Page 18 | High earners - how do you spend your salary?

Citygirly · 2022-05-21T09:03:11+00:00

DH and I earn just under £140k combined. We do maximum pension payments (his is 9% as NHS) and we also give about 10% a month to charity. Other than that, we plan to start overpaying the mortgage. We invest £1k a month (so £500 each) and save £1k for holidays. We of course do general/specific savings but then have a good chunk left over for disposable income. AIBU to ask other high earning households how they tend to allocate their money? Just want to see if we could be using it better or this is about right for comparables.

RosesAndHellebores · 22/05/2022 22:02

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LoisLane66 · 22/05/2022 21:56

I have no idea. My ex's accountant deals with my investments, savings and bills. I spend whatever I want on whatever I want.
It's naff to talk about money.
If you need to look at prices then you have no money to speak of.

Pecially · 22/05/2022 21:56

Snobbery and inverted snobbery are both as bad as each other.

Our spend goes on:

boarding school
horses
mortgage
high pension contributions
holidays

Probably the stereotypical toff wankers 🤷🏼‍♀️

Topgub · 22/05/2022 21:53

@RosesAndHellebores

Is the faith school deprived? What does charitable status mean?

What do you do if I may ask?

I* *dont vote tory, I dont avoid tax and I dont send my kids to a private school

WrongWayApricot · 22/05/2022 21:51

Solid gold toilet obvs

Jmaho · 22/05/2022 21:46

Robinni · 22/05/2022 21:35

We had a choice of several schools where a higher % of kids don't speak English as a first language - the pass rates for English and Maths were 30-40%. With the language issue it takes away from the teaching; they spend so much time dealing with it the education of the class suffers. Your BiL made a good call.

We looked at private but thankfully found another good school, pass rates over 90%. Now considering private again as the class size is enormous and nephew/niece had some incidents in later years of primary which raised concern for me.

Sorry your BiL feels the need to shove private education down your throat and is dismissive of your children's talents. But that does not excuse you running around insulting people because you perceive they may be like him.

Show quote history

I've insulted 3 people on this thread. The first was a poster who made sweeping statements about state schools and the children and families who attend them. The second was my brother in law who is an obnoxious, bigoted idiot and the third was a poster who corrected my spelling. There is no need for anyone else to be insulted by my posts. I'm not anti private school, I'm not pro state schools. I'm anti generalisations and snobbery.
I gave anecdotal examples of the only children I know who are privately educated. The poster who I replied to originally gave anecdotal examples of state school children. But I'm the only one who bit it seems. It got my back up, both the tone and content of his/her post.

BellePeppa · 22/05/2022 21:43

Howmuchwood · 22/05/2022 20:57

@jmaho I agree that some privately educated children can be awful, as they get older they see what their parent's money has bought and they do look down their noses at others. I only have my own experience to go on but when I've met people like this they are usually from very rich families but actually struggling academically and their parent's money is a sort of defence mechanism. Its sad to see.

You clearly care a lot about your DC and I you've obviously done a wonderful job bringing them up. I think all teachers would agree that parents are the biggest influence on younger children. Teaching DC respect and the value of education and serving others is always going to stand them in good stead.

Unfortunately in state schools the polite and well mannered children can get overlooked when the teacher has to spend all their time dealing with the 5 or more disruptors. I moved from state to private for secondary and it was a world of difference. In state school I was mocked for getting top marks, in private I was applauded. In state I was laughed at for putting my hand up to answer the teacher and for trying to help others. I was top of the class in both schools but I had a lot more competition in the private school and a lot more opportunities and was pushed in a healthy way to achieve my best. I would never have had the confidence and self belief to do what I have since without those years of private school. I am very thankful for the opportunity.

This is why my two went to private. I was badly bullied at my state comp because I was a ‘good’ kid and it really clouded my judgement when the only school on offer (small town) for my two was one with a similar reputation (they had friends who went there and they hated it). They were really bright and I didn’t want them to suffer the same fate I did. If the school hadn’t had such a bad reputation I probably wouldn’t have gone private. I don’t regret it though as unlike me they have zero bad memories of school.

RosesAndHellebores · 22/05/2022 21:40

@Topgub absolutely I would. It is essential. For the time being we just have a trust set up at the dc's former cofe state primary to ensure every child who wishes may learn an instrument. We pay for the tuition and instruments for children whose parents can't. We also pay a substantial sum for extra curricular and trips. DH is a school governor at a school in Westminster where most dc are deprived and many don't have English as a first language.

FWIW I am also on the board of a homeless charity and pre covid cooked for 80 and served three times a year. I have recently been nominated to sit as a non exec for a London hospital.

I also work full-time for an organisation with charitable status in a professional role.

What do you do if I may ask?

Howmuchwood · 22/05/2022 21:37

@topgub I already pay the top tax rate but yes I would be willing to pay more if it went to schools and healthcare

I'm not overly keen on it going to some of the daft things I see public money being spent on like Rishi Sunak ordering £500k of opinion polls, I mean if that doesn't epitomise what's wrong with our current govt then what does!!

dillydally24 · 22/05/2022 21:35

Citygirly · 22/05/2022 21:23

This is really helpful, thank you. I was under the impression I could only do 5% with my workplace scheme. I'll have to check this.
(This is why it is good to ask! I thought I was doing the maximum I could).

We invest more than we save but I would like more cash savings than DH as having the money readily accessible makes me feel more comfortable. However, I completely appreciate it is better long term to invest so our money is beating inflation. I suppose it's just working out how much we should have access to easily.

Show quote history

You're welcome. Also, I would consider not overpaying the mortgage but putting the money into savings instead. This is not the right choice for everyone, but our mortgage interest rate is low relative to what we can earn in a diversified portfolio of investments, so it's what we do. If you are young with a high and pretty secure earning capacity, then it makes sense to have as much leverage as possible.

Robinni · 22/05/2022 21:35

Jmaho · 22/05/2022 21:13

I agree with you. I'm actually not anti private education at all. It's just the sweeping statements about state school that got my back up. We are very lucky with both our local primary and secondary schools. The teachers are very strict about manners, attendance, uniform etc. And bad behaviour is not tolerated at all. The Secretary for Education visited my sons secondary school about a month ago and I received a phonecall from one of his team telling me how proud I should be of my son who spent some time talking to him about what they had been learning about. He said he was blown away by his confidence and positivity for learning. You can imagine how proud I felt!
It is a bit of a touchy subject for me as we are constantly being told how amazing my nephews school is, how they are learning French and about Shakespeare (yes mine are too!) how states schools must be rubbish as the teachers are so poorly paid so only the worst teachers must work there! The absolute best part of it all is that they did actually apply to state school initially but didn't get their catchment school and got offered a school a little further away where there is a high percentage of children who do not speak English as their first language. This was a big no no for my brother in law who believe it or not is an Immigration Lawyer!!

Show quote history

We had a choice of several schools where a higher % of kids don't speak English as a first language - the pass rates for English and Maths were 30-40%. With the language issue it takes away from the teaching; they spend so much time dealing with it the education of the class suffers. Your BiL made a good call.

We looked at private but thankfully found another good school, pass rates over 90%. Now considering private again as the class size is enormous and nephew/niece had some incidents in later years of primary which raised concern for me.

Sorry your BiL feels the need to shove private education down your throat and is dismissive of your children's talents. But that does not excuse you running around insulting people because you perceive they may be like him.

Topgub · 22/05/2022 21:33

@Howmuchwood

Why would PE MPs care about state education?

Would you be willing to pay more tax to fund better education for all?

What about you @RosesAndHellebores

Jmaho · 22/05/2022 21:30

fridaRose · 22/05/2022 20:53

'my nephews are both privately educated and are rude, obnoxious little shits who have cash thrown at them. It always makes me chuckle'

You sound bitter @Jmaho

(It's 'extravAgant').

If only my parents had tried a bit harder and earnt more so I could have a private education. I'd never have spelt any words wrong eh? By the way, correcting someone's spelling and grammar is utterly pathetic and just makes you look like a fool, money or not

Howmuchwood · 22/05/2022 21:30

@jmaho if I were you I'd just let your brash nephews / family remarks wash over you and take comfthat you're doing an amazing job as you are. Your DC will no doubt go on to great things, and don't let the experience with your nephews put you or them off private school, just remember there are arseholes everywhere unfortunately and best to steer clear if you meet one regardless.

@topgub i agree and as the child and grandchild of teachers it is a travesty that education budgets are still being cut especially after the last few years of chaos in schools. I won a scholarship to private school and honestly thank my lucky stars for it. I wish there was a way to give all children access to what I had but until govt funds early years and schools properly its pie in the sky thinking. Write to your MP, write to the education secretary and encourage everyone you know to do the same.

Lovemyheathershimmer · 22/05/2022 21:28

Jmaho
👏👏👏👏

Eeiliethya · 22/05/2022 21:24

I just carry on living modestly like I did before I started earning a high salary.
I come from a very working class background, I would feel a bit of a twat if I suddenly started floating round with designer bling and a Range Rover.

As long as everything's covered, bit goes in savings, I generally live for the moment and not overthink it. I enjoy being able to take my family for nice meals and holidays they wouldn't be able to do otherwise (my mum especially, she sacrificed a lot for me growing up).

The only real luxuries I would say I have is my cleaner andI invest in good skincare products and well fitted clothes.

It's not something I generally discuss with people, some of the people I work with who have to shoehorn their luxurious lifestyle into every conversation and slap their Mulberry bag under everyone's noses makes me cringe.

Original poster

Citygirly · 22/05/2022 21:23

dillydally24 · 22/05/2022 21:20

Put as much as you can into savings. Are you sure you've maxed out your pension contributions? You can put in £40k or 100% of your gross income per annum into a pension fund and you get tax relief on your contributions at your highest marginal rate so it's a great way to save. You can then fill up your ISAs. You each have a £20k per annum ISA allowance, split between a £4k LISA and £16k normal ISA. Contributions to the LISA get a boost of 25% from the government (which turns £4k to £5k), but can't be used until after you hit 60. If you have kids, each of them will have a £9k junior ISA allowance per annum. Establishing junior ISAs for your kids is a great way to save for their future, but the cash is legally theirs and you can't stop them spending it when they hit 18. If you have anything left over, you can pay into a pension fund for your kids. You can contribute up to £3,600 gross for each kid, which benefits from tax relief at 20%. Make sure all your savings are invested in the markets. With inflation running at 10% they will lose value if left in cash. Once you've put a chunk into savings, enjoy yourself. We spend our excess cash (once we've paid for our mortgage and utilities, childcare, doggy daycare, charity contributions and savings as per the above) on nice food, gym membership, art and antiques, and one nice holiday a year.

This is really helpful, thank you. I was under the impression I could only do 5% with my workplace scheme. I'll have to check this.
(This is why it is good to ask! I thought I was doing the maximum I could).

We invest more than we save but I would like more cash savings than DH as having the money readily accessible makes me feel more comfortable. However, I completely appreciate it is better long term to invest so our money is beating inflation. I suppose it's just working out how much we should have access to easily.

OP posts:

Tallulah1972 · 22/05/2022 21:23

I stopped reading at ‘earn just under £140k’.
can’t even begin to imagine…

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 21:21

Oh and my PhD is also from a Russell Group university (apparently that's a thing, which I didn't realise before being on MN - although frankly it makes no difference to me or my employer so long as I'm qualified!). So there you go. State school education and PhD from prestigious uni. Guess I'm an outlier? 🤔😂

Newmumatlast · 22/05/2022 21:20

RosesAndHellebores · 22/05/2022 19:27

@Citygirly the other thing about private schools, and ours went to London Day Schools is the subject specialisation early on and introduction of languages. From age 7/8 French, Maths Science, English, Ancient History/early Latin, Geography and History were all taught by subject specialists. Both children have very sound friendship groups which are carrying through with them.

DS is finishing a PhD, DD shortly due to start a Masters in Speech and Language therapy. Both went to Oxbridge. DS very sporty and DD very musical and both those interests were well catered for.

If both DC work for 35 years and earn £20k more per year than they otherwise would have (entirely feasible) the differential should be £700,000 between them. Jointly their educations have cost us about £350,000. But well worth it in every way apart from that.

DH went to the local comp and became a lawyer (barrister). He was insistent the children should learn Latin because he felt it was something he missed out on. He was about 27 when we met and didn't have the self confidence I had despite having a brain like a planet.

So I'm like your DH. It's the lack of self confidence and belief that is making me consider private for my children at least at secondary. State worked for me in terms of where I am now but I'm more in the minority, I do feel out of place in a lot of rooms, and I have poor self esteem. I also don't have the contacts others have. I havent decided yet but it is something that keeps niggling at me about whether state is the right choice if I can afford private.

dillydally24 · 22/05/2022 21:20

Put as much as you can into savings. Are you sure you've maxed out your pension contributions? You can put in £40k or 100% of your gross income per annum into a pension fund and you get tax relief on your contributions at your highest marginal rate so it's a great way to save. You can then fill up your ISAs. You each have a £20k per annum ISA allowance, split between a £4k LISA and £16k normal ISA. Contributions to the LISA get a boost of 25% from the government (which turns £4k to £5k), but can't be used until after you hit 60. If you have kids, each of them will have a £9k junior ISA allowance per annum. Establishing junior ISAs for your kids is a great way to save for their future, but the cash is legally theirs and you can't stop them spending it when they hit 18. If you have anything left over, you can pay into a pension fund for your kids. You can contribute up to £3,600 gross for each kid, which benefits from tax relief at 20%. Make sure all your savings are invested in the markets. With inflation running at 10% they will lose value if left in cash. Once you've put a chunk into savings, enjoy yourself. We spend our excess cash (once we've paid for our mortgage and utilities, childcare, doggy daycare, charity contributions and savings as per the above) on nice food, gym membership, art and antiques, and one nice holiday a year.

Topgub · 22/05/2022 21:16

@RosesAndHellebores

Fuck me.

Yeah those are real struggles

Mummybud · 22/05/2022 21:14

Jmaho · 22/05/2022 20:30

I'd read through all the nonsense about £140hk not being a high salary plus the usual ridiculousness about it not going far when you have a big mortgage and childcare to pay. But now we're onto how state schools are utterly shit full of feral vile children and I can't bite my tongue. Some of you are so out of touch with the real world its laughable. Because you earn lots of money you look down your noses at the rest of us like we're dort at the bottom of your shoe.
My children attend state schools and are well mannered, extremely bright and going to do really well in life. Above all else they're well adjusted and in touch with the world around them. Oh and most important of all they're happy! As we are talking anecdotally, my nephews are both privately educated and are rude, obnoxious little shits who have cash thrown at them. It always makes me chuckle as when we attend their extravegant birthday parties it is my children whose hands are up answering questions and getting involved when the private school children sit there sullen faced and looking bored
On a recent visit my nephews both sat in their rooms playing computer refusing to either say hello or goodbye to us whilst my feral poor state educated children were downstairs either helping out with the food or talking politics with my brother in law
Whilst we don't have the money or inclination for private school we make up for this with time. Without high flying careers and salaries we are able to attend every school event, help with homework and all eat dinner together around the table at night. So you can all piss off with your assumptions that your children are more intelligent and better people because of the education that you pay for

Genuine question: if your children (who sound brilliant) grow up with the potential to have “high flying careers and salaries” but in order to make
those careers work they need to send their kids to private school because they wouldn’t be “able to attend every school event, help with homework and eat dinner together around the table at night” - would you want them to do it? Or forego their
ambition and earning potential to be (in you view) more “present”?

Because a lot of us are those kids.

MrsDisney · 22/05/2022 21:13

Was hoping this thread was a joke! 😳
absolutely depressing

Jmaho · 22/05/2022 21:13

Howmuchwood · 22/05/2022 20:57

@jmaho I agree that some privately educated children can be awful, as they get older they see what their parent's money has bought and they do look down their noses at others. I only have my own experience to go on but when I've met people like this they are usually from very rich families but actually struggling academically and their parent's money is a sort of defence mechanism. Its sad to see.

You clearly care a lot about your DC and I you've obviously done a wonderful job bringing them up. I think all teachers would agree that parents are the biggest influence on younger children. Teaching DC respect and the value of education and serving others is always going to stand them in good stead.

Unfortunately in state schools the polite and well mannered children can get overlooked when the teacher has to spend all their time dealing with the 5 or more disruptors. I moved from state to private for secondary and it was a world of difference. In state school I was mocked for getting top marks, in private I was applauded. In state I was laughed at for putting my hand up to answer the teacher and for trying to help others. I was top of the class in both schools but I had a lot more competition in the private school and a lot more opportunities and was pushed in a healthy way to achieve my best. I would never have had the confidence and self belief to do what I have since without those years of private school. I am very thankful for the opportunity.

I agree with you. I'm actually not anti private education at all. It's just the sweeping statements about state school that got my back up. We are very lucky with both our local primary and secondary schools. The teachers are very strict about manners, attendance, uniform etc. And bad behaviour is not tolerated at all. The Secretary for Education visited my sons secondary school about a month ago and I received a phonecall from one of his team telling me how proud I should be of my son who spent some time talking to him about what they had been learning about. He said he was blown away by his confidence and positivity for learning. You can imagine how proud I felt!
It is a bit of a touchy subject for me as we are constantly being told how amazing my nephews school is, how they are learning French and about Shakespeare (yes mine are too!) how states schools must be rubbish as the teachers are so poorly paid so only the worst teachers must work there! The absolute best part of it all is that they did actually apply to state school initially but didn't get their catchment school and got offered a school a little further away where there is a high percentage of children who do not speak English as their first language. This was a big no no for my brother in law who believe it or not is an Immigration Lawyer!!