To not want my 19 year old moving to Canada alone?

I left home at 17, had a great job my own place. When job opportunities came up I moved with them. Now that want quite as far as Canada but I did move from Aberdeen all the way down to Maidstone on a whim with nothing and no-one, it's was one of the happiest most freeing times of my young life. She's 19 there's literally zero you can do about it and to pressure her out of it would be so wrong.
Perhaps ask her for the name of the agency and maybe even the Facebook group so that you can have a look for yourself, dig around a bit. Check out the legalities surrounding getting her back if she isn't enjoying it etc etc, facts keep me calm so having all the info would put my mind at rest. It's normal for you to be worried and scared but part of you should be excited for her. At least she's working and not on a two year jolly.

Sounds exciting and she is showing a lot of initiative. I immigrated to a different country with a backpack at the age of 22. She will have an adventure.

Really pleased you are coming round, you sound like a great mum.
Sorry about the dh but just ignore him as much as you can. My own mother was deeply unhappy about me going to Japan to teach English but coped!

Live your life to give your children wings so they can fly. She will get great memories. Whistler is amazing. Tips are good too. She may come back (likely) though may stay and if she does, you will see her for quality time together. If gc come along then you may be in a position to visit for extended periods so concentrate your life on getting your finances in order to have the luxury of being able to afford the visits. We lost a son to america for a year but he came back enriched plus we have great memories of meeting up with him out there

It’s great that you’ve come round, shame about dh, but she’s an adult and he doesn’t get to tell her she can’t go. If she goes without his unnecessary “blessing” she’ll be fine. She’ll be too busy working and enjoying herself to mope about him.
He will have 2 choices: continue being a twat and make her not want to see him or talk to him, or decide to be proud and supportive and have a daughter who still loves him.

This reminds of Educating Rita. Of course you should encourage your daughter to spread her wings, she sounds brilliant. I am from a similar background and ended up in Oz after many adventures. My life has been so full of fun and open horizons, I would never have stayed in my home town, and I doubt your daughter will either. I have a 20 year old son, I have encouraged him to do a degree where working abroad is easy, as I want him to really live his life, and I know he will leap at the opportunity to travel when Covid calms down a bit. Your husband sounds pretty awful, I am sure he must have redeeming qualities, but he needs to give himself a good shake, or he will lose his adventurous and brave daughter.

She met the love of her life there and she expecting there first baby. My daughter been there now 14 years.

Ske has an amazing life. A far better one than she could get in the U.K. My daughter is also in hospitality. They love the British accent out there.

My late husband was from an ex mining area so I know the mentality and how the men especially can be.

My husband escaped it. He didn't want that life. He aeen how his sister and other 2 brothers are. He and one other brother got out.

I was never quite forgiven for taking my husband away from where he was born and bought up. That was made clear when he unexpectedly passed away. Ofcourse I dragged him kicking and wreaking! Not! Ha

Supporting your daughter is exactely what she needs. Ignore your husband. He is acting like a spoilt child who can't get his own way.

He has to learn: its not his life to lead. When he starts just tell him to stop it. Tell your swifter not to try and talk him round and just let him have his perpetual sulk.

Go out on tour on your own if needs be. You would probably have a better time than going with a grumpy sulky husband. Look at it as new adventures for you

We are incredibly lucky to live in a time when it's s small world, with Facetime, Zoom, Skype, and so on. Flights to Canada depending where she is can average 8 hours plus. Fortunately I can fly right in to where my daughter lives.

It's a beautiful country. 2 of my adult sons are still here. They haven't all left me. Ha

Best flight companies are Canadian Affair.Dont pay exonerate flight fees. We generally got/get out there for around £400 each from Manchester.

Check your prices and deals. Enjoy it with her. If your husband wants to be a bleep leave him to it

It's fun and exciting for you both. She will get amazing opportunities out there

I remember back in the dim and distant past being engaged when I was 20 and thinking about going back to college. My fiance's parents were so weird about it. Told me I had to concentrate on working and getting on the list for a council house. It seemed so utterly unambitious. I realise now it was that same kind of blinkered thinking about earning money now being better than not earning but having more potential later. The aim to get a council house rather than working towards anything else was also incredibly depressing.

I'm so glad you're really behind her now and planning your own visit to see her. Your husband will likely not want to go so better steel yourself for the moaning when he realises you're tootling off for a holiday! He won't want to go, of course, so you must go on your own and have a blast.

He needs to be very careful or he will drive her away - does he realise that?

My mum's DP (who was in my life since I was young) was similar to your DH.

He thought everyone should work from 16 (because that's what he did), he thought uni was a waste of time and when I said I wanted to go and do a working holiday in Australia he laughed at me, rolled his eyes, and told me what a stupid idea it was.

My mum was sad and said she'd miss me but that it was an amazing opportunity and I should go.

I went, it was everything I hoped it was and it gave me the drive to carve out a different life for myself. I now have my own business and am really proud of the life I'm living.

Admittedly he wasn't my dad, but when I left for Australia I had zero interest in carrying on any contact with him. His attitude just wasn't one I could get on board with and I hated that he was dragging my mum down with his boring ideas.

Maybe once she's out there and having a fantastic time and doing well he'll be able to come round to the idea a bit?

I'm from London dual nationality dad's from Vancouver and yes if she wanted to be a social worker it's not just qualifications but limited jobs in parts of Canada. Vancouver has a population of a qtr of London. But in the service industry experience will matter more and you can work your way up. Every part I've been to knocks the stress of London out of myself. I would say moving to London is more dangerous, in Vancouver it's rare for really bad stuff to happen people are still shocked were as in London a lot of crimes don't even hit the news. I've lived there on a student exchange and it's the kinda place you can work out easily not like somewhere like New York. I love the UK Canada is so beautiful and unique miss it so much at times....My neighbor in London they both come from small towns where everyone has kids by 25 and they have a very solid marriage and great relationship with parents still. Still speaks to her mum at least 5 days a week. So focus on the strengths you have given her and she will carry them with her. To be honest their degree was only just worth doing in terms of pay. They could of got a job in a supermarket and worked their way up and be on more than what a dancer gets teaching for a to London school......I hated school but excelled in work just as I had the motivation and people like that a lot of others just work enough to get paid. would most likely more to Toronto as has more of the jobs I do even in London a degree would help for speclist jobs but has never stopped me gaining skills.

Your husband sounds like a ghastly misogynist sexist pig. I would tell him to change his attitude quick smart or you'll move to Canada as well with her. Seriously what a horrible, loathsome little man with no drive, no ambition and anti-social and misogynist beliefs. Does he have any positive traits? I could not stay married to him, I would grow to resent him and hate him. He is trying to break your daughter's spirit. And his attitude of not looking at her phone is that of an immature 9 year old, so he is immature to boot. This would be LTB level for me. His attitude would depress me and break me, let alone my daughter. He'd be changing his attitude quick smart if I were you! He doesn't have to love the idea but he needs to accept it and not drive a wedge between him and his daughter.

Your DD sounds bloody brilliant!!

Of everyone I grew up with, it wasn't the academic ones who followed the traditional route that did really well, it was typically the ones who didn't need university and who just went for it who are now living in million pound homes in my city.

I think it can be very hard for some people to see beyond their experience and assumptions about what "success" is. For your DH, it is stability, familiarity, family close by. Nothing wrong with that. For you it is maybe the same but the difference between the 2 of you is that you can see that "success" or fulfilment can come in another shape too. You can adjust your expectations. Maybe your DH can too, with some time and effort. But it's not your or your DD's job to make him comfortable with that. You can respect his view without agreeing with it. And you can expect home to extend the same courtesy.

I would bet he is terrified of losing his girl and once he acknowledges that, and realises he can't stop it form happening, he'll get on board. And when she makes a massive success of it, he'll pretend he never had any doubts....

I know exactly the kind of home town and dad. I know you can see it but make sure no matter what she knows she always has you to talk to no matter what anyone else around her saying. She will come in for shit from all corners, including her dad if he doesn't wise up. She needs to know you believe in her. As you so clearly do. It's lovely to read your wonder and pride.

My mum was 19 in 1964 when she went to the US as an au pair, after answering an ad in "The Lady" magazine.

Remember, no mobiles or internet, expensive landline calls, and most correspondence with family was snail mail. We are still friends with that family.

Your DD has done her research, and as long as she has enough savings to get herself home quickly if needed, I'd say don't clip her wings.

It sounds great. Let her fly. She clearly wants to!

Bravo to her!

If she's on the East Coast and ever need a brew she can pop round to mine!

😊😁

Canada is a great place to go. You will have to accept that she has every right to choose her life and she seems very level-headed. Yes it will be a wrench but surely you can just be proud of her for not choosing to do the same as you. Its clearly not her way. Support her and don't make her feel guilty for wanting to determine her life her way. I promise you, you will be the losers if you try to put her off or infect her with your fears. She sounds great.

Sounds amazing. I had a two year working visa for Canada but I didn't go until I was 21, and I spent 6 months working and traveling in the US before going to Canada. I'd wind back time and go back in a heartbeat!

In my opinion, it'll be the making of her. My DSis lives in Vancouver and it's bloody awesome. I can't answer for the rest of the country or city, but East Van in particular seems a really close knit community.

The city isn't overwhelmingly large, just beautiful. You should let her go, so you can visit