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Original poster

Male privilege: How can I explain to a man why some women are afraid of men?

229 replies

IvyBush123 · 20/01/2020 19:48

A make friend of mine talked about male privilege a few months ago or I was trying to explain it to him - but I don’t think he got what I was trying to say.
He was walking down the street in the evening, it was getting dark and there was nobody else in the street but a unaccompanied women who hurried and gave him fearful looks.
My friend is a harmless person, very nice, would never do anything bad to a woman. He was hurt by the fact she seemed to fear him.

I tried to explain to him that most men aren’t rapist but some are and women like to be on the safe side. Don’t think he got what I was trying to say.

OP posts:
Howzaboutye · 20/01/2020 20:11

He could change his personal hurt into outrage that other men do such awful things that women genuinely fear an unknown man.

formerbabe · 20/01/2020 20:11

Tell him to imagine being in a prison with no guards and 1000 men. All the men are bigger and stronger than him. They are all friendly and safe to be around except one who wants to rape and kill him.

Ask him if he'd be on his guard or totally relaxed?

BaolFan · 20/01/2020 20:07

You don't have to.

You tell him that women rely on their learned experience - that some men are dangerous and that there is no way to tell which ones are and which aren't. So your own self-preservation instincts tell you that if you are in a vulnerable position - such as a quiet street after dark with nobody else around - then the most sensible thing to do is put your keys between your fingers and walk/run as fast as you can to somewhere busy and brightly lit.

Tell him that if he finds this troubling then he should become an ally and support women and girls. And part of that support is that sometimes women and girls are going to find him intimidating and a threat simply because he is male and they are all too aware that they are not as strong or fast.

Original poster
IvyBush123 · 20/01/2020 19:52

How can I explain to him it is not about him and not meant to be an offense. He is a big man with a buzz cut and lots of muscles, very nice but looks a bit rough. How can I explain he looks far more dangerous than he is?

OP posts: