To be desperate for 2 nights without my kids

tight??? wtaf?
GM says she's getting older and can't cope as well anymore.
how is that tight?

If you book the stay from Thursday to Saturday, could that work?
You would need annual leave from Thursday afternoon and all day Friday.
But this might take the pressure off your mum. She would only need to do the school run on Thurs pm, then Fri am/pm.
You collect the kids from hers early-ish on Saturday morning.

Apart from the last year my granddaughter has stayed with me at least 1 night a week since she was tiny. I have her for my daughter to work and also so that she gets time to herself.
My parents helped out when my children were small too. My mum would have both my children and my sister's for the weekend. Although there were plenty of time when I couldn't get a babysitter. My daughter has never had that problem

To be honest, I think it’s tight your mum won’t babysit, did her parents babysit you? My mum is the same though and I used to stay with her parents for a week!

@Jellycatspyjamas suggestion is a good stop-gap

And op I hear you. I’m desperate for a night away with my husband.

Maybe we should swop!

YANBU but neither is your mum in saying no.
My parents have never had the kids overnight either, so we’ve never been away on our own - do it seems like an unimaginable luxury to me, they’re almost old enough to leave with oldest DC in charge now.

I know that it’s not only on mumsnet but amongst almost everyone I know doesn’t have grandparents doing overnights.

YANBU. It's been a decade since we had a night on our own so I hear you!

You might be able to split them up with family friends? I think you need to stay local just in case it didn't work.

It’s not the same thing but something that has worked for me is DH and I taking a days annual leave midweek when the kids are at school. One of us gets them up and ready for school while the other gets a lie in, have the day go ourselves and leave the kids in aftercare so we’re free from 8.30-6.00 - time to relax, have a long lunch etc and lick them up at the end of the day with an easy dinner.

It’s not the same as getting away for a couple of nights, but does help recharge our batteries and give space to reconnect.

A nanny would do the hours and days you wanted. It might be better if the nanny knows your children already. For example do any of your children’s friends have a nanny who would do this as an ad hoc job. Or ask nanny to meet the children for a morning /afternoon first or join you to see bedtime routine. Not the cheapest option but if you use an experienced nanny you will have the benefit of knowing your children are well cared for and they will also have fun . A good nanny would bring games , crafts , plan specific child led activities to ensure your children also had a special time .
A word of caution don’t be tempted to use a teenager or inexperienced person for this role. They will not be aware of the safeguarding , home safety or be able to cope with the children emotional needs. Most children want their parents to do bedtime so it needs careful handling.

I'm assuming you don't have siblings nearby who could take them, or a close friend (perhaps on a reciprocal agreement)? A couple of times I looked after my niece and nephew at similar ages for the weekend for my brother and SIL.

As a Granny I am always bemused to read about grandparents not willing to do childcare . Over the years , DGS has stayed with us hundreds of times including weekends or even a week and I have wonderful memories . Hopefully DGD will stay when DD stops bf .
Sorry , no help but it puzzles me . My friends are the same as me so I am not alone !

You're not unreasonable to want a break. For some of us it's just not possible unless you employ a nanny. We had no family willing or able to have ours.

We are getting away on our own (first time ever) dc are staying with parents for one night. From about 4pm until the next lunchtime. For my 40th we took them with us but booked a babysitter who came to the hotel room for a few hours.

Alas to go away with your partner you will have to pay for childcare, which overnight is incredibly expensive and difficult to arrange.

Although on mumsnet grandparents seem to fall over themselves to have kids overnight in reality I know very few people who have that option.

It sucks but it’s life

do you live in Surrey?
I'll look after them.
I have 7 kids, won't notice another two.
not even joking.

when is the event?

Do you and DH have no other parents that your mum?

but yeah I think nanny would be your only option

YADNBU! Alone time as a couple as vitally important imo, I was lucky enough when my kids were younger to have a lot of family I could ask, it must be hard when you don't have that option. What you could do is book a not as fancy hotel and save some money to pay for a child minder, depending on how your kids would be with having someone unfamiliar look after them of course

YABVU

it should be at least a week

Yanbu to want this. My dc are 7 and 9 - dh and I have never been able to have a night away and I doubt we will until they are much older. When dd was born My dp said immediately they were too old to have her overnight, or even a few hours. My pil live far away and are not well. No other close relatives who are engaged with the kids.

It is hard and I didn't realise what a difference it would make until we had dc and saw other gp looking after their babies just a few months in.

My sister has 3 dc (10, 4 and 3). She splits them up as the 2 smallest are hard together. Usually I get one, my parents get one and her partners parents get one. Absolutely no issues, this way dsis gets her break and all the dc get some one on one attention.

If you have anyone else to ask, do this and have your break!

Years ago there used to be a rather expensive children's hotel in London; a safe dumping ground for those who could afford it!
Not sure what happened to it - but what a brilliant idea!