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Original poster

Would you confess your cake had made the hole? Please be honest!

209 replies

CakeHoleinRoof · 04/04/2020 19:19

Name changed for this as It's extremely outing! because It's bizarre, mainly Pom bears, Mexican House Thief, Penis Beaker etc.

So I currently live with my ex partner. This is recent-I moved back in with him to save money in order to buy a house (obviously I can't do that for now Sad ).

We get on okay, but he was a terrible partner when I was with him.
Heavy drink problem (which he managed to keep secret for far too long!), lies, unable to manage finances, a whole barrage of dishonesty about his circumstances. It was horrible, so many tears and sleepless nights on my part as I'd really thought he was for me before then, but it was years ago and I have grown up a lot now.

This definitely bears some relevance to how I treat him now though. I don't have much respect for him admittedly as it took me a long time to rebuild my life when we broke up some years ago. I'm not horrible to him or anything but I am not overly nice. Had I done this to anyone else I'd have been mortified, ad definitely confessed and paid for damages.

We both own the house together.

Some time ago I was baking a cake. I didn't realise the flour had gone off, so the cake was inedible. I decided to chuck it out for the birds.

Amongst other twatty things my ex had done, he built a HUGE outhouse/outbuilding in the garden. I'd previously had the garden lovely albeit small and he built this thing which takes up about 90% of the garden. It's massive. I decided to chuck the cake on top of it.

But it broke the (corrugated plastic) roof of the structure. It made a hole in it.

This was a month or so ago and he has only just noticed. He came into my room this morning holding a hammer and said 'Whose is this hammer?!' I said I don't know, not mine? And he said he thought someone had thrown it into the garden and this is what has broken the roof. He wants to report it to the police as well.

He is not overly upset about it, and has fixed the hole now.

I kind of want to confess because I don't want him wasting police time.

I kind of don't though.

Would you? Honestly?

YANBU -Don't confess, no point and he's a knobhead anyway
YABU-Confess, It's the correct thing to do.

OP posts:
Rogue1001MNer · 28/08/2022 09:03

Aw! Great update.

I'm glad this thread got resurrected.

You're the new carpet fitter

Novum · 28/08/2022 08:58

oakleaffy · 28/08/2022 07:08

No way would a cake make a circle in corrogated plastic roofing unless the plastic was decades old.

Am skeptical, flour just isn’t heavy enough, either.
Especially not a mere “Victoria sponge”.
A hammer in garden?
If the hammer had made the hole, itvwould br inside the “ structure “

Sorry, not buying it!

OP didn't say it made a circle, and she did say the hammer was inside the structure.

Somethingneedstochange · 28/08/2022 08:56

Haha this is hilarious love the comments. 😂😂😂No don't confess he's a nob. What's to report? He's fixed the dam hole. How big is the out building? Just mention you need planning permission for anything bigger than a shed and he might be made to remove it.

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 08:48

I have to go our now but for context, this is what the garden looked like BEFORE I sorted it out (when I first got with him) and yes I know, should have ran a mile. :)

Would you confess your cake had made the hole? Please be honest!
OP posts:
MrsRobinsonsHandprints · 28/08/2022 08:41

My old room is rented out to my most recent ex.

Which old room? Not hammer ex?

Ex ex ruined your lovely garden, he deserved more than a hole in the roof

Mumspair1 · 28/08/2022 08:32

Gosh sorry, I didn't realise it was a zombie thread. But its still as funny 2 years later. Grin

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 08:32

Luredbyapomegranate · 28/08/2022 08:27

No! Why would you. Keep Quiet.

Congratutions on the killer cake. My dad claimed his mum’s rock-buns once broke a window when his little brother threw one. I never believed him. Until now. 🎂💪

I haven't managed to bake anything with gone-off flour since. Grin

I can believe that! My mum used to bake wholemeal scones for 'health reasons'. My dad used to use them to clean out his flask after he'd been staying away for a week and all the tea had congealed inside them Grin I used to joke she should sell them to the council for speedbumps.

OP posts:
Chezandme123 · 28/08/2022 08:31

Sorry but you take the cake! Of course it’s not your fault it’s your ex that needs help mane he should live in his monster shed. And you could bake more cakes to feed him on, yes that sounds daft but his behaviour is daft. The cake is still on the shed roof I doubt it it’s probably fallen to pieces with the rain.

Luredbyapomegranate · 28/08/2022 08:29

Ha. I didn’t realise this was ZOMBIE.

I have just texted my uncle about Killer rock cakes though, so worth it for me.

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 28/08/2022 08:29

You probably should confess but in your shoes I wouldn’t confess.

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 08:27

oakleaffy · 28/08/2022 08:07

@CakeHoleinRoof
I fulsomely apologise for doubting you!
That roof does look quite flimsy.

Thanks for the photo🙂
Glad you got your own place in the end.

Thank you. :) I'm not normally very bothered about things strangers think of me, but I really get flustered at being told I'm lying when I 100% know I'm not! :)

I'll happily post a photo of the loo after he 'missed' too if you like/if people don't believe that either Grin I'd probably get banned from mn

Thank-you, I only expected to be living there a month or so but pandemic. I'm the least house proud person you'll meet but honestly he was difficult to live with mess-wise. So glad I'm out of that!

@nettie434 we're still friendly with one another, I might suggest it 😉

Thank you, it was a tiny garden but I really did try to make it look nice. I enjoyed it for a time at least! :)

OP posts:
Luredbyapomegranate · 28/08/2022 08:27

No! Why would you. Keep Quiet.

Congratutions on the killer cake. My dad claimed his mum’s rock-buns once broke a window when his little brother threw one. I never believed him. Until now. 🎂💪

Belle999 · 28/08/2022 08:22

Technically it's partly your shed too and it's definitely his fault for putting such a shit roof on it

Hawdyerwheesht · 28/08/2022 08:22

He came in to your room with a hammer?! Is he allowed in your room? Deny deny deny.

nettie434 · 28/08/2022 08:18

Oh I'm glad this thread was resurrected and you posted an update @CakeHoleInRoof. I've just voted YANBU because I voted first and then read the rest of the thread. I'm so pleased you took the original advice. That building is a monstrosity and your original garden was lovely. I'm also really pleased things have worked out for you. I wonder if the ex in your old room will end up throwing something at the roof too. He will feel really paranoid if she does.

oakleaffy · 28/08/2022 08:07

@CakeHoleinRoof
I fulsomely apologise for doubting you!
That roof does look quite flimsy.

Thanks for the photo🙂
Glad you got your own place in the end.

RightOnTheEdge · 28/08/2022 08:03

I'm really happy to hear your update OP.
I'm glad you got your own place and a happy ending Smile

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 07:50

I cannot believe I'm doing this but here's a photo. I took this at the time to send to a friend when I was extremely annoyed upon discovering the 'workshop' built atop of the garden I'd lovingly cultivated. The other photo is when I was in the middle of sorting the garden out. I also had flowers and a little lawn at the back. Wasn't happy. But I'm away from there now. :)
@Mumspair1 this is a zombie but it keeps being resurrected and I don't like not responding to people :)

Would you confess your cake had made the hole? Please be honest!
Would you confess your cake had made the hole? Please be honest!
OP posts:
Mumspair1 · 28/08/2022 07:37

This is hilarious. I don't know how you managed to keep a straight face. Definitely don't confess. I doubt the police will come around. Sorry, but if they did it would be even funnier looking at the hammer evidence 🤣

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 07:34

@PupInAPram it really isn't! But I'd not have been able to prove it at the time, let alone now.

OP posts:
PupInAPram · 28/08/2022 07:20

CakeHoleinRoof · 04/04/2020 19:49

Twiggy yes! There's no other room in the garden now Sad tiny bit of pathway down the side, so it was there or nowhere.

Dame I don't know what that is, maybe?!

I scuttled outside and retrieved it (by standing on a wheely bin) once I realised what I'd done. I wasn't for leaving evidence lying about.

Gara I am really glad this is making people laugh. I was worried it would seem made up, I know I can't prove it, but I promise It's 100% truth! lol

"I was worried it would seem made up" 🤔 It's made up, but you really don't need to let it worry you. Plenty of folk enjoy the made up story arc.

Original poster
CakeHoleinRoof · 28/08/2022 07:11

@oakleaffy it wasn't old-I can't remember the exact timelines of when it was built through to 'cakegate' though.

The hammer was inside the structure. As I said before though, he must have just forgotten he'd put it there and come up with that as what must have caused it. Now this thread is so old, I'll see if I can find a photo and alter it or such. Not 'proof' but to deem it more feasible I guess!
You don't have to 'buy' it of course :)

@NewNormalLife it is quite amusing for me that people are still responding-glad it helped!

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 28/08/2022 07:08

No way would a cake make a circle in corrogated plastic roofing unless the plastic was decades old.

Am skeptical, flour just isn’t heavy enough, either.
Especially not a mere “Victoria sponge”.
A hammer in garden?
If the hammer had made the hole, itvwould br inside the “ structure “

Sorry, not buying it!

Fraaahnces · 28/08/2022 06:33

Fuck me, that sounds like my cooking!

NewNormalLife · 28/08/2022 05:43

I know this is a zombie thread but I'm lying awake trying to get to sleep and fretting about an event I've got planned tomorrow and it's given me a good laugh reading the original post and initial responses. Thanks OP.