To feel bullied into letting my children swell the coffers of a charity I do not wish to contribute to?

Apologies as I haven't read the full thread but clapping to Hercules for saying "write a letter explaining that you will be donating to a missing childrens charity instead. "

That's exactly what I don't understand of this problem. People have cancer and ask to donate to Cancer Research, Lymphoma? to the Lymphoma Society, peanut allergy? to the Anaphilaxis campaing but a girl of an afluent family get lost and... they set a special fund.

Gosh, I would like to set a fund to ensure DS received the apropiate medical attention pertinent for his health problems which are, incidentally, life threatening, but I think it would be somewhat selfish on my part to overlook the fact that there are plenty of parents on the same boat and that we can do more as a group than as individuals.

I'd leave it up to your DCs to choose if they want to spend their pocket money on such a thing (if they're old enough) BUT I'd aldo be writing to the school Head to complain. As for the other mums, I'd point out calmly that fundraising for Madeline McCann is pointless, she's almost certaily dead and there are many more worthy causes.

YANBU.

I too believe in people charities before animal charities.

And prefer to support small local charities, rather than big charities. And I too object to the RSPCA.

Once I worked in an office where there was a particularly difficult woman. When she left, I was the one who took the envelope round to invite every one to contribute to her leaving present. I had a lot of respect for the guy who said "No thank you. I do not like the lady."

I have a moral objection to the RSPCA too, based on their priorities and practices and I have refused to give to them.
YANBU, at all

You are not being unreasonable at all - you should never feel pressurised to give money to any charity unless you wish to. Perhaps you could encourage your children(sorry didnt see their ages) to participate by helping on a stall if they wish or alternatively spend their own pocket money as has been suggested.

I'm an animals over people person charity wise BTW

Having said that I do a bit of both.

It wasn't even a Book Of Condolences.
It was a Ring-binder of Condolences.

I know because my sister stood in the same 4 hour queue in the same rain. She did it to accompany her gay flatmate who said he couldn't face it alone.

YANBU fmv, I'd feel the same. Your sister sounds a card though !
I'm a people before pussies giver too aqlthough I resist the temptation to debate my views with the various "Help a tiny wolverine in distress" collectors on my travels...

Agree with you, Filthymindedvixen. Sorry for Maddy, but fail to see why her case is more important than other people's missing children. We don't even know for sure that she is still alive. Would rather give to Amnesty International.

Nobody should be criticised for not given to a certain charity. They might be giving to another one.

I thought I was on my own re animal charities! People before pussies is our family motto.

FMV,it is a tricky situation.I agree with your POV entirely.Will your boys suffer fallout from not taking part?Would they be asvble to just get away with taking 50p or so & buy some sweets?

Never understood that either, margo.

YANBU. Doesn't the fund already have millions of pounds in it? And that's made no difference so far, so how will a bunch of school children putting their pennies in help?

I've been here a long time, moondog, and this move was dead easy because it didn't involve learning or speaking another language.

This TV programme is really pissing me off.

What do your kids think (how old are they?)?

Do they want to raise money for this? Is it important to them?

If so, givem the cash. If not don't.

YANBU but I wouldn't stress about it. I am always being asked to sponsor people in aid of XYZ and though I wouldn't necessarily have chosen XYZ charity, it doesn't bother me to sponsor.

I understand the point about other, starving children but I feel that about animal charities ...don't understand why people want to give money to cats' homes and donkey sanctuaries when children are starving and dying. BUT...other people seem to find that position odd and I think the RSPCA is Britain's most popular charity so I seem to be on my own on that one.

Yes, your basic point is right. But it's actually easier (and in some ways nicer) just to show solidarity even if you know it won't achieve anything.

lol
Thought it was a new fangled British expression you hadn't yet got.

Very impressed with your Scottish slang though.I bet you don't go around the place braying about your fannypack eh?

Sorry, I've got one eye on 'No Place like Home'.

ground expat.

I'd stand my crowd and not give a bean.

Sorry, but I can think of more worthwhile causes.

My sister once mixed up the jobs of dishwasher and diver (same word in French) when first in France with her (French) dh.
She spent the evening gushing to the mystified bottlewasher about how daring and exciting and unpredictable his job must be and had he trained very hard for it???

lol at socialist/social worker mix up