To think the use of prostitutes just isn't that big a deal?

@ladyGnome
This is a good point but the problem is are we now to legislate how the money is spent?
If she had saved the money and become wealthy would it be ok?
I am not saying one way or another it is very complicated.

Storm11111, you insult everyone on here by saying, "Now you're considering it, right?" in that pervy way.

No, we're not. I understand that to certain people, every woman is a prostitute who would as a matter of course do anything if the price were high enough. You might be: I'm not. I can't speak for anyone else but I bet I'm not alone.

What a nasty mindset.

I think that in theory I don’t have a problem with prostitution. I don’t buy into there being a problem with a body being a commodity. It’s no different than selling my brain to my employer. And I don’t believe that payment necessarily equals coercion.

That being said, in the real world prostitution comes with a whole host of issues that have been more than covered by everyone else. It would be impossible to ensure that prostitution is always a genuine choice, and that those who chose to do it were safe. Without those guarantees it can’t be acceptable.

Hi @Hihothedairyo
I just wanted to say I am very sorry to hear what you have been through in your life. I hope you have the support you need to try and recover from this.
I think it has taken courage to start a thread like this especially looking at some of the replies you have received.
This thread has been informative.

I feel sorry for the partner of your friend, what a bloody dishonest person he is and not deserving of a girlfriend. I would stop being friends with a man if he admitted this, what redeeming qualities does this friend have? He is good at making himself out to be a nice guy isn’t he, which quite frankly he isn’t.

I got out relatively unscathed compared to other
women I knew, but it absolutely breaks my heart to think of my daughter ever being in that position.

And all your daughters too.

Women and girls deserve better than prostitution. All of them. Even the addicted ones, the abused ones, the ones who feel worthless. Even the ones who are ‘happy’ with their ‘choice’.

Nordic model now.

No man has a right to buy sexual services from a woman, not one.

Or could it be seen as a woman having the right to sell her body?

There are lots of jobs in society people wouldn't do if given a free choice. This doesn't make it acceptable, but it is a fact of living in an unequal society. I hated my job in a care home (nothing wrong with being a carer, it was just an awful home with a nasty manager), I didn't purposefully choose it, but it was better than the alternatives of unemployment or an even worse paid 0 hour contract cleaning job. This is what some sex workers say they feel about their industry: not necessarily what they wanted for themselves in life, but better (and better paid) than the alternatives available to them.

I wouldn't want to socialise with anyone that had seen a sex worker. It's an unregulated industry rife with abuse. But some women do chose sex work, as uncomfortable as that may be, and I respect their autonomy. I think steps should be made to make their job safer - this is what sex worker's groups are asking for.

Watch the latest Louis Theroux program about women who sell sex and tell me if you think these women were happy, contented individuals with strong mental health. I have yet to see a prostitute interviewed on tv or in magazines who didn’t have poor mental health and came from an unhappy childhood. Most of these women are broken, are doing this because they need the money and the men who use them don’t give a flying fuck that these women are deep down desperate and unhappy.

The women he meets have a far better wage than I do

Yet I'm guessing you wouldn't want to swap with them right? Why's that?

I’m not a SWERF, but I am a PPERF (Pimp and Punter exclusive). Pro ‘sex work’ people often cannot tell the difference, but that’s because they don’t know what I know.

Think about someone you find totally repulsive.

I will give you £100 to sleep with him. No?
How about a million?
Still no? how about 50 million? Now you're considering it right?

Still really don't want to sleep with him do you?

You know the experience is going to be traumatic but you really want that 50 million.

Just because some women's price point where they are willing to abuse themselves in the interest of a man is at different levels does not make it any less morally wrong.

One woman's 50 million can be another woman's £20. I'd argue that the £20 woman is likely to be much more desperate and vulnerable.

'not try to shame women for their career choice'

Who has done that

The thread is about men who pay for sex. Who are getting lambasted and rightly so

I think buying a woman's body is a foul idea and I'm firmly in favour of the Nordic Model. No man has a right to buy sexual services from a woman, not one.

I had a furious online argument on FB with some Liberal Feminist friends who really had swallowed the 'happy hooker' myth hook, line and sinker. I even got called a SWERF which is bloody ridiculous as I'm a bloke so I can't even be a feminist, let alone a radical one.

Strippers who work in a club and don't do private dances, are dancing in full view of many people - they are not alone with men and they don't have to have anything inserted into their body.

This is how it starts though. Once you are in that world it becomes your new normal. The other girls, who you like and respect, all make more than you because they do private dances and so the club managers direct customers to them and not you. Eventually you give a private dance a go because rent is due tomorrow and you are the only girl on shift that has made less than xx this week. It’s not that bad so you do another one. The management start sending regular, big spending customers your way but these are the men that expect you to do ‘extras’ - maybe one or two of them you might have slept with for free in the real world, if you were drunk enough, lonely enough...

It chips away at you. You take a job as a dancer, you end up with a cock in your hand and a fistful if tenners in your handbag.

Peak earning years are 18-22 (younger if you have fake ID), not exactly our wisest years!

winesalot I am indeed in the UK.
And not representative as the majority worldwide ...no. But there are certainly a significant amount of women who are in that camp. And Charlotte Rose in particular was very indignant recently as she was cut from a documentary about prostitution.. she feels it was because she was too positive about her career choice. I've also interviewed a former street worker who would sell her body for 6 so she could buy crack. It was heartbreaking and she is now clean and helps other street workers. There are a whole range of workers within the sex industry and I think it's important to recognise that and help those that desperately need it and not try to shame women for their career choices if they enjoy it and claim they have no self worth etc... it's ignorant

I made an absolute fucking fortune. Problem was, it was all cash, and I was living a life that looked to the outside eye, very glamorous, going to all these fancy-fuck hotels (Ritz/Dorchester etc) and so you need a fancy bag and fancy shoes and your hair done and a gram of cocaine just to keep chipper around these men who you can’t really fucking stand, and you need a taxi there and back and a baby sitter and you know your mate needs to pay her traffickers on Friday and she hasn’t got the cash and so you give her half of yours and now you don’t have quite enough left to pay rent that month so the cycle starts over.

You can’t prostitute to buy a house because you can’t account for where the money is coming from. Conveyancers are on the look out for signs of money laundering so a relatively young woman with a giant cash deposit and no paper trail for it is going to get reported to the police.
Even those who make tons of money are stuck in an unstable life.
Besides, we all get old, and youth is the thing that punters prize the most, so once you are of a certain age you are either a niche attraction and expected to do niche things (often very risky) or you start making money out of introducing younger women and it becomes a pyramid scheme of exploitation.

Some of the men in the racket are also vulnerable, doormen/barmen/cleaners etc are all just as likely trafficked as the women, and equally likely to be introduced to a drug habit that gets them into unpayable debts to the higher ups.

It’s worse for the women, but it’s not rosy for the men at the bottom either. Like I said before, it’s not an ‘industry’, it’s organised crime.

Also what about stripping? Some of the responses here would bring that into the equation?
How does that equate if we are going down this line?

It can't come as a shock that many people who don't agree with the commodification of women's bodies are consistent across the piece? So no to prostitution, no to stripping, no to surrogacy.

Any more whataboutery anyone else wants to throw in as if it were some kind of 'gotcha'?

Freddie So, do you believe that they are representative of the majority of prostitutes then?

And are you in the UK?

Thanks for answering?

No problem with it at all.

I believe in free will and certainly not everyone who is selling sexual activity is doing it because they have no other option. What about sugar babies? What about straight up goldiggers? Are they innocents with no other choice? A lot of women choose to sell themselves in different capacities.
I also know a guy who has visited prostitutes. Just a normal busy guy with no girlfriend and high standards. The women he meets have a far better wage than I do.

winesalot no two different escorts. I have interviewed them but I've also subsequently spent time with them socially. They are happy.

The question always remains 'how do you really know that the person you are paying to penetrate their body or to provide any sexual service to you is doing this completely of their own free choices'?

freddiemercury So, she got to pick and choose her clients then? Was she the person that said 'If I was good at flower arranging, I'd be a florist'? I only ask these things because you do seem to be making your point based on 'interview' knowledge and you really cannot know what is truly happening within that person.

However, I will agree that there is always going to be people who will choose this work completely willingly without having any issues or need to 'disassociate'. They also may be the ones who have a choice in which men they have sex with.