AIBU to not let my dd9 watch 12 films

My DS aged 12 has watched Stranger Things which I think is a 15. I wouldn't let him watch a 15 rated horror though or anything overly sexual but I think some mild sex scenes are OK. It depends on the child and the rating is intended as a guide only. I wouldn't watch an 18 film and I'm 33, because they are usually full of gore.

Agree it depends on the film. There’s a website which talks about appropriateness which I find helpful.

www.commonsensemedia.org/

Just search whichever film.

I have let my 8-year-old watch a Spider-Man 12, and he was fine, but I don’t think I would have let him any younger and I think he’d have got more out of it if he’d waited - but maybe not as the Spider-Man phase is a certain age, so I don’t know. No regrets about it though! He loved it and had no nightmares!

I would allow my 9 year old to watch that. He’s pretty hardy tbh.

DS is 10 and I generally allow it. There isn't much that's ok for a 12yo child but horribly inappropriate for a 9yo child as far as films go, imo.

A great deal of 12 certificates would have been 12a in the cinema, so its really down to the parent to decide based on the content.

It's funny how differently people percieve things, like the PP who doesn't feel Jurassic Park is overly violent, whereas I wouldn't describe it as 'non-violent', what with the bloke who gets eaten off the toilet by the T-Rex and the scene with the severed arm etc it's a bit gruesome. Having said that, I can't wait to watch it with DD as I think it's a brilliant film, just not sure how she would react. She has sleep issues so I don't want her getting nightmares - I just hold off until I'm sure she'll be alright with it.

It totally depends on your child and their personality - you know her best, not the other mums at school. You absolutely don't need to be letting her watch things you aren't really comfortable with just because other parents do, trust your own instincts. My DD is sensitive and has anxiety and I've had to be careful what I let her watch, finds sad moments in films unbearable (so no ET or similar). Pretty much no age 12 films until she was nearly 12, and I don't just let her watch any 12 film even now. I watched Mean Girls myself last week to make my mind up if she could watch it, and no, she won't be watching it, way too bitchy. But other 12s she's watched this week, Miss Congeniality and The Devil Wears Prada, were okay. The Deathly Hallows has some grim moments but she's alright with that, but if I sat her down to watch Jaws she'd have nightmares. When you consider how many movies there actually are there is plenty to watch, no rush, they'll get round to older films when they're ready.

Be proud your the only mum who says no. I wear that badge with pride when I get the .. everyone else does/watches ABC

Depends on the film

I’ve let my 6 and 8 year old watch things like the Meg, Jurassic park, and the marvel films.

None of them are overly violent, sweary or sexual.

Something else that contains the above I would let them watch

I've taken my kids to see 12A films at the cinema when they were 3! They were the type of films that I knew they would be OK with like Star Wars (that was only a 12 because one of them got his top off!). If I'm not sure, DH and I will watch it first. We were going to let the kids watch Avengers Infinity War, until the end and Spiderman got turned to dust. That would have scarred them for life!

Bambi is a U is it not? Its the most traumatic film I've ever bloody seen.

Isn't 9/10 the target age for books like Harry Potter and His Dark Materials?

The good thing about watching stuff with them at home, is you can always turn it off if they get upset by it.

Seconding the recommendation to use Common Sense Media. You can see why a film has a particular rating. We're on the relaxed side regarding swearing for example, but the 10yo can get scared by supernatural/ghost type things. So yes, my DC watch some films at an earlier age, but it's not a blanket yes

My 9 year old gets scared at most films so no.

I think 9 is old enough to watch Harry Potter.

Yes I did.

We allowed the kids to watch 12s if they wanted to. They were sensible kids, still are now they are late teens.

Would add that we told them we were prepared to be the "that parent" excuse ANY TIME THEY WANTED... so when Dd15s friends wanted to watch Saw movies she said "mum says no" , and texted us to be forewarned. Same with drinking in the park, etc. She gradually took ownership of her own feelings to do with things, but when things are sprung on them it is easy to say "mum says no".

Remember that ratings are arbitrary and don't really reflect the intended audience. Harry Potter is for primary aged kids. Hunger Games maybe early secondary. But it is good idea that they read books before films.

We do, but my DC2 is less scared of things in films than her older sibling, so it’s a judgement call. There’s 12s and 12s, though - we only let them watch things we’ve seen already at that age, and if something feels not right yet then that’s fine and they accept it. We are on the laxer end of the spectrum (my DH especially!) compared to classmates I think.

9yo is pretty young for a lot of 12s.

My mum used to say 'if you do everything now what will you have to look forward to?' It used to annoy me a lot and now I say the same .

12-rated films are for secondary school kids IMO.

www.commonsensemedia.org/movie-reviews/harry-potter-and-the-goblet-of-fire

Ok Harry Potter 4 has quite a graphic bit at the end of the tournament where someone (trying not to give spoilers) cuts his hand off and cuts Harry’s arm with a knife. There’s blood on his arm and knife. My dd age 12 still can’t look at this part of the film but could have coped with most of the rest a bit earlier. I’d have a cushion on hand for that bit. And the mer-people are pretty creepy and most of the underwater lake task...

Mine aren't at that age yet, so I can only speak for my own experience...
I had no bother watching 12s from about 10 years old. But the jump to 15s and then 18s was harder. I did end up seeing some stuff I wasn't ready for.

I read the first His Dark Materials book when I was a nervous 8 year old, without any issues, and the book is far more graphic and scary than the TV show which cuts out the majority of the worst imagery.