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Original poster

In thinking that Red Dwarf is still creasingly funny?

214 replies

Needhelp101 · 02/07/2022 09:22

For some reason, I started re-watching Red Dwarf last night (it's available on Now). It's still SO funny.

There was a scene between Lister and Rimmer in 'Marooned' as they were discussing losing their virginity which honestly approaches comic genius. Every time I thought the punchline was there, another one followed.

For context, Lister had said he lost his virginity 'in the ninth hole of the Bootle municipal golf course'

Lister (wistfully): She just took all her clothes off and stood in front of me, completely naked. I was so excited, I almost dropped me skateboard.
Rimmer: SKATEBOARD? How old were you?
Lister: Twelve
Rimmer: TWELVE? You lost your virginity when you were twelve?
Lister: Yeah
Rimmer: Twelve?
Lister: Yeah
Rimmer (aghast): Twelve? You were twelve?
Lister: Yeah
Silence...
Rimmer: You can't have been a full member of the golf course then.

And later
Lister: Are you saying I've got a big bum?
Rimmer: Big? It's like two badly parked Volkswagons 😁

Anyone else a fan?

OP posts:
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InTheNightWeWillWish · 02/07/2022 13:53

‘What do you mean you killed him cha cha cha?’

Alexa will play Spare Core Directives for you if you ask her.

StarlingsInTheRoof · 02/07/2022 13:46

Every time I hear "enjoy your meal" I fill in "I will" in the cat's voice.

Kryten meeting the GELF's and going in for a handshake is one of the funniest pieces of physical comedy ever.

I pretend only series 1-6 exist as it all went wrong after that. Even though I think it improved again, I just want the great memories. Got a Mr Flibble in the loft somewhere!

RhubarbFairy · 02/07/2022 13:31

I was only thinking of the Camille episode yesterday as I was driving and was chuckling to myself at the sheer genius of Cat's reveal.

newtb · 02/07/2022 13:30

I once worked for a company where we all loved it. There'd been a director who was a double of the cat's alter ego. Brillant.

Also, one saying we quoted was 'lager kills a vindaloo'. Classic

RhubarbFairy · 02/07/2022 13:24

Oh and DH and I met both DJJ and CB at a sci-fi convention round the corner from our house. They were literally the only reason we went.

We went when I was about 7 months pregnant with DS1 and met DJJ and then the following year with DS1 in arms. Met them both. DJJ remembered me and was lovely with DS. CB a little more stand offish. I do have a great photo of DH, DS and I with our friends and DJJ and CB.

DS1 is 11 now. Wondering if he's ready now?

ToffeeNotCoffee · 02/07/2022 13:23

The Cat wants his food so he demands fish and gives the vending machine a thump and a portion of fish appears. He repeats this until he's holding about six portions of the same meal.

The episode where Red Dwarf is on self destruct and they cannot over ride it despite their best efforts. When all hope is lost, they brace for impact.

What happens ? A chocolate bar is dispensed from the vending machine !

In 'Stasis Leak' Rimmer is trying to explain the space time continuum to the cat. Ultimately simplifies it to, 'it's a magic door.' The cat replies, why didn't you just say so !

It wasn't as funny after series four. Basically, when there was no more Holly hop drive either Norman Lovett or Hattie Hayridge.

Like a pp I preferred Claire Grogan as Kotchanski.

RhubarbFairy · 02/07/2022 13:13

The Winnie the Pooh scene almost killed me the first time I watched it and its still one of my favourite scenes in any show to date.

Until that point, I liked Red Dwarf (DH is a huge fan) and found it funny. But that scene tipped it for me. Craig Charles was superb in it.

'He's refusing the blindfold'. Chortling as I write this.

devildeepbluesea · 02/07/2022 13:12

Oooh thanks for reminding me how good this is! Next thing to introduce DD to I think.

BadgeronaMoped · 02/07/2022 13:11

Sorry if this one's been quoted already Grin DH and I often quote Red Dwarf to each other.

Lister: "Why can't we ever meet anyone NICE?"
Cat: "Why don't we ever meet anyone who can shoot straight?!"

TeaStory · 02/07/2022 13:08

”A metaphysical dichotomy has caused this unit to overload and shut down.”

Hawkins001 · 02/07/2022 13:06

It is a good show , just waiting for the new seasons as and when they make them

Vampirethriller · 02/07/2022 13:04

Sometimes I comb the dog's fringe forward and tell her she looks like Dwayne Dibley.

ticketstub · 02/07/2022 13:04

We still make reference to visiting Nodnol when we are going to London from that RD episode where everything was reversed.😀

flutterbybabycakes · 02/07/2022 13:01

Of course. it's brilliant. Also Brittas Empire. Chris Barrie is great so are all the others.

Womblesaremyfavouritefood · 02/07/2022 12:59

... and the 2 bags of flour as a gift ie flour, flowers. A later episode, but still very clever.

Womblesaremyfavouritefood · 02/07/2022 12:55

'Stand behind the grassy knoll and shout 'Duck!'". Absolute genius.

And the Arnold Rimmer song ... neither DH nor I could breathe for laughing.

InMySpareTime · 02/07/2022 12:55

Two suits! Two suits is dead!

LaurieFairyCake · 02/07/2022 12:55

I've just started watching it again from the beginning

I know EVERY WORD Shock

If only I'd turned my skills to something useful I could be president of the world or summat

lizziesiddal79 · 02/07/2022 12:52

I still sleep in a ‘Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast’ T-shirt

Aerodactyl · 02/07/2022 12:49

'Give quiche a chance' 😁 I want it on a tshirt!

NotMeNoNo · 02/07/2022 12:47

If there was a Zoom background that made you look like Holly I'd pay good money

Wishihadanalgorithm · 02/07/2022 12:47

I have found my tribe! I often find myself singing “Tongue tied, tied tongue, whenever you’re around.”

It is such a clever series with so many catch-phrases. . Need to go and rewatch.

KittenKong · 02/07/2022 12:39

For some reason it’s toasters in our house!

Original poster
Needhelp101 · 02/07/2022 12:32

KittenKong · 02/07/2022 11:57

But where do all the toasters go, you crypto fascist?

I don't know about toasters but obviously all the calculators go to Silicon Heaven! 😁

OP posts:
Glittertwins · 02/07/2022 12:31

"We're gonna get through this" when faced with too much homework

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