‘Never get another animal’ - AIBU?

@Astrak Did you mean to post that here? This is a four year old thread and your post doesn’t seem to match the topic.

If it was a mixup you can report it and ask MN to remove it or move it somewhere else.

(MN is also welcome to delete this post once it’s sorted so the old thread doesn’t stay bumped up.)

Generally, I prefer animals to people. They are more reliable, honest and straightforward.

I have a 30yrs old retired purebred Crabbet Arabian gelding on full livery with his very knowledgeable breeder. She is difficult and demanding - the horse is not. Each month, he costs me all of my professional pension. Some months, it is more. He's aged out of his comprehensive insurance, so anything that he needs, health wise, I pay for. I don't begrudge him a penny of it. We have enjoyed many happy times together - he was a successful Grade B HOYS showjumper for a number of years, and an excellent hack after he retired from that. Now he's a pampered pet, being looked after by an expert. I see him twice a week and take carrots for him and his little herd of relatives, and gin and flowers for the yard owner, and biscuits for her grooms.
My cat, who is twenty months old, was bought as a kitten for a child who was, sadly, terminally ill. When she died, the family couldn't bear to see him in the house and put him on Pre-Loved. My previous cat had just been pts due to lung and heart failure. He too, had been insured to the hilt with a highly reputable pet insurance company. They paid out everything except for his cremation costs.

This cat, who is an indoor cat, has the run of the whole house and tears madly round it. He climbs up the curtains, rushes up and down stairs, plays with his many interactive toys and sleeps on my bed, on one of my old sheepskin coats. He's also insured to the hilt with the previous insurance company. He also has a monthly-paid subscription to his veterinary clinic health care insurance. The latter covers flea and worm treatment, two full health checks a year and his yearly innoculations. The cost of both of these subscriptions is £40 per month.
I think that it's a wholly reasonable amount. I live by myself in a rural area with very few neighbors, all of whom who have family members to support them. I don't. My cat is excellent company, even when he's being an annoying little sh*t!
I have a monthly subscription to the Cat's Protection Society and if I die, he will be responsibly removed by them.

A lot of people go way too far the other way imo and don’t rehome for their sake when it absolutely would be the best thing for their pet.

I think a lot of people do t bother with insurance - but also don’t bother putting money aside.

Personally, I will always insure. It means I know my monthly outgoings and I never need to worry about decisions as it’s lifetime cover.

But I also “get” those who don’t insure, but pay into a savings find instead so that they have a buffer if something goes wrong.

No sympathy whatsoever for anyone who doesn’t do either option. If you can’t afford to cover a pets possible illness, then £not get a blooming pet.

I think the point is as a responsible owner you should have a fund set away for pet emergencies

A lot of these people who dump animals at the drop of a hat, don’t have proper, or any insurance which would cover them in a lot of situations with emergency boarding fees etc.

The thought that a 6 week period of inconvenience makes a pet disposable, is exactly the problem

Kk789 well, I assumed we had that bond and that she’d be desperately unhappy without me.

Humph.

So yes perhaps in that situation there was nothing you could have done, but you shouldn’t have been in that situation. In my opinion it’s a little irresponsible to get a pet in the first place when you’re in rented accommodation and planning to move with no set out plan for the pet in between.

Tbh I think not getting another pet should be everyone’s default. It should take a lot of thought before bringing a pet into a family including insurance and contingencies if things go wrong… I mean obviously easier with a goldfish than a horse but the same principle applies. I have a family member who got a dog saying their parents would look after it if they were away but they always holiday together and end up trying to guilt other family members into house sitting and looking after the dog which is ridiculous to me. Others got guinea pigs and then had to rehome them 6 months later when they were TTC as apparently they did no research before hand and didn’t realize pregnant women were meant to avoid them

Our dogs died, I'd love another one, but I recognise where I am right now I don't have the ability to give a dog or cat the proper care and love it deserves, so we don't have pets.

People in a flat/small house might think it’s better to get a small dog rather than a larger dog.

When choosing a dog, it’s never just about the size. You need to look at what the breed is “designed” to do. And does that breed, with its inherent characteristics, fit in with your lifestyle?

Smaller dog breeds often need way more exercise than giant breeds. And, often need more training re manners. I tend to find that owners of larger breeds have taught manners much more than those with smaller dogs.

I'm glad people are more responsible about pets these days, but I think things have swung too far the other way. Pets are not kids, and rehousing them does not have to be traumatic. They can adjust very easily. I have inherited a number of dogs over the years. All of them could have conceivably stayed with the original owners, but for various reasons I was able to offer them a better quality of life, and I don't think less of the original owners for it.

I’d say that sentiment is correct in a lot of the posts I’ve seen. More so when it comes to cats, rather than dogs. The posts re cats often come across as them being far more disposable.

The fact that you had a 6 week gap makes me feel a bit sick. I’d have moved heaven and earth to find a way around this.

That is definitely not my pet. She isn't like anyone else the way she is with me. I will never rehome her. She is family and I am in it thick and thin. When I was in hospital for an extended period, my mum had her. If I hadn't had my mum around, I would have found a friend to take her in, or paid whoever I needed to. I know she missed me when I was gone and that a bit of food from someone new could never replace her mum.

I'm sorry if you don't have a bond like that. It is the best, most unconditional love.

If I ever had to rehome her, I wouldn't be able to just get a new pet a few years. I'd feel too guilty for letting my lifetime commitment to her as my dependent.

A pet is a luxury and massive commitment. If you've been unable to fulfil this commitment repeatedly, stop taking on dependents you can't look after.

Just my personal opinion.

Sometimes rehoming, hard as it might be for the owner, is the best thing for the animal.
The issue is HOW the Rehoming is done - Rehoming to someone you know and trust vs relying on the generosity of charities vs selling your animal to some random on gumtree
Circumstances do change, and if the animal is unhappy Rehoming can be the right thing to do, for its sake. As long as you are sure the animal is definitely going to a better life.
I'm a vet, and have in the past advised and encouraged (and aided) Rehoming, for the animal's' sake. But I have once told someone " do not get any more animals! " when they wanted a dog euthanized for having fleas!
There are circumstances, and then there are some people who are just unsuited to having animals! There isn't a blanket rule

@Feelslikealot ah, the lowest form of wankery. Well done

You seem to be struggling to be a decent human being but we all have our problems

@Feelslikealot you’re either hard of understanding, or being purposefully obtuse. My answer was because OP STARTED THE THREAD looking for validation. The OP almost always gets the hardest time on AIBU.

RickJames not so much because she didn’t start the thread? Do you understand? Or do you need it spelt out? You seem to be struggling with a simple concept.

I do feel people are a bit over-dramatic on here. Shit happens in life and in the end we're talking about animals not children. In 2001 when I was 22 I left a partner and had to move back in with my parents. My parents wouldn't have the cats as well so they were rehomed. I was sad but trust me, I needed to prioritise myself at that time. In 2014 I got another rescue cat when I was happily married and he's curled up next to me now and is adored by me, my husband and three kids. There are lots of circumstances where it's necessary to re-home...clearly don't buy a new dog every year in the hope that it's less hard work than the last, but there are shades of grey in life.

I have re-homed a foster cat. I was clear with the adoption group that I would not accept toileting issues - the cat was then weeing everywhere which was unpleasant so I returned her to the breed specific charity in a matter of weeks.

My other cats have lived with me for their full lives and I took one all around the world with me as I lived abroad.

So no, I don't discount circumstances in needing to re-home a pet. However, I decided that I would only get kittens after that incident, so I could deal with behaviours before they got habitual.

You seem to have a more settled existence now, so I don't see why you shouldn't have pets - but perhaps go for low maintenance ones like cats.

I would say to think carefully when you decide to get another pet.

I see so many people get a large dog breed that truly needs a lot of open space and keep it locked up in their small flat all day while they work or aggressive breeds they're unwilling to train properly.

Do you have enough money to pay for 4 or 6 weeks at a kennel if needed? Money for unexpected vet bills. Money for proper training.