MiL gave baby first ice cream

yabvvu
Ice-cream. Really. Jeezo. Get over yourself OP

Reading your post I think objectively it is not a big deal but for me at the time this might have been one of those "I am a little annoyed, but I don't think I am right to be annoyed, but I am annoyed anyway" things. Like you, I would not say anything though. They are not parents, but they are still grandparents who love and look after their granddaughter, which as you know is not to be taken for granted, and maybe they also deserved a couple of "firsts" (which this one barely counts as) and a little autonomy. Especially if she told you with genuine joy and enthusiasm, rather than trying to antagonise you. Honestly as PP have you will barely remember or care in a few weeks. The fact that you have a "no sweets, juice" approach is slightly different and you (or, better, your DH) may want to remind her of that.

'weaning journey'[grin

You are being a bit precious

It’s kind of granny’s job to give kids sweets

Whoever thought ice cream would be a special milestone hmm

But..but... It was in a movie! 🤣

I guess that’s the trade off for getting free childcare - sometimes your child will do special things with them. MIL took my youngest for her first haircut and bought her her first shoes. Well her first ‘proper’ shoes.

I really think if you trust someone enough to care for your child like this then you accept they’re not your nanny or ‘helper,’ they’re an involved person in the child’s life.

Also, it’s ice cream. It’s not really a milestone - you won’t be sitting when your kid is 15 and saying ‘I remember the first ever taste of ice cream you had.’ I know all mine like ice cream, but the only one I remember having it first was my oldest, because I was so religiously following the weaning and healthy eating plan week by week that my HV gave me. He was about one and I gave him a shard of wafer from my ice cream cone with a scrape of ice cream on it.

DD6 is the fourth child and probably scavenged half a sundae from a McDonald’s bin somewhere for her first ice cream.

I can see why you are upset, I went back to work and felt gutted by everything I was missing, but yes yabu, you are going to miss lots of firsts that's just the crap of a working mum, you can't cover everything, I remember being gutted that I'd missed the first library song time and pretty sure I missed the first steps, my mother refused to give baby the food I sent and re cut it and swapped it for other things, bloody annoying but hey you just have to realise thats part of having someone else look after your child, they won't do it exactly as you want, family won't, childminders won't, a nursery won't, you have to realise that whoever you have you are going to be out of control with your own child to some degree and you will miss out on some things because what is important to one isn't to another.

OP - I get why you feel the way you do and it does feel like a big deal, but YABU as you have probably gathered. There will be loads of other first reactions you will get to experience (even if they aren't traditional "firsts" or important to others on here). I actually think you can try and look at it in a way that it was a nice thing for your MIL to get to experience and as she obviously dotes on your DC it is probably something she will really fondly remember.

OP probably best not to post on AIBU about such stuff?

Clymene some of these posters are taking the piss. That's bullying. She's a first time mother (presumably?). I think people on here forget what they were like when they had newborns. Although it's an internet forum so could be hairy arsed men posting for all we know. Anyone can post and poke fun.

Ice cream is nice and soft, a baby would almost certainly like it. I think it is excellent that the op's daughter has had some and don't see that it matters who gave it to her.

Are you due back at work soon? Could that be triggering your feelings of missing out - just a thought?

I wondered this. It does funny things to you... I became extremely emotional at this time. So did many of my friends when they went through it. Then there were a few who were itching to get back to work and breezily waved their babies off with a sigh of relief. Funny how we all react so differently to this stuff.

And here it is again

"AIBU? Tell me, I can take it!"

"Yes, yes you are"

"NO I AM NOT!!!!!"

Oh for goodness sake!

You'll need to give your MIL list of milestone foods LOL. Also what are milestone foods? Chips, burgers, chocolate, lollipop, how so you decide?

I still remember my twin boys having their first ever ice cream. It was a truly revolting spectacle and most of the ice cream ended up on them / on the buggy! Please don't sweat this - you might feel (briefly) wistful that you weren't there BUT honestly, being there is overrated in many cases. Are you due back at work soon? Could that be triggering your feelings of missing out - just a thought?

Let's not minimise and downplay bullying by using it to describe criticism.

Get a grip

YABVU