to be really p****d off at sahm neighbour upstairs who is making me want to clobber her!!

so if shes entitled to the benefits she receives wots wrong with that? does she have a dp?

itbird, if you said that postboxes were red and that black cabs were , well, black, someone would take offence and accuse you of 'dissing' postboxes and black cabs as well as being racists, sexist ans franly unpleasant. it's the way of MN

how is she playing the system though? are you saying she is not entitled to the benefits she is getting?

I think your best bet is to get a different interest, rather than spying on and worrying about your neighbours.
If you are out at work all day how do you know she spends all afternoon sunbathing and drinking wine?

Nightmare neighbours are a perfectly okay reason to rant. The state of the neighbours finances/size/garden are neither here nor there.

Agnes

If she is dealing drugs it will be a nightmare. My auntie had this a while back from a neighbour - people coming and going all hours of the day and night. Discuss with the police for advice about that one.

There is a difference between a SAHM (which I am at the moment) and someone who is playing the system - believe me there are plenty of them out there.
Trouble is - if we believe there should be a benefit system to support the genuine people who need it(and I do believe there should be)then we also have to accept that there are always going to be people who will never make any contribution. This lady could be one of those - I don't know her so I don't know her situation. However, she sounds a nightmare of a neighbour.

isn't it illegal to film people without their knowledge?

i think i'd do it though if i could do it subtly.

i sit with ds in the garden and have a glass of wine. doesn't mean i'm lazy and can't be arsed to go to work every day.

can you video camera the dealings going on through window friends of mine did and got the people moved on

Stop being jealous and try to engage the kids into something from the pound shop. Like Drawing or sommat like that. If not, kick hell out of the mother.

Unfortunately, I have no proof. I see lots of lads going to their door, they are spoken to through the window, some things are exchanged and then the lads go.
I just want to move away - they are a nightmare!

Nixz, if you are certain she is dealing drugs then why not report her? I wouldn't want someone who sells drugs living beside me.

I am a SAHM/WAHM and I can't find the time to sit out sunbathing!

Well, imho, she's not much cop as another if she's drinking wine all day and her kids are running wild. Sounds like she is a sahm because she can't be arsed to get up rather than because she wants to bring up her kids and not work.

oh and to the op, is she single? cos in that case there isn't much you can do but be a sahm and claim benefits. i should know. if she has a dp who works it is unlikely that they would actually get many benefits. if both parents stay at home, i hate to say it, but yes it would annoy me cos i don't think there's any need for it. imo if theres 2 parents, both of them don't need to stay at home. either one stays at home, the other works, or you both work part time and do alternating days/shifts if you both feel you need to be at home with your children.

Desdirata -

well in that case report them for benefit fraud. that's wrong and i would also be pissed off that she is claiming benefits she isn't entitled to. as for getting dressed all day neither do me and ds if we aren't going out - saves on washing!

That's cool by me, Nixz. That sounds like a nightmare situation, and I apologize for my earlier post.

Also to point out - i didnt mention anything about the fact that i was paying for her.

I can mention it because, as awful as this sounds (i am by no means a snob and have been in some difficult situations myself) but I live on a council estate where the majority of both parents do not work, instead they sit in their gardens and drink and smoke all day long whilst their children are wearing clothes that I have given them. The lady who lives next door pretends she is a single mum whilst her bloke goes out to work, her children do not get dressed all day, I am certain she is selling drugs and she is extremely rude and agressive - and extremely inconsiderate to my family so i do feel cross at times. I also feel cross that she can sah and sell drugs and fiddle the system whilst i have to go to work and probably have less money in my pocket every week - so yes, i am for real.
Just to point out, i have also been a sahm for two years and if i could have more children, i would definately do it again.

I guess you aren't going to read the rest of this, but I also object to both of you using 'elephant' sahm. This suggests that women who stay at home to look after their kids are lazy, and by dint of your reasoning, also fat.