To think that people think less of me for being a crier.

This might be completely wrong but if it doesn't resonate with you, it might help someone in a similar position. It might be worth seeing if you have sinus problems. The pressure can make your face feel very much like you've been crying, like swollen under eyes. In turn this makes you think something is wrong, it must be because you feel like you have been crying. In turn this then makes you think you need to cry. It may well be that when you are stressed the pressure gets worse and prompts you to cry. It's easy then to get in a cycle of crying in these situations because that what always happens. It took me ages to realise that my chronic sinus condition was the reason I couldn't stop crying.

I think it probably is anxiety based and you're probably just quite an emotional person (I'm the exact same). I really can't stress how much better my life has been since going on antidepressants but I do understand they're not for everyone

I'm like this or was in the past. I'm very sensitive and cry easily. It's got better as I've got older. Like others, antidepressants do help. I wouldn't necessarily recommend them just for this, I'm on them for depression, but they are a welcome side effect. Basically they numb your emotions. Not everyone's cup of tea but can help.

I meant for you. This sounds horrible and not pleasant to cope with at all.

I used to be like this! Cried at everything and honestly it's embarrassing and exhausting but there was nothing I could do about it

Honest answer is that going on a low dose of SSRI's is the only thing that helped, I didn't go on them for that, I went on for anxiety but it's a side effect that I'm incredibly grateful for!

Maybe you’re a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person. It manifests in different ways. Like when someone else is humiliated, I want the floor to swallow me up as well. I can’t look at people’s wounds etc, I will literally cover my eyes rather than look. I’d rather I was hurt instead of a loved one, even emotional hurt or embarrassment.

However, I am pretty ruthless in my job (corporate). So it doesn’t mean you are weak.

An antidepressant could help with this. I'm not a crier just suffer depression and anxiety and have been on medication for it. Since being on the medication I find it very hard to cry

I would ask for a referral to have your hormone levels checked, because it sounds like an imbalance to me. Especially if it’s affecting your day to day ability to get on with life.

People who cry more easily aren’t always “just sensitive”, there is actually a hormone that increases emotional response and means some people are genuinely unable to inhibit tears. More of this hormone is, unsurprisingly, found in women than in men, but obviously to varying extents. It’s not just women being “too sensitive”!

Can’t remember the name of it now but there’s bound to be some decent researchers amongst mumsnetters…

I’m a crier too. I cry when I get mad or frustrated. I cry regularly at work with pride/happiness, I work in an SEN school and when a child in my class does something new or special, I cry. The girls at work laugh at me good naturedly.

Therapy will be tricky (amd make you cry!) And examine all the reasons you cry. But be so worth it.

Wow, I could have written all of this, including about the blushing. I can't tell you how good it feels to see someone else is the same (sorry!). I've recently been diagnosed with ADHD, so I'm not sure if that's related. I have considered some sort of therapy but I just can't bring myself to do it.

Same here @SignOnTheWindow - I rage cry with my ASD, it's a coping mechanism I've developed to avoid punching someone (which I did as a child).

You think this level of emotion is normal? Or even nice to live with?

I wouldn't want to handle this professionally it's not my responsibility.
And socially it could be emotionally draining.

Someone shouldn't need a label or a diagnosis to be accepted socially with all their quirks.

Isn't crying supposed to be the body's way of dealing with pent up emotions? There's a difference between the chemical makeup of emotion tears and the tears induced through cutting onions, for e.g. So it sounds as if some therapy might help you to find different ways to process your emotions.
My daughter (diagnosed with ASD) cries uncontrollably in moments of stress or overwhelm, so I can empathise with how difficult this must make things for you.
Xx

(((DrTeddyAltman))) (btw my daughter and I have binged Greys and are nearly caught up!!!)

So if you're comfortable you're okay. But not comfortable would be seniority or regulating emotion perhaps?

You can access some counselling (6-8) qeeks free through iapt (has different names in different areas) without going through a GP.

I really think it would be worth getting some help. Some work around boundaries and emotions and confidence and anxiety? It could make a huge difference x

Gosh that's hard. I come from a family of happy sobbers. Am one myself. But since I've had kids I literally cannot be in the same room as a wailer. I'm not sure if that differentiation means anything to anyone else. Happily kids are all teens now.

I'm a crier and I hate it.. Don't mind so much if its over something actually sad but when it's through pride or just retelling an old story I feel my eyes well up then end up trying not to blink!

I remember I had an interview where I was offered the job there and then and my eyes welled up. The interviewer said to me 'are you crying' I said nope just really happy and brushed it off as it was an exhausting day!

Have you ever visited the Sistine chapel?

Christ, poor you - how exhausting.

But I'm not reading your description as you being someone who is simply over-emotional or dramatic, it sounds clinical to me - i.e it's a physical response that you have no control over, like an extreme form of blushing. So talk of "building resilience" is pointless.

I once had an adrenaline reaction to dental anaesthetic and that made me cry uncontrollably for no reason. In the situations you describe your body is producing an excess of something, surely?

Worth a chat with a GP perhaps, to see if it's some sort of condition? Just say at the start that you're going to cry!

In solidarity though, I once managed a woman who was being horribly bullied by our senior manager (mine and hers, I was her line manager). She was so broken and I was so angry for her distress that I found myself crying in sympathy when I had to virtually drag her back to her desk after she had period off work with stress and had her HR interview. Embarrassing (and no help at all to her) but she was grateful that I cared.

You day it is easier when you're more confident? Is it a lack of confidence? A social anxiety?
Do you not cry around your friends because you are confortable with them?

What job do you do? Is it really not a problem you cry when you talk to people at work?

Do you cry on your own or just ok interactions with people? Is it something about interacting and managing other people’s emotions/expectations that makes you cry?

I think I would see someone. You can self refer for cbt which might be of some help?

This sounds quite extreme and I realise its become your "normal" but your kids wont want you crying every time you talk to their teacher etc.

Is it extreme anxiety? Or fear of authority? Or fear of criticism? I really do think there would be counselling help outthere for this.

It must be horrible for you 💐. I really hope you can access some help after all this time.