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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not be particularly pleased when ds comes home from nursery having read a book about all the monsters in Dr Who?

182 replies

FrannyandZooey · 08/05/2007 18:33

Another child brought it in, and he and ds spent the morning looking at it.

I would rather things like this from home were "oohed" over briefly by staff before being put away on a high shelf "to keep it safe until home time".

Ds particularly interested in "The Garlics"

"Mummy why do the Garlics try to kill Dr. Who?"

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Twiglett · 10/05/2007 18:36

Franny my point is that they go to reception at 4.5 - 5 years old and then one starts to come to terms with the external influences that help to shape your child and it can be rather difficult when you have been used to setting all the boundaries, steering them in a particular direction.

I think this is just a small precursor of that feeling

and I think i'm saying its a feeling all of us recognise

edam · 10/05/2007 18:35

Well, I don't like guns, tbh, although I'm having difficulties over that one because weapons do seem to be something that interest almost all small boys. I don't want ds to be left out but I still don't approve of playing with guns. Which makes the superhero stuff tricky... but I wouldn't stop him playing Robin Hood, so am aware I'm not consistent on this one...

Can't think of anything else... give me some examples and I'll let you know!

NotQuiteCockney · 10/05/2007 18:33

Frances, I do think you'd like Sardine. Dungeon is pretty good, too, although quite a bit more violent.

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:33

"Dr Who won't harm him"

In your opinion, no. I have a different opinion.

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FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:32

Do you feel that anything is off limits for toys, then Edam? This is a very interesting subject to me

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Aloha · 10/05/2007 18:31

Look, being influence by peer pressure is hugely important and normal and natural. It is a GOOD thing. Dr Who won't harm him.

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:31

I like the alarm for a crying child!

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edam · 10/05/2007 18:31

Aloha How's ds doing?

I do have some sympathy for Franny's view, don't particularly like merchandising, superheroes and Marvel comic stuff myself. Dr Who is different for the reasons stated - quality drama in the tradition of the Grimm tales. We only let him watch the odd one that is rated as not very scary by their panel of child viewers, including a 4yo. But he does watch Dr Who Confidential as I think seeing behind the scenes helps to limit the scare factor when he does see it, IYKWIM.

DS thank heavens is not really into Spiderman and whatever although he's aware of them as some of his friends are. And I'm sure they will become more prominent in his life soon.

The thing that made me sit up and pay attention was the idea that a nursery would prevent a child from playing with a toy that interested them because it was somehow not a good thing. Seemed wrong to me.

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:30

He isn't out of the house for anything like that Twig

I am not really sure I get your point?

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FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:30

I am not sure either Aloha?

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NotQuiteCockney · 10/05/2007 18:29

(Is he still liking Captain Pirate Underpants?)

Twiglett · 10/05/2007 18:29

I don't think you can encourage or discourage once they are out of the house and mingling with peers for 5 days a week, 7 hours (or more) a day

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:27

I have had very little control over his interests for as long as I can remember

he is intensely curious and stubborn and has always led the way, tbh

we don't have many interests in common, but we muddle along somehow

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NotQuiteCockney · 10/05/2007 18:27

Frances, next time you visit, have a look at Sardine or Dungeon. Both French comic books that I have in translation, both very silly, and lovely and funny. Sardine has lots of runaway kids and an alarm that sounds if a child is crying. The badguy looks like a superhero. All very strange.

Aloha · 10/05/2007 18:27

I'm not sure if you misunderstand me F&X?

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:26

I don't think encouraging an interest in gruesome gory realistic-looking violence rather than pretendy type make believe violence is a good thing

I think Dr Who is too graphic and too realistic

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Twiglett · 10/05/2007 18:25

but he is not oblivious to them any more .. and this, IME, is HOW they get interested in them .. through stuff their friends show them / bring into school / talk about

it is around the age of 4 that influences outside your control really start to have a bearing on the child's interest

and it was at this age that I first felt the huge angst and pain of losing that small amount of control

again just IME

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:24

Ah Twig he loves all that stuff, he does

he loves to play fighting and all that business

but I wasn't expecting him to have his repertoire of gruesome baddies to thwack extended so effectively by nursery

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Aloha · 10/05/2007 18:23

Well, it may not be an advantage to be interested in them, but it doesn't hurt them, and it is definitely an advantage to WANT to be interested in them because their friends are.

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:22

No, I was talking about there not being an advantage to being interested in them at this age

not vice versa

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Twiglett · 10/05/2007 18:22

he's on the turn franny .. it happens ..

Aloha · 10/05/2007 18:20

My ds has Aspergers, is immune to peer pressure and has no interest in superheroes etc. It is really not an advantage. Ds is lovely and clever and rather old-fashioned, and I think its sweet, but it's not really to his advantage.

FrannyandZooey · 10/05/2007 18:17

Pointydog I guess my point is that ds had no interest in these things until introduced to them at nursery. We walk past the comic shop most days but he has never shown any interest in it before - however this week the models of the monsters caught his eye and he wanted to stop and look at them.

I do agree (through gritted teeth) about not crushing boys' enthusiasm for superheroes once the interest has developed - but if they are still oblivious to these things then I don't see an advantage in introducing them.

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pointydog · 10/05/2007 17:04

yES, TIGER. I feel a bit sorry for your son. I don't understand why comics, cartoons, superheroes etc are seen as 'not educational'.

If teachers cannot harness that enthusiasm in some small way in the classroom and use it creatively and educationally, then it's a pretty poor show.

tigermoth · 09/05/2007 21:46

agree with edam, pointydog etc on this. How could I not, having got a son now aged 7 who was heavily into toy soldiers from the age of 4 and before that, into power rangers. He plays well and imaginatively IMO - I don't have major problems with him sharing, learning, communicating etc. But I have met people along the way (mainly 'PC' workers at playclubs) who have tried to steer him towards toys they consider 'better'. It never works and it makes ds feel sad, saps his confidence and confuses him IMO.

I think 4 is a bit of a watershed year, as it is approaching school age with lots more Dr Who, power rangers, superhero influences.

I think it's good to have wholesome, educational toys around but also to realise that they will not replace the less PC and more commercialised toys. And in the end, it's your child who will choose how and what they play with.

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