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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel like fucking crying?

419 replies

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 15:15

My partner has a stomach bug. He caught it off the kids and he's had a couple of accidents.

Came in from work today to find the house stinking of shit. It's everywhere - our bed is going to have to be replaced, the bedroom carpet is ruined, it's on the stair carpet and the hall carpet downstairs.

I've just spent 45mins scrubbing the (tiny) bathroom because there was shit literally everywhere.

Can't really afford to buy a new bed but the mattress is heavily stained, now on both sides. It's going to cost hundreds for that and the carpets. Genuinely feel like crying my eyes out. Probably not helped by the fact he's doing nothing to help (like putting his soiled clothes in the shower rather than just leaving them). I've got piles of washing to do still too.

Aibu to be utterly fed up?

OP posts:
Original poster
WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:51

@SummerHouse

The pile of it though. I can't get past this. It's not the splats of someone running for the loo. It's as though he has squatted and gone for it. Although he is clearly very ill. Yes, I zoomed in.

I think I would have to have a debrief with him in how this came to pass. When he is better of course.

How is he OP?

He honestly seems a lot better! No diarrhea since this morning afaik. He looks better too.
OP posts:
Herani · 06/04/2022 18:50

…or even a borrowed carpet cleaner

Herani · 06/04/2022 18:50

Oh god, the very thought that a rented carpet cleaner is being used for something infectious like this, let alone the fecal bacteria.

I do sympathise OP, but someone with diarrhoea that bad should know to camp out in the bathroom after one, at most two, accidents.

Original poster
WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:48

@SummerHouse

I understand you've got to do what you've got to do op. But this has put me off hiring a Rug Dr. I thought the worst thing was the overwhelming smell of wet dog with last one we hired. Confused
Don't worry, it belongs to my sister and will be well cleaned before I send it back! And yep, she knows what I need it for.

If I could get the carpet up and out by myself I wouldn't bother trying to clean it, honestly!

OP posts:
SummerHouse · 06/04/2022 18:46

The pile of it though. I can't get past this. It's not the splats of someone running for the loo. It's as though he has squatted and gone for it. Although he is clearly very ill. Yes, I zoomed in.

I think I would have to have a debrief with him in how this came to pass. When he is better of course.

How is he OP?

AthenaPopodopolous · 06/04/2022 18:43

Scrape as much with a spoon and then get a carpet cleaner or rent one. Poor think OP

justforthisnow · 06/04/2022 18:43

That's not normal behaviour. He should have camped out by the loo if it was that bad. Does the Vax owner know their machine is going to be used to clean up someone elses infectious faeces?

Zazdar · 06/04/2022 18:41

Sounds awful for you but if he is a grown man I genuinely don't understand how it can be all over the house 😷

Roomba?

AthenaPopodopolous · 06/04/2022 18:39

This could be salmonella poisoning, he needs stools tested. It’s a very dangerous infection and he will have no bowel control

winterchills · 06/04/2022 18:37

Sounds awful for you but if he is a grown man I genuinely don't understand how it can be all over the house 😷

daphnedoo12 · 06/04/2022 18:36

As an adult, if he is having this many accident he may need further medical help because I don't think that's normal.

I've had a stomach bug, they're truly awful so I do sympathise with you but I don't understand how an adult has had that many and why there would be faeces on the floor and around the house

DrBrennerFan · 06/04/2022 18:35

I was poorly with stomach bug last year I went through pants tiny accidents nothing huge but made sure No mess was left, I cleaned up after myself.

TwiggletLover · 06/04/2022 18:34

This doesn't make much sense. Our household all had neurovirus pretty badly. There was no shit anywhere in the house. Also we were capable of cleaning up any mess that was made. We had to be as there was no one else to do it. Your oh should be clearing up the mess he has made.

SpaghettiNotCourgetti · 06/04/2022 18:30

I hope he's really abjectly sorry for making you do this. I would be beyond mortified if I ever shat my entire fucking house and left it to my spouse to clean up.

grossnessewwww · 06/04/2022 18:29

Tell him to get off his lazy arse and do it himself.

Is he the DC dad? If not, LTB.

How could your be attracted to man who leaves his shit for your to clean up. How disrespectful of him.

SummerHouse · 06/04/2022 18:26

I understand you've got to do what you've got to do op. But this has put me off hiring a Rug Dr. I thought the worst thing was the overwhelming smell of wet dog with last one we hired. Confused

Original poster
WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:22

I'll be honest, the bedroom carpet hasn't been cleaned yet. I'm borrowing a Vax and will do it tomorrow. It is soaked in spray carpet shampoo stuff and covered with bags though!

OP posts:
mamabr · 06/04/2022 18:17

You are absolutely not being unreasonable!
It's ok to have accidents but that's taking it to a whole new level.
He shouldn't be having accidents on the bed or the carpets and if he's that bad that he can't prevent it then he needs to wear an adult nappy.
It's totally unfair on you. It sounds like he's not trying to do anything about it, like putting puppy pads on the bed etc to stop it from staining.

oioimatey · 06/04/2022 18:13

Wtf am I reading here? I would absolutely blimmin' apoplectic at his behaviour, whether he's sick or not.

Camp in the bathroom for all I care. Don't shit in the rest of the house.

ilovebagpuss · 06/04/2022 18:12

I dont understand really? We had noro whole house young children no one got shit all over the house?
Even if its running out of you surely clothes will catch it, pants and PJ bottoms?
As everyone else has commented you just stay in the loo if you have no bowel control at all? Like if i had an accident in bedroom I would contain it and grab towel not run up and down stairs making more mess.
I do feel for you having to clean it up.

Pumperthepumper · 06/04/2022 18:11

@stuntbubbles somebody asked me a question about the picture. That was my reply.

Sapphireskies · 06/04/2022 18:11

How has he done it all over the house- he just needs to make it to the toilet?!

whenwillthemadnessend · 06/04/2022 18:10

The only time this has happened to me was with my dog!!

I'd be fuming if he really can't make it to a bloody loo he needs to camp out in the bathroom.

stuntbubbles · 06/04/2022 18:09

@Pumperthepumper

The link still isn’t working for me.
Let it go, let it gooooooo Can't hold it back anymore (like OP’s husband’s bowels)

Why do you want to see diarrhoea so badly?

chocolateorangeinhaler · 06/04/2022 18:09

Put an adult pad on him.

Hire a carpet cleaner

Buy a new mattress

It's life. I once cried when the dog tipped over a bowl of water in the kitchen after I had washed the floor. It dried, it wasn't the end of the world. Your house won't stink forever, he didn't do it on purpose.