To want a houseplants that just bloody lives

And some more.

Get an app called Planta, honestly it's fab. It does all the hard work for you. Half of my plants have had new growth since I've been using it, amazing since it's winter.

Here are some of my crochet ones.

When the window fitters came just before Christmas, I kept moving it away from wherever they were working and it ended up on top of a cupboard in the bathroom. It seems really happy there, is shooting out new leaves and looks all glossy and shiny.

I've decided it can stay there, rather than go in the bin.

The best tips I can give are:

Find out where the plant lives in its natural habitat in the wild, and try to replicate that environment as much as possible. Alternatively, work out what growing conditions you can offer, and choose a plant that can cope with it.

Get into the habit of picking the plant up and feeling how heavy it is. Then you will be able to tell whether it needs watering or not, just by feel.

Never let the pot stand in water for any length of time. Roots need air as well as water, and waterlogged roots will just rot.

Watering to a regular regime doesn't work. Their requirements will vary depending on the season and the ambient temperature. I water the pelargonium on my west-facing kitchen windowsill once or twice a day in hot sunshine, and at the moment it is overwintering in an east-facing cool spot, and I haven't watered it for at least three weeks. Last week I watered my aloe vera for the first time in about 6 months.

Don't feed a sick/struggling plant thinking it will perk it up. It won't, in fact feeding at that time is more likely to kill it, not less.

House plants and radiators do not mix. Nor do they appreciate draughts.

Well at least crochet plants are guaranteed not to snuff it! Sounds like a very good idea ☺️

I had an emergency speed run to Wilkos last night for pots, and I can tell you that they have POTS at super cheap prices. I got a pretty gold shiny pot for £4 that makes my sad spider plant look quite glam, and a small pinky purple gradient pot for the baby tradescantia that I'm propagating for... £2? maybe £3. And I got some super cute teeny tiny thimble sized pots that I'm going to use for crochet plants (that's another thing I've got addicted to recently, making tiny crochet plants. I have made a couple of (5) crochet monsteras, a crochet pilea and a crochet spider plant, ooh and a snake plant.)

@SBAM and @NotJosieGrosieAnymore yes that's my small Boston fern and I have a bigger one too which I've photographed.

To be honest, I'm not sure what I'm doing right with them, I've only bought them from decent places so that helps and also I spray them every few days which I think they love

No problem, fingers crossed they thrive for you!

*light

I see! Thank you! It’s tricky as our house is east-west facing so we don’t have a south facing windowsill to put them on.

I’ve put them in the conservatory which has more all-round log and will forget about them for a while.

(My 6yo DS has lithops but they need to live in the kitchen as his bedroom is north-facing)

@NotJosieGrosieAnymore they need more sun! That's why they've grown elongated, they're not supposed to do that

Stop watering for now and move to s sunnier place if you can and they may well make a comeback

I’m worried about the wrinkly bits but they look generally ok right?!

Thanks everyone, I shall get on Google now and do some Lithops research. Got them for someone else (very plant savvy) as a Christmas present but they arrived looking completely cruddy so decided to keep them. Prepared to do whatever it takes to avoid another Calathea scenario!

I have a strange obsession with Venus flytraps it's the only plant that seems to survive in my house

@NotJosieGrosieAnymore step away from the lithops! They have a super precise watering schedule and need zero watering over winter, give it a google

Oh god, I can't bear indoor plants. Pots of mud in the house? No thanks!

[quote NotJosieGrosieAnymore]@WinoLino that is a beautiful display!

Is the one in the brown pot a fern? I think I need to go up a few experience levels before I can attempt ferns.

Does anyone have experience of Lithops/living stones? Got some from Amazon so may not have been great specimens to start with, but now they seem to be precariously treading the fine line between life and death....not quite there yet but I’m scared one more watering will finish them off. I do love them though.[/quote]
Lithops do look dead, then bounce back, they need a dormant season where you don't water at all.

Darn, bold fails... but the advice still stands

Are you over-watering or under-watering? Very little will survive on top of a shelf in a room with a north-facing window as its so little light, 'low light' tend to need more than you think... but plants are super lovely once you've cracked them

Anyway, my recommendations based on my personal Plant Habit are...

Low light, if you underwater: ZZ Raven, Snake Plants
Moderate Light, if you underwater: Pothos (Devil's Ivy), ZZ, any Tradescantia, Snake Plants
High Light, if you underwater: Monstera Deliciosa, Snake Plants, Neon Pothos

Low light, if you overwater: Peace Lily (Maybe), Calatheas, but they also need humidity
Moderate light, if you overwater: Peace Lily, Boston Fern (also likes humidity and needs more light that you'd think)
High Light, if you overwater: Nothing, step away

Basically, if your problem, is overwatering, just step away

If it's underwatering, set reminders in your phone or similar.

If it's your north-facing room and a light issue, remember that low light doesn't mean no light! I can only have them right next to my window in my north-facing living room, anywhere else and even the hardy tradescantias start looking dodgy

I'm good with anything that thrives on neglect, my house is full of spider plants and a succulent called Burro's tail. Anything that needs to be cosetted, misted or watered regularly dies.

My Orchid loves being neglected, it flowers continuously, and is massive now, it lives on the soith facing kitchen windowsill. Along with a cactus one of the DC bought at a fete years ago.

We need to find a cactus expert because we don't know what to do with it anymore. its monstrous keeps sprouting more and more arms, is now 2 foot tall and and with all the extra arms 2 an half foot wide. but the arms are so long and heavy they are dropped downwards.