Men in lingerie shops

I used to hate this as a teenager. I had massive boobs and was hugely self conscious (particularly as it was grown men who seemed fascinated with them rather than other 14 year old boys). In one shop a man was there with his wife...
Looking at me. I loudly told my mum that I hated men being in underwear departments, there was no need for it, surely their wives could manage to shop for bras on their own. My mum was mortified

@pleasedonttextmyman thought so.

Going back to assumption this is a storm in a c cup

@feelingmehtoday me too lol

@feelingmehtoday

I'm now just here for the adjectives used to describe men who go shopping ... Dopey, gormless, being "dragged" .... it's making my Sunday evening pass quicker

This made me laugh

I'm now just here for the adjectives used to describe men who go shopping ... Dopey, gormless, being "dragged" .... it's making my Sunday evening pass quicker

YANBU.
I'm a 44 year old female and definitely not embarrassed but it gets on my nerves so much when I'm underwear shopping and these gormless men are just following their wives/partners around. Honestly does my head in. There is no way my DH would want to follow me about when I'm shopping for underwear

Yeah you're right, lingerie shops are over run with dad's and daughters

🙈

So now you know that it makes some people uncomfortable (regardless of whether you think its right or wrong to feel that way), do you think it might be worth taking those feelings into consideration next time?

The point is that men were in a space where teenage girls and women were having bra fittings. Do you have a problem with that, or not?

No they weren't - they were outside of that space using the seating allocated for the purpose of waiting.

With regard to point number 1 - of course this is what is being suggested! That men shouldn't be in this area at all - an area that is essentially a public space. I think that's a slippery slope.

I won't continue this back and forth with you any further as I don't want to clog up the OP's thread. It's clear we have very different outlooks and opinions, which is OK.

For clarity, I think the following ... 1) that we are on dodgy ground suggesting that men don't have as equal a right as women to a public space; 2) that we would benefit from reappraising bras as first and foremost an item to support our breasts, rather than making them a weird sexualised item that people are uncomfortable to even carry to the till in the presence of men; and 3) that we would benefit from not suspecting every man who happens to be in a shop selling women's underwear of being a perve.

1. that's not being suggested
2. agree, but it's not women who are sexualising breasts/the fitting of bras/bra sizes etc.
3. I don't think every man is a perve, but I also don't agree that the problem with sex crimes is that some women do think that. However, some men are perves, and worse. We can't always tell which ones, though.

But none of that addresses the point of the OP. The point is that men were in a space where teenage girls and women were having bra fittings. Do you have a problem with that, or not?

By this logic we should definitely ban all children from shops. I find they "get in the way" more than adults if I'm honest.

Oh hang on... no. Because that's a silly argument and they have every right to be there.

This is exactly what I mean - how do we go about assessing which men have a "good enough" reason to be in a public area?

Indeed!

This is incorrect and a deliberate misinterpretation of what I said.

For clarity, I think the following ... 1) that we are on dodgy ground suggesting that men don't have as equal a right as women to a public space; 2) that we would benefit from reappraising bras as first and foremost an item to support our breasts, rather than making them a weird sexualised item that people are uncomfortable to even carry to the till in the presence of men; and 3) that we would benefit from not suspecting every man who happens to be in a shop selling women's underwear of being a perve.

I always thought these sofas were specifically designed for people to wait outside, those people who would be inappropriate to walk inside the changing rooms...

if they don’t have a good reason to be there.

so you want a lanyard for the men who you think have a good enough reason?

Why are all these men being "dragged" or "following" behind their partners like dogs on leashes? I find the use of language on this thread fascinating

Hyperbole, innit.
I also find the use of language on threads fascinating, how it's used to paint a narrative or picture.

I agree and I hate men hanging around shops waiting full stop, they get in the way in already busy shops

Lol, so now we've moved on from lingerie shops to men being in any shops in general getting in the way
Men aren't the only people who "get in the way", I've seen plenty of women dithering about in shops as well.
Or is it just men you have a problem with being in shops?

Okay. I get it. You both think a teenage girl should not have the right to bodily privacy from adult males. Fine. I disagree completely.

Why are all these men being "dragged" or "following" behind their partners like dogs on leashes? I find the use of language on this thread fascinating. I must have the only man in the world who actually enjoys shopping with me and in fact walks himself around like a grown adult instead of being "dragged"