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Original poster

Prom Dress Disaster

311 replies

Promdisaster · 08/07/2022 09:27

Sorry, this might be long as to not drip feed. Apologies but could really do with some advice.

Ordered a prom dress for my daughter. Paid around one third deposit. Dress arrived in the shop the week before prom date. Went to try on and collect, but dress was too big. Seamstress made some alterations and said it would be done in time, they were working through alterations in order of prom date and to keep an eye out for an email.

Around lunchtime the day before prom, I got a text from the prom shop saying they were delivering the dresses and asking what was the latest time they could deliver that night or from what time the next morning, so I said up to 10.30pm and from 6.30am next morning.

Got a text early the next morning saying the seamstress had collapsed overnight and gone into hospital and they were trying to find another seamstress but not to worry, the dress would be there ASAP.

I told them I needed the dress by 4pm latest as daughter was having friends round to get ready/photos, then being picked up by another mum to go to a pre prom party/photos before leaving at 6pm to go to the prom.

Eventually, after a couple of messages and a phone call, the prom lady turns up with dress at 5pm. She asked my daughter to try the dress on to make sure it fitted. I was more worried that the dress would be too small now that it had been altered, so when she got it on and it wasn't too small I said it was fine and I could tighten it in with the corset . We were so relieved she had a dress. At that moment the other mum turned up to take them to the preprom party so the prom lady left.

The mum at the preprom party messaged and said the dress was too big and she had tried to pin it in but the dress was still gaping round the chest area and too big round the waist. My daughter spent the whole night miserable in a dress that was too big and is sad when she sees all the photos of the girls looking beautiful in their lovely prom dresses. My daughter is not a promzilla is is the sweetest laid back girl.

I have now had a phone message and an email asking for the balance. I really feel that I dont want to pay for a dress that doesn't fit and ruined my daughter's evening. I want to give the dress back so they can resell it.

IABU - yes the dress was worn
IANBU - it wasn't my fault, the dress didn't fit.

OP posts:
dianthus101 · 08/07/2022 13:20

I think you probably have to pay something but certainly not the full price. The fact that it arrived last minute meant it was too late to alter the dress and also too late to buy another one.

bloodyunicorns · 08/07/2022 13:17

You should have made sure it fitted when the prom dress lady brought it to you! Much better that than sending your dd off to get ready elsewhere...

I'm not sure where you stand legally. You could try to sell the dress back to the shop, but you did accept it and your dd wore it.

But the shop didn't fulfill their side of the contract - dress was wrong size and delivered too late. I agree they took on too much and couldn't cope.

I don't know why you couldn't have seen that it would be too big if she had to hold it up all eve to stop it falling down, though...

sunglassesonthetable · 08/07/2022 13:17

You said it was fine. You'll have to pay.

Luckily OP has read the whole thread.

Toddlerteaplease · 08/07/2022 13:15

You said it was fine. You'll have to pay.

sunglassesonthetable · 08/07/2022 13:14

At least a suit is an investment and he will be able to wear multiple times in the future!

Hmm, my son had grown another 2" and put on about 2 stone in the gym before his prom suit ever got worn again.

P205 · 08/07/2022 13:12

I assume the dress was expensive. The OP should have taken her time and had her daughter try it on properly. She paid for the service after all.

From the point of view of the shop, they did the work and the OP accepted the dress and said it fitted. It’s a bit cheeky to turn around after the event and say actually…

SeemsSoUnfair · 08/07/2022 13:11

WimbyAce · 08/07/2022 09:54

Nothing useful to say just dreading all this prom stuff when my kids are older. When did it become a thing?

Now I know why my DSIL had nieces prom dress bought, altered and hanging in the wardrobe since Easter! Baring in mind it is both prom season and wedding season, therefore seamstresses will be in very high demand, so prepare much much further in advance than you think you will need to seems to be the answer.

ds's girlfriend is pretty chilled about these things and ordered a simple black floor length dress 3 weeks 😮 before prom (don't now where she got it, but it was a bit like this but the skirt less full), it was slightly too big so she just used safety pins (brave girl!) to adjust 🤣, no fake tan, no professional hair, make up, nails or lashes and she looked absolutely stunning!

These things are as easy/hard as you want to make them, or as much as you/your dc feel they want/need to conform to the prom pressure. I had a harder time finding a 3 piece suit ds was happy with and didn't make him look like an old business man, then getting it altered to fit his awkward shape. At least a suit is an investment and he will be able to wear multiple times in the future!

sunglassesonthetable · 08/07/2022 13:07

From their pov, you agreed a delivery timescale. You accepted the dress, saw your DD in it, told them it was fine. Your DD wore the dress, went to the prom and now you're saying the dress was a disaster and you don't want to pay for it.

From the shops POV they had a nightmare week. Way too many dresses to alter.Up all night sewing. Phone ringing off the hook . OP was very restrained- I bet some weren't) ( Possibly the seamstress'collapsing' etc ) Emailing and ringing customers putting them off. Everyone stressed. Literally driving round town late at the last minute flinging the dresses in. stressed Mums and promzillas ( joke ) at every drop off. Everything crossed that dresses were fitting....

Believe me OP the shop knows it was shit. They were there.

PrivateHall · 08/07/2022 13:06

Does it matter why dd chose a dress that didn't fit? The shop said they can alter it, so it should have been ok. Not much blaming op and dd for choosing this dress, what a ridiculous comment.

babyjellyfish · 08/07/2022 13:06

Yeah I think it was a lot easier back in the day when you just went to Monsoon or Debenhams with your mum and picked something off the hanger.

There's so much pressure these days.

Dixiechickonhols · 08/07/2022 13:01

misteek · 08/07/2022 12:43

i dont understand why you didnt just buy a dress that fitted your daughter in the first place 1

Prom dresses are usually ordered in. You try on a sample then they order and alter to fit. There's been a huge issue this year as lots come from overseas and some have taken ages/not arrived. My DD actually chose a bridesmaid dress which came in a size 10 as standard then it was taken in (twice) to fit her. They don't sell them in size 4.6.8.10 like normal dresses.
It was a whole new experience. I bought my wedding dress from monsoon and never been a bridesmaid so hadn't been through it before.

Original poster
Promdisaster · 08/07/2022 12:57

@misteek
I don't understand what you mean? We went into the prom shop, tried on some dresses and ordered the one she liked in her size. When we went to collect, DD tried it on and it was too big, so seamstress put pins in where alterations were to be made.

I don't know about where you live, but in our local town there are only 3 clothes shops, none of which sell anything remotely suitable for a prom, so I would have had to order online anyway! It's not as simple as buying one off the shelf!

OP posts:
PrivateHall · 08/07/2022 12:55

The seamstress (apparently) 'collapsing' simply highlights why such jobs shouldn't be left til the last minute. Do you think they just didn't bother altering it at all? To those saying op should have realised the issue when dd tried it on - what other option did dd have at that point but to wear the dress anyway?

I would definitely be emailing a complaint to them and see what they suggest. I don't think you can expect a full refund as dd did wear it so they can't resell it as new - but certainly there should be no charge for the alterations and delivery.

GoldenSongbird · 08/07/2022 12:54

I agree with the PP who said you could negotiate on not paying for the alterations but you have to pay for the dress. Tbh you agreed to timescales that were too tight and because of that they left you till last. Then you agreed the dress was fine. If your priority was that the dress fitted properly then you should have made sure it did.
From their pov, you agreed a delivery timescale. You accepted the dress, saw your DD in it, told them it was fine. Your DD wore the dress, went to the prom and now you're saying the dress was a disaster and you don't want to pay for it.

sohosoho · 08/07/2022 12:53

I'm wondering if 'collapsed' is the new somebody's died 😁

sunglassesonthetable · 08/07/2022 12:48

i dont understand why you didnt just buy a dress that fitted your daughter in the first place 1

ah that life with a teenager was so simple......

misteek · 08/07/2022 12:43

i dont understand why you didnt just buy a dress that fitted your daughter in the first place 1

OldFan · 08/07/2022 12:39

YANBU. Even if the seamstress was ill, it meant you didn't get the quality of product you paid for so shouldn't have to pay the full price when you didn't get it to the standard it was supposed to be.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 08/07/2022 12:34

Got a text ... saying the seamstress had collapsed overnight

Yeah, right Hmm

Some excellent suggestions for the email already, but don't expect it to make much difference. There's no way I'd be paying more, and the only thing they can really do is sue you - but I doubt they'll do that and risk the publicity

babyjellyfish · 08/07/2022 12:29

hedgehoglurker · 08/07/2022 09:39

Yabu. You accepted the dress after trying it on. Your daughter then wore it all evening. Like Judge Judy would say, "you ate the steak".

What else were they going to do, an hour before the prom?

YouBelongHere · 08/07/2022 12:29

listsandbudgets · 08/07/2022 10:34

OP I really sympathise and I'm sorry your DD felt so self conscious all evening.

DD's prom dress was a bit crumpled so we took it to be professionally steamed... picked it up the day before the prom and they had burnt it right in the middle of the chest! Not possible to wear it - far too obvious. They offered to dry clean it to try to get it out but we'd not have been able to pick up until the day after prom.

Finally went shopping and managed to get something pretty. Not exactly what she had envisaged though. I just gritted my teeth and was grateful I had some savings. I think lady in shop felt sorry for her - sobbing teen on day of prom itself - because she told us it was end of line and applied a huge discount thank goodness. She also produced a very pretty hair clip and threw it in.

Now in massive argument with ironing shop which is likely to end up in small courts claim.. Prom seems to be so important and the dress even more so Grin

So glad your daughter's prom dress got sorted, how stressful for her :(

I still remember my Mum getting me a lovely second-hand prom dress but because it had been used some of the gems on the front had fallen off so she took it to a seamstress to readd them and also add a few more to make it a bit 'glitzier'. They said it would be done on the day (we dropped it quite a few weeks beforehand and it wasn't a major job) so we picked it up and not only did it look like they'd done the bare minimum with the gems they pointed out a rip we hadn't noticed at the bottom and were like 'we noticed this, weren't sure if you wanted us to do anything?' 😕They had our contact details so why did they wait until we were literally picking it up on the prom day? Luckily it wasn't that noticeable!

OP YANBU to at the very least express how disappointed you are and just see what they say. Even if the dress had fit perfectly it must've been very stressful for you and your daughter to be left waiting until after the very latest you had requested it be delivered!

Original poster
Promdisaster · 08/07/2022 12:24

Thank you for all your helpful comments good and bad. I'm just taking my DM out for a birthday lunch then I'll compose an email to prom shop this afternoon.

OP posts:
Rosehugger · 08/07/2022 12:16

Or indeed if you use the sofa and the arm falls off after a week. The shop can't say OH BUT YOU USED IT. That's not the point @mam0918

sunglassesonthetable · 08/07/2022 12:14

In this situation, delivered ridiculously late, put under pressure by the shop keeper who wanted to leave , having no alternative -

And therefore not delivered in a timely and appropriate manner -

don't think saying " it's fine" is the magic bullet for the shopkeeper, some posters seem to think it is.

@Rosehugger has explained it well.

Rosehugger · 08/07/2022 12:14

Quite.