DTs came home from PILs today with NAIL VARNISH on...

I think you are perfectly entitled to be annoyed if you don't like this kind of thing.
They are your children, so what you say goes.
Tell your FIL and I'm sure it won't happen again.

But I think the scale of your reaction is unreasonable.
You're furious about it?
Really?
Furious?

Sheesh, they're only three - if you're furious about nail varnish now, I predict there are going to be an awful lot of things for you to get fury-filled about in the future!!

You'll be exhausted!

So you wouldn't have minded if the 5yr old had done it?

My youngest (3yrs old nearly 4yrs) loves her nail varnish but she only has a clear/tinted one with glitter in it. I think if it's just dress up then that is OK for me. I wouldn't judge anybody else on what they do with regards to nail varnish...what a waste of time and emotion. I know you are only talking about what is acceptable to you but surely a one-off isn't such a big deal. Make a rule now and make it clear to your family and friends if it worries you that much.

It's not going to alter your children. It's not going to harm them. They had a lovely time with their grandad who will obviously do anything to make them happy. Can you say half jokingly/half seriously next time you leave them with him 'And NO make-up up this time....Grandad!'.

TBH I would have been more annoyed if it had been the 5yo than grandad who had done it. At least grandad would have done it properly, not made loads of mess on fingers and/or nearby surfaces, and possibly risk getting in eyes/mouth. My 5yo is not allowed access to nail polish on her own (she did get hold of it once on her own and I was not happy with the consequences!).

I feel sorry for poor grandad TBH. Really don't think this warrants being furious with him. He was spending time with his grandchildren and having a bit of fun - doing something that, let's face it, many people do seem as being fine. I think grandad sounds lovely.

But if you do object, which you are in your rights to do with your own children, then tell grandad not to do it in future.

inamuckingfuddle - I'm with you on this one. I think though that whilst I don't like the look of it my actual gripe is probably the same as yours in that they're too young IMO. There is plenty of time for them to do all this as they get older at which point I will be happy to indulge them with age specific products (i.e. Barbie polish rather than grown up stuff).

I don't share your opinions of the propriety of their grandad doing it though. It sounds like the three of them had fun together and I envy the fact that your kids have that relationship with their GP's as my parents are rubbish with my DDs.

I take it that was a light-hearted post, sofieamies.

Fuddle, I'd be a bit is grandad put nail varnish on 3 year old to ne honest. And I know people who would hate it. I don't think you're in such a small minority.

But you are being unreasonable

oh lol

ds is desperate for nail varnish

"When they are 16 and want to put on nail varnish and makeup and go down the town and pick up boys....then it's time to make a fuss"

I am not sure exactly what you're going to do about that when they are 16...

Wouldn't bother me. I actually think it is quite nice that their 58 year old grandad was involved enough in their visit to actually do their nails. I wish my grandad had done things like that with me. Or any of my family really...

If it really bothers you, could you have a word with them? Or, if you're worried about rocking the boat, just take it off the DTs nails when they get home.

I too think it is absolutely fine. I see nothing wrong with children wearing make up, or nail varnish,as it is a very different thing to the way adults wear it.

Of course I wouldn't allow it for school, but thats more an issue of looking smart than anything else.

I really think you need to learn to pick your battles. When they are 16 and want to put on nail varnish and makeup and go down the town and pick up boys....then it's time to make a fuss. In the meantime it really is a bit of harmless fun. And I think you should be greatful your fil had the sense to put it on them himself. My father took my kids to the park last week and "watched" (he had no idea what was going on) while dd (4) put pink nailpolish on half the kids in the park (fingers and toes) including ds (6). He saw her surrounded by a circle of children and was just thrilled "she had made so many friends." Luckily I had no complaints from the parents!

And by the way, I wear no makeup whatsoever (and never have) and neither does my mother (and never has). I still enjoyed experimenting as a young child whenever I was at a friend's house. My dd has just been given a bunch of makeup from a friend and she has had lots of fun playing with it. Either she will outgrow it, or she won't. But surely there are more important things to worry about in your child's life than her 3 year old experimentations as aided by their grandad. And if you are going to make complaints about bad habits, you seem to have a real penchant for swearing...hopefully you aren't teaching that to your 3 year olds. Much more distasteful than a bit of nail polish in my opinion.

Oh and before I get jumped on - I mean in the dress up / make-up way. And just seeing my ds2's face with my lipstick applied livens and brightens my day tremendously.

Don't come to my house then, my ds's both wear my nailvarnish, lipstick and other makeup. Don't see what's the harm in it. All children should be allowed to experiment with all sorts of things

I agree, too. I don't like to see young girls tarted up, but this falls into the category of 'dressing up'. What a lovely grandad.

Exactly how I feel but better said Daisymoo

morningpaper, that is so sweet! i love that idea, may I pinch it?

IMO little ones wearing nail varnish is no different to them walking around the house in mummys shoes. Just a bit of fun.

Poor grandad!

My four year old hasn't the foggiest idea what nail varnish is, therefore if she came home from anywhere wearing it I would be livid. It's just not necessary.

Agnes

Sometimes I read threads like this and decide that when/if my sons have children I won't offer to look after them because no doubt something I do will be Terribly Wrong and cause Great Consternation and Offence.

I do see why you wouldn't like, however I think in the big scheme of things it is a teeny tiny issue and that your children are really lucky to have a grandfather who wants to spend time with them and make them happy.

ELC do some gentle stuff. I hardly ever use it because the brushes are rubbish.

My DSs (4 and 2) have both worn nail varnish on their toes because they were fascinated seeing me put it on. It came off after a few days. Can't see the harm really if it's a one-off.