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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

that a woman stacking shelves in Iceland would make a point of getting my 3 year old to look at her because she happens to be called Maddy

44 replies

YesShesCalledMadeleine · 25/05/2007 14:03

this is just ridiculous

we were walking past her, she was stocking shelves, she actually stood in our way barring our pat so that she could get a good look at my child who was happily skipping along and calling me mummy

I am finding this wholly intrusive

OP posts:
madamez · 25/05/2007 14:26

Bit of a difference between intervening when you think there's something wrong (crying child being dragged along or shouting I HATE YOU I WANT MY MUMMY - the latter happened to an old work colleague of mine when he refused to buy his DD an expensive doll - he had to show the store manager the family photo in his wallet to demonstrate that he was actually her dad..) and pesetering a perfectly happy child, who looks nothing like a newsworthy missing child anyway but happens to have the same name.
The one is potentially embarssaing but potentially life-saving, the other is just twatty show-off behaviour - "look! Look how much I CARE!"

SugaryBits · 25/05/2007 14:23

I think this is happening a lot. I have seen a few threads on here from people who have had their DD's "inspected" and it happened to a friend of mine.

I think it's a good thing it is in peoples consciousness but it seems it is going a bit too far. The likelihood of the kidnapper/s taking her to a supermarket or park or other very public place in this country is remote and I can understand why you felt it was intrusive.

niceglasses · 25/05/2007 14:23

Wouldn't bother me either. I think the point about Jamie Bulger is pertinent. Lots of ppple saw him being dragged to the railway line and one woman even stopped and asked the 2 boys what they were up to. The Blake Morrison book on the case is outstanding.

No harm done surely?

(she said vainly hoping this didn't turn into another ranty McCann thread)

OrmIrian · 25/05/2007 14:23

A bit mad I agree but well-intentioned.

My mum was stopped in a garden centre the other day by an old woman who told her that she should be really careful no-one stole 'that pretty little boy'. I probably would have smiled and thought she was a nutter. Mum got quite upset and now won't let him out of her sight for a moment.

GameGirly · 25/05/2007 14:20

We've had the same on several occasions, and mine is 9 not 4 FFS. Never mind, at least people are keeping an eye out, I suppose. I can't help feeling they're looking in the wrong country, though.

tinymum · 25/05/2007 14:18

Yes but don't forget, when Jamie Bulger was kidnapped lots of people saw him being taken, and were suspicious, but nobody did anything 'in case they were wrong'.

I'm sure people doing this, although over the top, have good intentions so it wouldn't make me angry, personally.

TenaLady · 25/05/2007 14:16

Well, I wouldnt have a problem with it, only that your child was completely a different colouring and tbh if you kidnapped a child you wouldnt call it by it by name in public surely.

fryalot · 25/05/2007 14:16

when dd1 was little, a shop assistant quizzed her about whether I was really her mum and whether she was ok - I was absolutely livid.

Seriously and I don't blame you in the slightest for being upset.

Rationally, I knew at the time that if she wasn't my daughter, then the shop assistant was doing a very brave and correct thing, but she was my daughter ffs and no jumped up shoe-selling teenager was going to question that.

grr

hercules1 · 25/05/2007 14:15

Well, I think it woulnt .

WK007 · 25/05/2007 14:14

If she was blonde and pale I'd say YABU but as she's dark skinned, thats going a bit over the top - I know maddy has to be found but everyone needs to be sensible!

madamez · 25/05/2007 14:13

I'd have said something nasty to the woman, myself. "leave MY DAUGHTER alone you dozy twat" wopuld have been the least of it. In the hope of kick-starting her addled brain.

Original poster
YesShesCalledMadeleine · 25/05/2007 14:12

I actually think it would get to you if someone stood in your path and started grabbing your child's attention away from you in a shop you have been going in for years. I think it would bother you actually, and possibly rather a lot

OP posts:
hippmummy · 25/05/2007 14:09

It's a bit ridiculous really. You'd hardly go to the trouble of of dying her hair and skin as a disguise and then call her 'Maddy' if you were a kidnapper

charliecat · 25/05/2007 14:05

Better to be safe than sorry. Dont let it get to you.

hercules1 · 25/05/2007 14:04

It wouldnt bother me at all.

TheArmadillo · 25/05/2007 14:04

How bizarre and over the top.

Ridiculous is about the only way to describe it.

Must have been very intrusive.

PinkTulips · 25/05/2007 14:04

wtf?!

i'd be !

tinymum · 25/05/2007 14:04

Well, no harm done I suppose.

Original poster
YesShesCalledMadeleine · 25/05/2007 14:04

my brunette, dark-skinned, dark-eyed child

OP posts:
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