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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect my 8 year old DS to not eat with his hands anymore?

82 replies

LittleBoot · 04/07/2007 10:09

I screamed and shouted and ranted at him this morning.

Honestly, I have tried everything. Star charts for eating nicely. Ignoring it when he uses his hands as maybe it's a way of winding me up. Praising his sister (5) for using her cutlery and ignoring that he isn't using his. Ranting. Joking. Disappointment. Threats. Promises. Rewards. Sanctions.

Nothing has worked, what am I doing wrong? How do I get him to use his cutlery as a default?

OP posts:
barney2 · 04/07/2007 11:50

If he's a fussy eater and he eats despite using his hands I wouldn't worry about it. Atleast he eats!! I think it is an attention seeking thing - kids can be clever and if they know its winding up the parents they'll do it all the more!

Original poster
LittleBoot · 04/07/2007 11:43

It is reassuring to know he's not the only savage untamed 8 year old around

Maybe I can do that deal with him - I will not hassle you at home if you eat properly outside and when we have guests.

But my thinking has been that if he's used to doing it at home, he won't have to think about it when out and about so will be more comfortable.

OP posts:
Original poster
LittleBoot · 04/07/2007 11:14

Hmm, that's one way SD I suppose I could starve him.

He's already quite thin though and fussier about food than DD.

OP posts:
SweetyDarling · 04/07/2007 10:34

I would have been told to leave the table without my dinner. Harsh, but my table manners were pretty impecable.

venusinfurs · 04/07/2007 10:27

Oh Littleboot, we thought it was only our eight year old DS! His table manners are awful and we can't work out how it has happened. We have a plan at the moment to concentrate on one thing at a time, so we're starting with the hands business and then moving onto the getting up/pushing chair back/stuffing food in gob.
I can only sympathise.

Enid · 04/07/2007 10:24

I have said to dd1 (7) that as long as she uses a knife and fork beautifully in front of grandma/other peoples parents, I dont care mucha bout her using one at home

she doenst use hansd though - a spoon or fork only usually

duchesse · 04/07/2007 10:23

Two of my 3 still do this. They are cough14 and cough 10cough cough.

Apparently they have beautiful table manners at other people's houses (has been commented on many times, and not by eople who live in zoos either).

I reckon it is part laziness and part winding me up. Have NO IDEA how to deal with as have been trying same things fruitlessly for 13 years now. That's a definition of madness, isn't it?

If you do find out, please tell me...