To think this cake is inappropriate

@Greensleeves

This is exactly what I meant, I just didn't get it right.

Yes I was going to mention that, and thought it was inappropriate at the time and was surprised the media didn't say anthing. If for example she wanted to dress up in the clothes just have an edwardian themed partydon't....

Agree with the pp that said it is weird that some tragedies seem to be ok to be "glamourised" (for lack of a better word) - e.g. schools often do ww2 dress up days, as did my local supermarket for some reason, but others dont....

My autistic 19yo sometimes makes remarks about "autism moms". He isn't ableist or a bigot, he's just a fairly politicised autistic person who disapproves of a particular (largely online) culture among a minority of parents of autistic people - the ones who champion ABA and other such abusive conversion methods, the ones who post videos online of their autistic children having meltdowns, with no regard for that child's privacy or dignity, the ones who bang on about grieving for the child they should have had. He finds that culture offensive and repellent, and while I have had many conversations with him about meeting people half way and understanding that people DO grieve for their alteredb expectations while still loving their autistic child, I can see his point.

"Autism mums/moms" is a phrase often used in certain online communities (especially autistic communities) to refer to that particular subset of parents, who are seen to be damaging to autistic people and their place in society. It doesn't mean all parents of autistic children.

Just to be absolutely clear - I am autistic. I made a mistake. I was referring to the small groups of self proclaimed 'autism mums' online who do nothing but preach entitled ent for both them and their children. I didn't mean all mums of autistic children, of which I have 2. I got it wrong and apologised. I'm not really articulate enough to get it right all the time but I honestly thought most people had come across this before too.

Goodness no that's not how I intended at all. I was moaning a small group not all

It wasn't. She was just being snide about autistic kids and their parents.

Then, when called out on it, tried to make out that others had the problem because they didn't understand sarcasm. Y'know, like autistic people.

I'd be interested to know just how you intended it, then, if you did not intend it as 'nasty or disabling [sic]'. Just for my own edification, like.

And your post was repellent. I was offended by it. I'm entitled to tell you that,

The 'autism mums' post was ridiculous and sneery. My daughter is autistic... does that make me make some sort of dickhead who's incapable of bringing her up properly, who will do anything, however inappropriate, to keep her happy and doesn't know where to draw a line?

Clue: no it doesn't.

I didn't see where it was mentioned that the cake was for an autistic child in any case.

So far today my five year old has painted several pictures of the titanic and made yet another Lego titanic. He’s just seen this cake picture and excitedly asked me if he can have it for his birthday. He’s already been asking for a titanic themed birthday party 🤦‍♀️

Depends. If a kid was obsessed with a certain train it would be fine so of he's obsessed on titanic it's perfect too much overthinking here

@thedancingbear

I got it wrong. I'm sorry for that. It wasn't intended as nasty or disabling and I genuinely did not mean to be offensive or repellent (what a horrible thing to say to someone trying to apologise for getting it wrong)

Fine, whatever. Does this work better for you?

'I think your post was disablist and nasty. Please can you try not to stereotype and stigmatise neuro diverse children, and their parents, because it's repellent and grossly offensive.'

As I say, report away. I don't give a monkeys.

Ok you keep backtracking...

Titanic is different to Grenfell because of the time frames at play. Yes there might be a couple of people who remember someone who was able to provide a first hand account but not many now. There have been movies etc. it’s an event in popular culture. We all saw Grenfell on the tv and internet, it is still visceral and people are still suffering. Time makes a huge difference in these matters.

@thedancingbear

I'm so sorry. I'm not nasty at all. I mean I don't like the 'autism mum' clique but I think that was missed in my post, that's all. I'm really sorry I got that wrong. But yes I did report for telling me to fuck off because if you are not happy with a post you just have to say and as has happened here I have tried to explain and apologised. Telling someone to fuck off over having a mature conversation is a horrible thing to do.

I detect no sarcasm at all in your original post.

You're just a nasty bit of work.

Report away.

I was being sarcastic. Have you never come across these types? The groups? No? Reporting you though.

@thedancingbear

I presume you missed my sarcasm? I wasn't being a dick - I even wrote 'autism mums' so it was taken as the quote intended. Perhaps you haven't come across this online but i really wasn't intending to be a dick at all. I will report your comment though. Thanks.

Not that clear when you have eyes as old as mine! I had to zoom in on the picture to spot the little "5th Birthday" line. Doesn't even say Happy to help me out!

If you're going to be so very concerned about the negative impacts of children being fascinated by terrible events of over a century ago then you might want to start with the sixty-odd books and nine TV series of Horrible Histories rather than one five year-old's birthday cake.

Interesting how sensitivities change. Looking up house and town history - postcard of photo of train crash wreckage and photo montage of coalminers killed in mine disaster. No cinema or TV of course so a way of seeing news.

I wonder if Grenfell will be recalled in 100 years.

Titanic has been used by the right wing, left wing, religious, nationalists and sociologists since it happened and will do into the future.

Fuck off with your ‘autism mums’ speech. You’ve got no idea.

The Titanic is a fascinating story
See no problem with it if it makes a child interested in our history

It's just like Grenfell OP. In fact I'd go even further than that - it's just like slavery & colonisation.