How do people feel if the man you are with is looking at other women ?

I've got no problem with him looking just as I wouldn't expect him to have a problem with me looking. Occasionally I'll notice someone catch his eye (where we are there are a phenomenal amount of joggers with impossibly pert bottoms which defy gravity when running), I might comment (as in compliment it/be in awe) when I see something like that has caught his eye. It is human nature to look at other humans, especially attractive ones.

However following someone back in to the supermarket or leering or ogling is totally different. There is a line which you don't cross because it goes from noticing an attractive person (normal) to being a creepy weirdo (your husband). He maybe needs to work out where the line is? Also know it is OK to look but don't be a weirdo about it!

Creepy as fuck.

I'm sure people do look and find other attractive. I cannot recall my husband openly doing it. BUT doubling back to have a further perv is just creepy, rude and disrespectful to you and the women he is perving on.

I think that is one of the few times irl I would pull this face

Luckily for Dh I don't often have to pull that face at him.

I think it's normal to sometimes notice someone is attractive and look up, for men and women, but the turning back and making up excuses to get a second look is creepy and weird.

My (admittedly abusive) ex would check out other much younger women (late teens/early 20s. It made me feel lousy and I am a fair bit younger than him. But that I think was part of a bigger strategy to make destroy my self worth.

I’ve never noticed my current partner check out other women so either he hides it well or he simply doesn’t do it. As he’s given me no reason not to trust him I prefer to believe he doesn’t do it at all.

I'd think if he was openly ogling like he does (back tracking for another look? Ffs!) that he was a twat and the woman with him should raise her standards dump the twat.

Sorry, that sounded dismissive and flippant. I know it's not simple, but it is possible if he thinks he is doing nothing wrong. If he is willing to up his game, that's a different story.

Why doesn't it bother me? Because there's nothing wrong in appreciating an attractive person and I trust him not to act on it

You'd be ok with your partner/husband back-tracking down the supermarket aisle for a closer look?

Because pretty much everyone on this thread has said basic looking doesn't bother them either.

I agree with everyone who says he sounds creepy. Doubling back to have a closer look is crossing the line.

Just ask your partner to be more discrete or to wait until they are not with you before enjoying the 'scenery'.

Human being are not scenery. Or 'scenery'.

Not bothered at all. In fact, I'll point out people to him that I know he'd be attracted to.

Why doesn't it bother me? Because there's nothing wrong in appreciating an attractive person and I trust him not to act on it. If he did, he knows exactly what he'd be losing.

DH does this, but also will point out good looking men so I'm not sure what I think on the subject, I think going back down a shopping aisle to stare at a woman is creepy but a quick look is normal

What your DP is doing sounds quite creepy and definitely beyond what I would consider normal or acceptable.

How do you deal with it? You dump his sorry arse.

He back tracks down supermarket aisles and roads to get a better gawk at women?!

That's actually so embarrassing and cringeworthy. For him. And you.

I have no doubt that DH has walked past attractive women in my company and appreciated the view. Because I have myself from time-to-time. That's normal.

But actually going back to take another look puts him into the category of uncontrollable rutting Jack Russell, or hormonal, sex-obsessed adolescent.

Which of those would he prefer to be likened to?

I think everyone looks at someone stage. I notice attractive men and women not in an oggle way. But I a there attractive way.

Depends on how he's doing it for me. But not my relationship you can feel how you like.

Our approach is just to be open about it. Sometimes DH will say to me 'She's cute' and sometimes I'll even say 'There's a girl over there you'd probably fancy'. I guess the important thing is that this is sometimes and not constant. I can totally accept a guy thinking other women are cute, but I wouldn't like it being mentioned constantly or him furtively looking all the time, or indeed handling it in a way that is humiliating or aimed at provoking to me.

But it's one of those things where everyone has different standards as to what is acceptable.

Oh OP, that sounds awful.
It's totally normal to glance at people you find attractive, I do, and I know my partner does too. That's only human.
With his behaviour, your partner is being very disrespectful to both you and the women he's gawking at.

I ask him if he knows her as he’s looking at her like he does and he smirks and then we laugh about it.

I don’t care.

All men don’t do what you are describing in your OP.

Following a woman down a supermarket aisle to look at her is weird and creepy.

DP done this when we were first together, his Dad and DB are the same, had to remark on every woman on the tv music channels. Openly check out other women on a night out.

I found it very disrespectful, at first I was wondering if it was my own insecurity. It wasn't it was sleazy, He stopped shortly after I refused to put up with it, definitely learnt behaviour and his upbringing.

Everyone has a little peak and that's fine, what you describe is sleazy but can be changed. Play him at his game see how he likes it.

You dont stop finding people attractive just because you are in a relationship. Just ask your partner to be more discrete or to wait until they are not with you before enjoying the 'scenery'.

Honestly that sounds awful, I'd be really annoyed if my DH actually followed a woman down a shopping aisle for a better look, your DP sounds a bit creepy :/

My DH might have a quick glance if a really good looking woman walks by (as would I probably if there was a really fit guy), I'm not bothered by that. But he would never fix a stare or rubber neck (as I wouldn't) It is disrespectful to your partner.

I remember once being on a tube train and some guy was staring at me blatanty in front of his wife/girlfriend. I could tell she was upset. I was raging on her behalf but was too young and not enough self confidence to say anything.

Cheeseandonionicecream has a fantastic solution!!do it op!!

I felt like shit, and like dumping him. So I did.
I now have a man who sees women as actual humans, not just a side show.
You too can do this op.