To be upset with my father?

In this exact situation right now. My fathers new (6 month relationship with his 20 years his junior fiancée) soon to be wife will inherit everything of my beautiful late mums. Everything my mum has worked for, the properties that she worked hard to buy and keep and her substantial savings.
My mum died suddenly and they both had a will giving the living spouse everything. We will get nothing of my mums, or my dads. He is living with his fiancée and her children. She is not much older than me and will inherit everything of my mums.
Please try to get your mum to see a solicitor to make sure that you won't lose everything she wanted you to have. It's an awful situation.

Well he is an idiot for stating that out loud, your mum can now make her will so you get all of her share whereas before she probably would have been fine with it going to your dad.

I am glad your mother at least is thinking of you and your brother.

Your father sounds like he was a shit husband and father to you, so no surprise there.

Not someone I would be putting myself out to visit.

My dad's about to do this. Heartbreaking. My mum would've wanted us to inherit.

My dad remarried. Gave his second wife the right to live in the house (which was our family home) till her death. Money was shared between my siblings and her.

If your dad remarried he can make a will leaving his estate to you, cant he?
If I was in this situation I would be thoroughly pissed if the family inheritance ended up going to strangers, should a parent remarry. Call me grabby if you like but why should some randomers get the benefit of what my family worked for?

It's a good job he was so honest as now your mother knows and can prepare accordingly.

On the other side, my father is reluctant to marry his partner of 7 years because he feels it would complicate his children's inheritance. We really don't care though but he won't listen!

Your update definitely changes things completely. He should at a very minimum provide for his child's needs.

Yanbu
When parents remarry when they already have children, they should safeguard their children's inheritance in new wills.

I think YABU. At least, I did until I read your update. Having a disabled child changes things and of you are expected to continue caring for him after their deaths then YANBU.

I definitely think your mum should be annoyed with his response too!!!

I don’t think it is about the money, it’s about his dismissive attitude to his actual family. He even puts his mythical new wife ahead of you all. What an absolute chump.

What an absolutely crap thing for your dad to say.

christ your update! He has a severely braindamaged child and he thinks it ok to state openly that his assets would go to a new wife. What a piece of shit he is.

It is a given on MN that you are not entitled to any inheritance and you are the famous "grabby" if you feel a bit off if your dad leaves all his assets to his wife of 2 years after accumulating those assets with his wife of 30 years.

Meanwhile in the real world what you get in the will in families feels like the love you got and I don't know anyone who wouldn't be a bit upset if their dad basically said the family assets would go to his new wife - instead of his children having a share too. If I were your mum I would change my will so that at the very least any money/savings/jewellery/and personal items I had went directly to my children. After all she can leave it to who she likes right? otherwise her engagement ring could go to her successor instead of her daughter.

given that you will be responsible for your brother’s care, your father is an idiot to spout this shit. Your mum should probably take legal steps to protect you in the event that she dies first as your dad will probably replace her within a few weeks.

Your father is an insensitive arsehole, and I'm willing to bet he has form. Your poor mum.

I think our dad is being very selfish. It sounds like your mum would wish you to inherit and not a new spouse, and therefore your mum should do a trust will to ensure it happens because your dad clearly couldn't be trusted to respect your mum's wishes. I daresay your mum would respect your dad's from what you've written. He sounds like a charmer

I’d find it kind of hurtful too - as though he’s valuing a new incomer more than his own current family. All the more so if you have a sibling with requirements for ongoing care. Hope your mum manages to get decent legal advice on what to put in her will to protect you both as much as possible.

I think adults are allowed to remarry. And if they do so, they have responsibilities to the new spouse,some of which come before the responsibilities to the kids.

It is more difficult if there are things like a family property, or kids with ongoing needs, and there are ways to accomodate that in a second marriage. But in terms of just plain passing on cash assets, some should go to a second wife.

If your mum wouldn't want to do that it's fine but I don't think it's a thing to be a martyr about if she would be happier having met someone new.

My mother’s will states that everything is going to my dad. If he remarries, he has to pay me and my siblings everything he interited from my mum.
She didnt want to cut him out or share the inheritance, because the main asset is the house and he wouldnt be able to stay there if he had to share it with my siblings and me. But she made it very clear that her inheritance wont go to a future hypothetical wife and other children.
Your mother should see a solicitor to set something like this up. Or just leave everything directly to her kids.

I would be most upset if my DM missed out on potential happiness in her last years to ensure we had an inheritance.

YANBU. This happened to DH's friend.

Our main asset is the house.

Both DH and I are redoing wills so that on either death, DC inherit our share of the house with DH or I having a life interest in it.

Neither of us want our DC to lose out.