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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to want DH to get a motorbike?

36 replies

luciemule · 05/05/2007 20:34

My DH loves sports cars/any cars really and until DD was born, had a sports car. However he has now decided he wants to get a motorbike, which he rightly claims would be good for commuting (avoiding queues on a friday night) and would be cheap to buy/insure etc. I'm just worried he'll end up dead! He loves driving fast although does drive safely, especially when me and kids are in the car and doesn't usually go above 90 on his own (so he says). It's not just him though - it's other drivers not seeing him on a bike etc. Am I being daft as so many people have motorbikes? He says it'll be another regret he has if he doesn't buy one. He's only 34 so I doubt it's a mid-life crisis type thing.

OP posts:
rabbleraiser · 05/05/2007 21:16

Crikey, lucie, if he likes doing 90 in a car, God help him!!

I wouldn't want my dh to get one. I lost my fiance to a motorbike accident many years ago .. he was only doing 40, fell off, and got run over by a car.

At least six kids I went to school with died within two years of leaving, and all on motorbikes.

You've a life expectancy on those things. Sooner or later, you'll come to harm.

hatwoman · 05/05/2007 21:12

a friend of my brothers had a horrific bike accident when a car went through a red light. they didn;t think he would ever walk again. fortunately he did - but it took, iirc, about 2 or 3 years. Unfortunately it wasn't bad enough to put my brother off. he carried on having stupidly fast bikes until about 7 years ago when he ended up going over the top of a car, had a windscreen wiper (which he's still got!) clean through his shoulder and his legs shattered. I would hate hate hate dh to have a bike. it doesn;t matter how responsible you are you are incredibly vulnerable. a crash at 30 or 40 in car and you might get away with minor inuries. on a bike - you're thrown in the air, over cars, onto the ground and you're in a whole lot of trouble. and if you go at high speed then you are doubly so.

kslatts · 05/05/2007 20:53

I think if your dh really wants a motorbike, it is his decision.

shagirl · 05/05/2007 20:46

Fraid I have to share your concerns, quite often my dh has said he'll get one to save money but I'd worry all the time, as you say it's not really him that's the problem but the others not seeing them

Original poster
luciemule · 05/05/2007 20:45

Good idea Chirpygirl - might suggest the direct access course thing. That'd be good and he'd have fun too. He loves track days!

OP posts:
littlemissbossy · 05/05/2007 20:42

I understand your concerns but
I would love a motorbike

Original poster
luciemule · 05/05/2007 20:42

Hmm - thank you. I know it seems as though I'm being selfish but I just want him to be as safe as possible and for the kids to have a father for a long a time as possibvle! He does have a full bike license but did it through the forces about 5 years ago now and hasn't been on a bike since, although he says he wouldn't undertake, would crawl along slowly in queues and not buy a bike with a too big engine!

OP posts:
MrsWho · 05/05/2007 20:42

I would have said go for it but on his driving/speeding I would have said its quite risky doing that on a bike.So YANBU

Chirpygirl · 05/05/2007 20:41

DH has a bike, and I am worried for the exact reason you are, I know he will be careful but it's other people you have to worry about.

This is why when he got his licence I bought him a direct access course at a racetrack, it meant he leanrt to ride at speed safely and then was taken on the road while he had better control of the bike, some courses they only learn at 30 or 40 miles an hour which is not realistic.

I think if you insist he doesn't get a bike you may well end up being resented as belgo says, but you are within your rights to insist he learns properly and gets a less powerful bike to start with.

And if he does ALWAYS make him wear full safety gear, as in helmet, gloves, boots, jacket AND armoured trousers!

MrsJamesMartin · 05/05/2007 20:36

Does he have a full bike licence? My DH has a bike but its currently off road, I personally don't like them and think they are v dangerous but he loves it, he takes the risk I guess but if I had my way , i'd sell it in a flash!!

belgo · 05/05/2007 20:36

I understand your concerns, but I don't think it's your right to stop him buying one. He might end up resenting you.
Sorry!

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