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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this cartoon is NOT appropriate for an 11-year-old!?

132 replies

CowboyJo · 23/01/2022 21:31

So my eldest daughter is 11 and has started high school a few months ago. She's always been quite 'nerdy' in terms of her interests and has made a small group of friends into the same kind of things (Roblox, Pokemon, manga and drawing)

They sound nice enough girls from what she tells me (though slightly pampered) but ever since she's started at that school, the amount of times I had to tell her off for swearing recently was disgraceful.

Anyway while monitoring my daughter's iPad found she was really into this particular cartoon she loved. I don't know if its called Hazzun Hotel or Helluva Boss because its under both names(?) but I'm sure it's the same show. It looks like a child's show on the surface but I closely watched some of the episodes and it was absolutely shocking: loads of casual effing and blinding, crude jokes(like sex and bdsm, prostitutes).

When I found this out I talked to my daughter about it and told her it wasn't an appropriate thing for someone her age to be watching, but she argued back like "But all my friends watch it! We're not babies anymore!" etc. etc.

I spoke to DH about it and he thinks I was over the top to ban her from watching the cartoon completely because she loves it, just as long as she doesn't repeat the behaviours. But I'm not happy with that.

I'm not stupid I know she wouldn't of picked up the swearing from that show alone, but it really isn't content I'm happy to let her watch. The show has NOT FOR KIDS in each video so DD knows she shouldn't be watching it.

But am I being unreasonable to forbid her completely from watching it?

OP posts:
JugglingJanuary · 24/01/2022 00:52

How exactly do you propose the 'ban' will work?

TooBigForMyBoots · 24/01/2022 00:27

YANBU @CowboyJo. However YAB Unrealistic if you think you can stop her watching inappropriate content.

I think you and her dad should take this opportunity to talk to her about what she sees on the internet. It will be a conversation that will continue throughout her teens.🤦‍♀️

LemonSwan · 24/01/2022 00:22

I just skimmed through the Hasbin Hotel pilot. Yeah that really doesn't look appropriate at all!

I think I would rather an 11yo watch squid games than that tbh.

negomi90 · 24/01/2022 00:18

The risk of you banning things, especially things her friends are watching is that you cut off communication.
You can ban it, she can watch stuff with her friends on their phones at school. She can't talk to you about it if she's found something disturbing or interesting because she'll get in trouble for watching it.
She'll move on to the next thing and go to more effort to hide it from you so you can't ban it.
The thing you can't do is physically stop her watching it if she wants to (unless you keep her locked in the house at all times forever). I'd rather my kid didn't hide things, so I could watch the stuff I don't want them watching with them to talk to them about it. I'd rather not risk shutting down communication. I don't want my kid upset about something they've seen and not talking to me about, because of fear of getting in trouble for watching something they shouldn't. That would be my fear from banning it.

GiftWrappingLikeItsXmasEve · 24/01/2022 00:07

With an 11 year old, you very much are still the parent. So if you think this is inappropriate, you tell her so, block access and carry on. You can ask her opinion, but if all she can plead her case with is “all my friends watch it” then that would be a definite no from me.

ThirdElephant · 24/01/2022 00:04

@VioletPetals

Hazzun Hotel and Helluva Boss are two separate shows, they are not made for kids, like Rick and morty, or back in the day family guy and American dad, king of the hill, Ren and stimpy … you get the idea. They are cartoons for older teen/adults. I’m pretty sure the rating for them is 15.

Definitely not appropriate for a 12 year old.

Wait... Ren and Stimpy wasn't for kids?? That explains so much! I am sure it was on a kids TV channel when I was growing up though and I really found it disturbing.
Craftgirlx · 24/01/2022 00:00

I understand you feeling unhappy about the themes of the programme but I don’t think you ‘banning’ it is the best approach. I would have an open conversation with her about prostitution and BDSM, make sure she understands it and see if she has questions. She will know about it anyway from friends and school and unfortunately swearing will definitely already be part of her life! I wasn’t allowed to swear in the house at that age but did with my friends. My parents would let me watch programmes and encouraged open conversations. I still had rules to follow but being allowed somethings will stop your DD from hiding everything else from you too. If you are going to act this badly over a tv show, is she likely to come to you with a real problem like smoking/drugs/boys? It’s shocking what young ones are exposed to now but high school is a real eye opener and I think you should approach this cautiously so you don’t push her away and encourage her to keep things from you (for fear of you ‘banning’ them)..

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:48

Introduce her to something new and hopefully the rest will follow. Maybe watch some trailers all of these are on either Netflix/Disney

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:46

The last kids on earth

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:44

Hilda
A tale of dark and grim

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:43

Amphibian

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:42

Kipo silly auto correct

Missingindevon · 23/01/2022 23:41

Here's some good alternatives
She ra (epic and great strong women)
Centureworld (crazish lots of song fun and darkish)
Dragon prince
Owl house
Adventure time
Kipp
Bob's burgers

Winniewonka · 23/01/2022 23:27

12A means a film can only be watched by a child under the age of 12 IF accompanied by an adult.

PG refers to a film that your child might find scary but others won't, hence parental guidance.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 23/01/2022 23:25

Ah here comes the cool mum

I prefer to say realistic.

The stuff that actually goes on in and around secondary schools is too scary for the parents who believe a few bad words (of which they will have only heard a handful) and a cartoon that's hardly hentai are a horror that must be quashed at all costs.

angelikacpickles · 23/01/2022 23:06

12a films and shows are very often watched by younger audiences, as they're for children - since I hope we can all be sensible and agree the mental difference between an 11 and 12 year old is non existent

This makes no sense. Obviously, whoever decided on the rating scheme thinks there is a difference between what is suitable for 11 and 12 year olds, or the rating would be 11A. And if there's no difference between an 11 and 12 year old, is there a difference between a 10 and 11 year old?

nancy75 · 23/01/2022 22:53

my DH used to be a heavy swearer (he's Australian) 😂😂😂

Phewthatwasclose · 23/01/2022 22:52

Not ideal (understatement!) but as a pp says, unless you lock her up til she’s 18, you won’t be able to stop her being exposed to this stuff. For what it’s worth my friends and I all watched completely inappropriate stuff all the time, and are all sensible professionals in good relationships now, so……

aristotlesdeathray · 23/01/2022 22:48

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

I am simply pointing out that your comment is irrelevant.
Hardly irrelevant

You claimed they were 15+

One is

The other isn't

12a films and shows are very often watched by younger audiences, as they're for children - since I hope we can all be sensible and agree the mental difference between an 11 and 12 year old is non existent

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 23/01/2022 22:46

I am simply pointing out that your comment is irrelevant.

aristotlesdeathray · 23/01/2022 22:45

Also there is more than one parent involved in this decision who thinks otherwise

aristotlesdeathray · 23/01/2022 22:45

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

The OP's child is 11, not 12. And parent seems to have decided that her guidance says "no".
Ooh one whole year

Get a grip

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 23/01/2022 22:44

The OP's child is 11, not 12. And parent seems to have decided that her guidance says "no".

aristotlesdeathray · 23/01/2022 22:43

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

Children over 15.
One of them yes

The other is a 12a

So suitable for children the OPs child's age and below with parental guidance

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 23/01/2022 22:43

Children over 15.

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