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Benefits of having only 1 child?

117 replies

TheOneTed · 01/10/2021 00:09

Shamelessly posting on AIBU for traffic.

I'm TTC and it's been nearly a year. I know others have been trying for far longer than me, but I'm starting to lose hope.

I already have one DD so know I am very lucky to have her. Please can people share positives about having one child? I always said I'd TTC for a year and then stop as I don't want it to become a huge stressful process and I am already late 30s.

Thank you in advance :)

OP posts:
ClemDanFango · 01/10/2021 08:05

Once you’re over the challenging stages, you’re over them! Never have to do through them again.

TheOneTed · 01/10/2021 08:05

@PaperMonster that's nice to hear!

OP posts:
SaltySheepdog · 01/10/2021 08:04

I’ve got a 5 bedroomed house for my 4 kids, if I had one child I’d only need two bedrooms and could pay off my mortgage fast

TheOneTed · 01/10/2021 08:03

Sorry I've just read that back and it sounds so negative, and also insensitive to anyone without children.

I think the extra time, money and 121 focus are all great. I was 1 of 4 (the oldest) and would have loved more attention and money! I also am very close to my SIL who has 3 and my DD is so close to them it's like they are siblings.

Also worrying about what things will be like in 20-30 years time seems anti silly really.

OP posts:
PaperMonster · 01/10/2021 08:01

My ten year old is an only and loves it - her bestie is also an only. I have an article in one of her boxes about how much more successful onlies are when in adulthood but I can’t recall how success was defined!!

TheOneTed · 01/10/2021 07:56

Thank you so much for the responses so far, they do help me feel more positive.

I know it's silly to think as my DD is only 3 , but I've always liked the idea of lots of grandchildren. I also worry we might not be close when she's older (I hope we will but you never know!) A second doubles the chances! I worry about being old and lonely 😅

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 01/10/2021 02:04

I'm an only child and had a brilliant childhood. I never once wanted a sibling.

HaveringWavering · 01/10/2021 01:55

Private school is more affordable if you are only sending one child. If that floats your, and their, boat.

FrankButchersDickieBow · 01/10/2021 01:31

@Anonymonster

All of the above for me, plus thinking well into the future..financially speaking..supporting with driving lessons, first car, supporting through university, first property, help with wedding.. if we had more than one DC we would definitely struggle to support with these thing if/when necessary.
Oh yes this aswell. We have a pretty penny saved up for our daughter when she is older. Could not have afforded that for more than her. If we did, it would have been halved and will not have the same impact on her life
avamiah · 01/10/2021 00:56

I have one child who is 11 and i had her when I was 36 and that was it for me.
I had a 3rd degree tear and couldn’t even breast feed her as I was on so many drugs so let’s just say nothing went near there for a very long time ( sorry to sound crude).
Be happy with one child that’s what I say.

BakingOfTheFoodCats · 01/10/2021 00:40

No fighting! I have 4 and it’s horrific at times, I’m sick of playing referee. Can give one all your attention, another thing I struggle with, more money. And fwiw my kids regularly tell me they wish they didn’t have siblings and it was only them, so not all kids love having siblings.

Anonymonster · 01/10/2021 00:33

All of the above for me, plus thinking well into the future..financially speaking..supporting with driving lessons, first car, supporting through university, first property, help with wedding.. if we had more than one DC we would definitely struggle to support with these thing if/when necessary.

DeborahAnnabel · 01/10/2021 00:30

For me the main thing is that you can keep a semblance of your old life without being too enmeshed in mum life. If you have two or more you may as well just embrace it. But with one, it’s possible to go to nice restaurants, holidays etc etc either with girlfriends or with husband. Far harder if you have a brood. Everything is just so much effort.

FrankButchersDickieBow · 01/10/2021 00:29

I can't think of any cons to be honest.

I am one of 5 and my husband is one of 3.

Active decision to have one.

Not sure if it's because I grew up 'poor but happy and I just wanted to be able to give dd everything I never had.

I never missed it btw and had a happy childhood, but I cannot deny, with our one kind, funny, confident, friendly, independent 12 yo daughter (almost 13), we have the life of Riley tbh.

We have the money to do whatever we want. Any clubs/hobbies she is interested in, we can afford. Theatre is one luxurious hobby of ours.

Days out, lunches etc, easy peasy.

Our bond is amazing and to be perfectly honest, I think she would be my favourite if we had any more.

Gwrach · 01/10/2021 00:22

Mine are

One child is cheaper than multiple
Parenting one child is easier than multiples
Only one child's schedule for activities
Only one child's homework to help with
All my attention can go on to one child
I don't have to pretend I don't have a favourite (yeah yeah, it happens my brother is the favourite)

Saz12 · 01/10/2021 00:21

No wierd sibling rivalry.
DD can do activities she wants whenever they crop up
Money! And time.

MarineBlue33 · 01/10/2021 00:13

You have more money to spend on your dd.
Your dad and you can really have a close relationship

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