To ask if Co-Ed is better than single sex..

@GabriellaMontez

Yes I'm happy with both kids school.

I've thankfully not encountered these issues yet.

I dont view all teen boys as a risk

They shouldn't. But it's not the fault of the parents of girls. I have a girl, she will be going to a single sex school. It's literally all I can do. I can't bring my sons up differently, I haven't got any. I also can't bring anyone else's sons up. All I can do for my daughter is try to protect her from the excesses of some teenage boy's behaviour at a crucial time in her life.

If you think that I wouldn't change the culture around this if I could, you're completely wrong. I am not opting out because I refuse to fix this, despite being omnipotent. I'm opting out because it's literally the best choice I can make for the child for whom I can make any choice.

Totally different. It's much easier for the organisers of extra curricular sports and hobbies to discipline or permanently exclude a child who is causing problems.

Same in the workplace.

It's classrooms that are the problem. So I'm happy my dd isn't in one. If you're happy with your mixed, great, I'm glad it works for you.

Just to be clear, it's not a private school, some areas do still have single sex, state schools.

@PleasantBirthday

Its not fine. Its horrific.

Which is the point I'm making.

A few parents choosing ss for their girls won't help.

It won't help address the problem.

Ss boys schools will make it worse.

Why should girls in mixed schools be sacrificed to it?

Best not do anything ever then. Life will take its course and girls will be harassed everywhere they go without respite and that's all fine.

@Topgub

Both myself and my DH are police officers… I worked in child abuse investigation for 8 years so I’m pretty good at risk assessments. (Although to be fair so are lots of people.) I want my DD to have a broad range of experiences not stifle her so I’m always trying to find ways to make things happen for her.

I went to Co-ed schools throughout, and dearly wish I had had the chance to go to a single sex girls school. I knew that at the time, and pleaded with my parents. But the only single sex option was an extremely expensive private school two towns away, which was out of the question. All the local and state schools were mixed.
Most people don't have a choice these days. But given a choice, I'd have loved to go to a girls school. I was (still am) extremely sensitive, and would have been better suited to it. I know I'd have done better academically, and had a better life. But that's just me. Others might suit Co-ed better. It's never a one size fits all.
I still feel sad about my rubbish education though 😔

@Divebar2021

How will you risk assess?

@Topgub

well clearly potential yes. We’ll do the risk assessment nearer the time.

@Divebar2021

Won't she be at risk in sports and hobbies too?

I tell you what if you’ve got boys masturbating in class, watching porn, making sexual comments, harassing girls asking for nudes or sexually assaulting anyone it hasn’t happened because a teacher isn’t bothered. It’s happened because a parent isn’t bothered. And if I can protect my DD from that by sending her to a local, non selective girls school with excellent academic results and a great reputation I will. And if the only fear is she won’t know how to talk to boys then Im sure we can rustle some up in her sports and hobbies.

@Fairislefandango

Do you think parents who chose PE give a shit about the kids in schools in deprived areas?

You really think that young teenage boys are solely to blame for this?

That the adults bare no responsibility?

The link pp posted a few posts ago is horrific.

It needs to be tackled. From govt level down. From teachers and parents

Removing your dd only helps your dd. Which is completely understandable.

But its not a solution to the problem

No wonder girls are facing such a hard time when teachers don't give a shit and other parents don't either as long as it doesn't affect their kid. It's the sake arguments used for PE.

What?! I honestly don't know how on earth you got any of that from my post. Frankly it makes me absolutely livid that anyone thinks teachers don't give a shit. I see teachers traumatised by behaviour every day, doing their absolute best to help, protect and educate the children within the school's behaviour policies, because that is the limit of what they can do. Doing their best to stop and prevent bullying, suffering harrassment themselves from students... it's a constant battle, and not one you ever really win. If anything, many teachers give too much of a shit - which is highly detrimental to their own mental health. Teacher morale is at rock bottom, lots are on long-term sick leave, and people are leaving the profession in their droves.

As for you suggesting that parents choosing their children's school indicates that they don't give a shit about anyone else... what utter rubbish. Tell me how choosing a school you don't want your child to go to helps anyone else. Actually, don't bother. I'm out. I need to go back to hiding or avoiding school threads - the ignorant nonsense people spout on them is bad for my blood pressure.

@DustyTulips

I'd expect the teachers I entrust my children to to provide a safe environment for them

That goes for any kind of bullying

I'd expect them to foster an environment where sexism isn't tolerated

If a teacher said they couldn't do anything about racism amongst their pupils would that be acceptable?

I don’t read @Fairislefandango ’s post that way at all. She’s saying she did what she could within the rules of the schools she’s worked in but that, in her opinion, enforcing those rules made no difference to the behaviour. What else would you expect her to do?

twitter.com/collectiveshout/status/1536241265435877376?s=21&t=zSkjBoAFCVLfZ5xcQKlhig

A whole thread in sexual harassment in schools by boys in mixed secondary schools.

I wouldn't teach in one let alone send my daughter to one.

@Fairislefandango

You appear to be arguing against something I havent said

No wonder girls are facing such a hard time when teachers don't give a shit and other parents don't either as long as it doesn't affect their kid. It's the sake arguments used for PE

Meh, not my problem

Which is why ss will never be the answer

What did you do to tackle the issue when you taught in boys schools and mixed schools?

I followed the school's behaviour policies, as I did for all instances of bad behaviour. Because that's basically all you can do.

I never said it was a bad thing for those particular children. But why would you be ok with the 'solution' only being available to a select few?

I am not ok with the many inequalities in the UK education system. Does me being not ok with them actually help remove them? No, not in any way. It is not parents' fault that the quality and type of school varies from area to area. Why on earth would they deliberately not send their child to the school which they feel would best suit their child? Refusing to do so would not be the slightest help to children in other areas of the country who do not have access to that type of school.

If you were ill or injured, would you deliberately choose not to use the best healthcare provider available to you locally, because you know that people in some other areas have poor healthcare? People are entitled to use the schools available in their area.

It’s none of my business.

If you choose to send your DD to mixed, then you’re doing it for your own good reasons.

I’m really only genuinely interested in my DD. I’m making choices based on my own experiences, and what I believe will be best for her.

There are plenty of people on here who actively choose mixed. Fair play - it’s a free world, and we make our own decisions.

I have good friends who’ve sent their DDs to mixed. I don’t go lecturing them - hardly. Their decision for their child.

@Fairislefandango

I never said it was a bad thing for those particular children. But why would you be ok with the 'solution' only being available to a select few?

What did you do to tackle the issue when you taught in boys schools and mixed schools?

It only helps that small proportion for that time they are in school.

And protecting children while they are in school is a bad thing? Is it not pretty normal to protect children against things which they will have to deal with when they are adults?

I find it a bit odd that we are being told that ss doesn't work and doesn't fix things by someone who admits they have no actual personal knowledge or experience of it since it effectively doesn't exist in their country. I went to a mixed primary and junior school and a girls' secondary school and have taught in girls' schools, boys' schools and many mixed schools. I think I've got a fairly good idea of the advantages and disadvantages compared with the average person tbh.

Kairoun personally yes. But just my subjective opinion

@RenegadeMatron

Whatever you need yo tell yourself

Out of interest, do you think that those of us who have the choice to send our daughters to a SS school but actively choose not to, are doing them a grave disservice?

We’re going to have to agree to disagree.

It absolutely is the answer for those girls who go to single sex schools.

It just is.