How do people feel if the man you are with is looking at other women ?

My ex used to do it openly and then ridicule me and humiliate me when i objected.

My DH does not do it. He notices other men do it and finds it sleazy. I am very grateful for this.

I think it's totally normal to notice attractive people, and I am way worse for it than my husband is. Apparently I have a special smile I do when I see a hot guy and he ALWAYS notices. It happens automatically.

It wouldn't bother me if he checked another woman out briefly, but going back to eye them up or turning round to ogle them - nah. That's too much.

My husband will usually only glance at an attractive woman as she is walking towards us, and will never turn around to stare after her. Once, he did a double take after spotting a woman and looked at her again. I teased him about it, and he told me he was checking out her expensive/limited edition watch. It might have been true as she had her back to us. But she was also in a tight juicy couture tracksuit which looked rather good on her so the jury is still out on that one.
I would be massively annoyed if he trailed after a random woman in a supermarket just for a closer look.

Angeles, I find you attitude utterly disturbing.

Argeles, your post is really uncomfortable reading.

Your DP just isn’t very good at it. Many of us manage without getting caught. Sunglasses make it much easier.

argeles your attitude is really woman-hating.

Two of my friends husbands openly discuss which other mums at the school they fancy commenting on hair, figure etc. Their wives look on and smile. DH and I find this behaviour weird and unsettling. We notice attractive people but we’d never loudly exclaim that we fancy the new mum who’s just moved in and looks like an ex model etc etc, we both think it’s pretty disrespectful.

Literally following a woman to objectively stare at her to get his jollies borders on sexual harassment

I'll be honest I wouldn't like it. I don't like the thought that my dp could find other women better looking than me. If he does he off his pop with her.
I'm a jealous bitch. I ll hold my hands up

My boyfriend occasionally glances at other women and it makes me feel a bit shit about myself. I'm very very insecure about my appearance though so just try to ignore it as I think my reaction is disproportionate. I think that I would definitely leave him if he was doing the sort of thing that the OP describes though as that is just not on and massively disrespectful, not to mention really quite grubby.

Sorry OP, you deserve better than this.

It's never happened.

My husband wouldn't do it. Well, he may well do, but he has enough respect to be subtle enough so I have never noticed.

I wouldn't tolerate it either OP.

Doubling back in a supermarket aisle?

That would be weird and utterly creepy in someone single, never mind someone in a relationship.

This one is too strange to date, OP. Really.

I'm sorry that your experience of men has suggested this is within the bounds of normal behaviour. It really isn't. On the plus side, you're posting here because the behaviour disturbs you. now you need to start listening to yourself a bit more - and finding someone who doesn't set your alarm bells off.

It’s incredibly hurtful and disrespectful.

Whilst I totally detest it whenever my DH looks at other women, and it infuriates me, it makes me want to batter the shit out of the woman rather than my DH! I have no idea why this is the case, as it’s my DH who does the looking, but it’s always the woman who I want to call all the names under the sun whilst physically attacking her.

It’s strange too, as when I was younger, so many men would very openly check me out and flirt with me in front of their partners, so I know what it’s like from the other perspective too.

If ever I have talked with friends about what would we do if we caught our DH’s/partners with another woman, we nearly all say that we’d do everything in our power to kill the woman, and only say that we’d shout at and slap our men.

Since becoming a Mum, I no longer think exactly the same as above, not because I wouldn’t want to, but as I love my DD more than anything else in the world, and wouldn’t want to be stuck in a prison cell and miss her growing up!

We both look discreetly at attractive people. As long as no one notices including the attractive person and the OH it's ok. It doesn't mean we love each other less, it's just having a shallow look for fun.

Men who visible ogle women, especially doing things like going back into an aisle to get a second look are gross. End of. Can you get rid?

I have never thought about it or noticed my partner doing it. He probably looks at women thinking they are attractive but not in a pervy, checking out their butt kind of way. I probably look at people occasionally if they are attractive.

What you describe would bother me as it seems a bit over the top.

Please do stand your ground. Repeatedly. And call him out on it whenever he does it. Loudly. He might eventually get the message that it's not really something decent ppl should be doing - out of basic human respect for both their dp and the poor random stranger.

What a repulsive man.

All creepy men do this

I think it's normal to sometimes notice someone is attractive and look up, for men and women, but the turning back and making up excuses to get a second look is creepy and weird.
This ^. Fine to notice (in a casual way without making a big deal over it), even to look back over your shoulder sometimes, but to make excuses about looking at buildings or go back to follow them - disrespectful & creepy.

How very disrespectful of him to to you Op. Also, how creepy he must appear to the women he is ogling. Yuck. I wouldn’t be putting up with that shit, and you don’t have to either. Dump the creepy git.

I wouldn’t go out more than once with someone who behaved to disrespectfully.
If he’s sleazebagging like this in your company what’s the chances he’s a bum-pinching cat-caller when he’s alone. Twat.