say to victims, women you believe are coerced into this act. It's truly disgraceful that women hide behind feminism, it takes me back to the days of slut shaming and bullying at secondary.

Posting links is helpful. Personal attacks are not, least of all to women you believe to be exploited.

Sure, I'm the triggered one.

Do not feel shamed. This poster is trying to make us feel that way by projecting it. Yes, porn probably plays into why “some” women feel like they should do it. All we are trying to say is we haven’t been coerced and never had it forced upon us (thankfully) but that we enjoy it. It details her “thinking” of its all because of porn and how dare we say we enjoy it. Never feel ashamed or dirty of your sexual preference. I’m very open and honest about my sex life and happy to talk about it. I wouldn’t just go up to people and start talking about it but nowadays people are more open to talking about sex. That’s only a good thing to me.

@picklemewalnuts ha ha that made me chuckle. I'm actually quiet lazy. The toy does all the work! Lol

The problem is MEN thinking that porn is the norm
But the other half of the problem is WOMEN not speaking up for themselves. Learn to say no ffs.

@Miffee you seem very triggered by me. I am not saying I am special- in fact I've said many times that many heterosexual couples have and enjoy anal. I also am not trying to "not be like other girls". I am just saying some people enjoy it, genuinely. Some don't. Amazingly we're all different!

Someone upthread I think hit the nail in the head with reference to us being biologically repulsed by faeces.

during my “cool girl” era, I managed to convince a man to use a dildo on him. Then had a realisation of “wtf? This is disgusting”.

swimming in the sea is great - but nobody wants to swim by the sewage outlet pipe just because it’s a bit warmer! 😂

No, feminism is working to liberate women from sex based oppression.

Normalising sex acts that cause large scale harm to women and girls is objectively bad and something you should be ashamed of.

Would you be talking like this if you enjoyed being strangled? Would you encourage your daughter to do it?

Oh God I feel ill now 🤢

Why are you to trying to shame me and make me feel dirty ? Isn't that anti feminist and trying to control women's bodies ? I never told anyone else to do it. I just shared that I enjoyed it.

I’m pretty sure that anal sex is the cause of my “IBS” I just don’t feel right down there it’s very much like something has changed physically.
I wasn’t pressured to do it by my partner but I do think I probably felt a slight expectation to be fun/dirty whatever when we met as he was younger than me.
Its good to see this article as I have gay friends and I’ve always wondered how they can do this on a regular basis with no issues yet I think I’m now damaged

I was more aware of @ChocolateCakeYum

No. Putting your 'discomfort" at not being able to talk about loving to stick things up your arse above the real harm it does to women and girls is anti feminist.

And I don’t think men and boys are bad and do this on purpose. I think it is all the influence of toxic masculinity on peer groups and opportunism.

Sadly I’ve known some very lovely, kind boys who have stupidly done things in the moment because they thought it was what was expected/ an open opportunity. I don’t think they are bad people just led astray by unrealistic porn expectations. It led to one of them being bullied out of his school and the girl going off the rails with the trauma of the backlash.

To be fair, pregnancy and childbirth increase the risk of fecal incontinence.
The softening of muscles and tissues during periods and pregnancy increases the risk of injury.

So enjoying any anal stimulation rarely even on your own is anti feminist 🤣. Wow

I chose it yesterday. How is that relevant? And I'm not pro anything just anti weirdos who are ironically misogynistic. The risks are real, doesn't mean you have to be a twat.

"But I love it and its normal! Sometimes I even stick stuff up my bumper when I am eating a cake because it improves the taste!"- Some poster in a minute probably

I too would be interested in how that sample set for the survey that produced 25% of heterosexual couples regularly engage in anal was chosen.

I would also like to know how it overlays with coercive control in relationships.

And I’d also like to see a society that recognised that the majority of girls have suffered from at least one traumatising sexual experience by the time they reach adulthood. Mainly at the hands of young men who have been indoctrinated by porn culture. When you are young, naive and eager to please it is easy to convince you to do anything but that is not the same as full consent.