To ask if Co-Ed is better than single sex..

Totally agree. Coming from Italy where single sex schools were abolished in the sixties (together with school uniforms) I really struggle with the concept of “protecting girls from boys”. My daughter will go to a mixed school, same as my son. However, my Irish husband who grew up in a country where single sex schools are the norm, has a totally different view. I often discuss the issue with my English friends here and we respect each other opinion (unlike some of the comments I see here…)

Without knowing the specific circumstances surrounding the "pregnancies" in your school, it's difficult to draw meaningful conclusions

Throughout numerous years of attending single-sex schools, I encountered only one instance of teenage "pregnancy." During the comparatively short span of attendance at a co-ed school (one year), I learned of no less than ten girls who, with parental consent, had to undergo the procedure of terminating their "pregnancies"

The general trend is clear to me. In co-ed schools, boys and girls have easier access to one another. A heightened accessibility to members of the opposite sex exacerbates the likelihood of sexual assault and teenage "pregnancy"

It depends on the child and the school.

I hated my single sex school but it was run by nuns and we were very much expected to do well in school but as soon as we had children to be stay at home parents.

My brother loved his school, he is still in touch with some people he was at school with. I'm not in contact with anyone from school.

I came out with a string of qualifications but no self esteem.

@FuriousFalcon

We had 16 pregnancies in my last year of school.

Just sharing my own experiences of single sex education . Two years ago.

That'd be a brilliant idea!

I can already imagine the mind-expanding, lively debates we'd have on the morality of brain consumption, the challenges of maintaining a healthy pale complexion, and the best methods for perfecting the classic zombie walking style in school 😂👏

Perhaps we need a co-ed thread for human-zombie education??

My DD is at all girls. She's thriving with opportunities , much more confident and no more bitchiness than her friends are having at Co Ed. She still sees and is friends with boys from primary. She won't be arguing about boys like her friends are. She isn't and won't grow up socially retarded around boys like many have the mis apprehension of stating. Like her headmaster stated it's not just the schools job for socialisation plenty of other opportunities too.

You caught me red-handed!

Kingdom (my favorite Zombie Kdrama) inspired me to resurrect this dormant thread. My fascination with Zombies is spilling over into my online discussions 😉

Beautifully written and well-articulated

The heartfelt account of your son's experience at an all-boys school resonates with my own appreciation for single-sex education. I found the comfortable environment of all-girls schools empowering and conducive to learning. There's something (positive) to be said for the camaraderie and solidarity that form among students in a single-sex setting, and the excitement that accompanies them

Single-sex schools do offer fewer distractions. This is evident in your observation that neither you nor your children felt compelled to alter your appearance or behavior to appeal to the opposite sex

I too believe that single-sex education should be an accessible choice for anyone (parent or child) who recognizes its unique benefits

Competition and self-esteem issues are more pronounced in co-ed schools, wherein the immature, underdeveloped minds of children and teenagers are ill-equipped to handle the presence of the opposite sex. They end up competing academically, and for social standing and attention from the opposite sex

I could argue that co-ed schools are breeding grounds for sexual harassment and teenage "pregnancy." It's unwise to facilitate potential incidents by placing girls and boys in close proximity

Is the device (phone, computer, etc) you're using "natural?" Is school "natural?"

It's logically inconsistent to condemn the single-sex educational model on the basis of its "unnaturalness," and rely on unnatural inventions to communicate with others

I think you need to look at the individual schools you have a good chance of getting in to. Some single sex schools are fantastic, some are awful. Some coed schools are fantastic, some are awful.

Most of the research on the impact of single sex schooling is poor (as in there are few studies that are rigorous enough to have much confidence in their findings). The better studies (e.g. the ones that take account of factors like parental wealth, selection, parental education etc.) tend not to find significant differences even in maths and science performance. So the impact of other factors on your DD’s education is likely to be far more significant than whether she goes to a single sex or coed school.

In the UK single sex schools are likely to be correlated with other factors that improve outcomes so may well be where you end up, but look at the schools individually and think about how your DD would fit in and be served by what they offer.

I deliberately haven't read the responses because I wanted to give my unbiased opinion - hope that's OK!

It depends on the child (what a surprise!) but for my academic son we chose an all-boys grammar and he was in heaven. We looked round all the local schools - without telling him our own views - but the scruffy, paint-flaking boys' grammar stood out as being right for him. It had a brisk, competitive feel where it would be OK to be a hard-working achiever and eccentricities were tolerated. He thrived there, and they had some girls in the sixth form which was great.

I really do think that for academic purposes, single-sex is best. It's less distracting! Neither of my kids ever bothered about messing with their hair or hitching up their skirts etc at their single-sex schools, but I know the pressure to appeal to the opposite sex at co-eds can be oppressive.

I went to an all-girls' grammar and I just loved it. It was exciting when we got together with the boys' school for some things, but I liked not having to have boys around when I was trying to focus on lessons!

(This is just my view based on my children and my experience. I'm not laying down the law for other people...)

Whilst I agree with your point I'm not sure if you noticed this is a zombie from two years ago?

Your experiences don't reflect those of the majority of girls

Having experienced verbal harassment from male classmates and faculty, I was "worn down by trying to fit in" a co-ed school. My academic success and self-confidence only flourished in a girls' school

To claim that preferring single-sex education equates to weakness is dismissive and insensitive. How would you feel if the roles were reversed and your alleged "struggles" in single-sex environments were used as a basis to label you weak?

The very fabric of modern society is unnatural. If unnaturalness were the problem, people would be living in caves

The opposite sex is a distraction and harmful influence. Children and teenagers in co-ed schools are more likely to engage in performative displays of masculinity or femininity at the expense of their education

In contrast, single-sex schools are a refuge from societal pressures. Girls and boys get to focus on their academic growth without the added burden of impressing the opposite sex

"Learning about life/how to work with different people" can be achieved through extracurricular activities, social events, and community engagement outside of the school environment

Instilling in young minds the twisted belief that they should "enjoy" spending time with the opposite sex is an unwarranted and detrimental approach to development. From my experience, I prefer not to interact socially with those of the opposite sex. Separate societies for men and women would have been a dream come true. I'm of the strong belief that educational institutions should instead concentrate on promoting intellectual development and strengthening bonds between members of the same sex

I went to a single sex grammar. Reading about the endemic levels of sexual harassment and assault in co-ed schools, I’m very glad my parents made that choice. Co-ed is good for boys because girls bring them up but it’s bad for girls with sexual harassment dragging them down at too early an age.

I know areas with grammar schools still have many single sex state schools. Also fairly common in inner cities. But apparently only 12% of secondary schools, UK wide, are single sex. So the vast majority attend co-ed, and have no choice. The areas you describe are surely very much in the minority? Everyone should be given a choice in my view...

It's not most.

It completely dependent on where you live.

If you live where I grew up, where my DP grew up or where I live now then there are state non-selective single sex schools.

Totally agree @thing47 , it’s so clear how much variation there is depending on where you live.
I went to an inner city co-ed state school and my first experience of sexual harassment was by grown men on public transport, and not at school in the slightest.

Some replies feel slightly scare mongering - we clearly had separate toilets and changing rooms for PE and had the option to do mixed or separate PE lessons (which maybe was unique).

Where I grew up the private same sex schools were full of eating disorders, class A drugs, and had a reputation of being easy shags for the local boys schools. That could obviously be confounded by the addition privilege/entitlement of being private).

I’ve got 3 STEM degrees and work in a heavily male dominated sector and although co-ed isn’t for everyone, I did learn very early on in my education how to get my voice heard over men and I also think it made me incredibly competitive as I refused to be let boys beat me in the sciences/maths, which has served me well. Personally I think I would have really struggled in a girls only environment, and I think any head strong nature would have been worn down by trying to fit in.

Obviously most of us went through school without social media as it is today, but I’d be delighted if a daughter of mine had the school experience I did.

All this thread has really established is that there are wildly different experiences of both single sex and mixed sex schools. So much depends on the strength of the HT and SLT in both the culture they promote and the support they give their staff to stamp out any instances of sexual harassment or bullying by the pupils, boys or girls.

I am theoretically totally behind mixed schooling, but can also see why some mothers are wary of it, given some of the horror stories. FWIW DD2 had no issues at her secondary modern, which wasn't a great school academically but had a very strong, no-nonsense HT. I also acknowledge that DD2 is a feisty, independent soul who doesn't really do 'drama', she just steps away from it. I don't think the answer is just to tell girls that they need to be more robust, they need to know that any concerns they have are listened to and taken seriously rather than dismissed. Excusing unacceptable behaviour by saying 'that's boys for you' doesn't do anyone any favours, girls or boys.

DS went to a boys' school – has that caused issues in his later relationships with girls and women as some claim it might? I don't think I would go that far, but his friendship group was inevitably male. If he didn't have sisters I might have been more concerned.

In the context of boys being at sports and hobbies

@Divebar2021

What are you risk assessing then?

@Topgub

Youre misrepresenting what I said. My comment was in relation to the concern that girls and boys in SS wouldn’t know how to engage with the opposite sex. You challenged the comment I made about her mixing with boys in extra curricular activities. My risk assessment comment is not the same as thinking every boy is a risk. Parents “risk assess” all the time although they may not use that term.

@GabriellaMontez

Someone said they would risk assessment their dd being in contact with boys, yes.

No one has denied that lots of schools have serious issues with behaviour that I can see.

Even ss schools can have serious issues with behaviour

Lots of PE ss schools are awful for drug use and bullying

Did someone here say they view all teen boys as a risk? I really hope not.

That would be as ridiculous as refusing to recognise that some schools have serious issues with behaviour.