to expect DP not to whinge when I spend money on clothes for the kids?

Gosh - anyone would think there was a difference in the sexes with statistics like that!

Always have been more baby boys than girls like that as more die and get diseases and die in war but it's becoming skewed in India and China with real problems there.

But the live birthrate globally is something like 52% male and 48% female is it not?

I will become indifferent when just over 50% of leaders worldwide are women and that % has remained so for about 200 years. Until then I would always want the women in.

Eleusis - I think I am indifferent to whether a presidential candidate is male or female, I just want the best person for the job, though of course if that best person happens to be a woman - fantastic.

Yes, Sarkozy is expected to win, and I hope that he will win by a large margin so that Royal will be ejected from national politics and can go back to regional where she (at best) belongs (my partner, who runs a chain of shops, says that there is no way he would employ her to run even one store (turnover EUR 3 million...)).

I must admit I don't know a lot about either of them. I'm all for a woman president (of any country). But, I do agree that a bad one is very damaging to women in general.

I think Sarkozy is expected to win. Is this right?

Eleusis - fortunately I don't have a vote in France...

But, given the appalling choice, yes, I would prefer a Sarkozy presidency to a Royal one any day. She is grossly incompetent in every way and a great harm to women. He is more economically literate.

So, Anna, does this mean you are for Sarkozy?

Remember Julezboo never ever email your dh to tell him what you are doing, especially if it means spending money. Just do it!

Losing her temper was not the stupidest thing she did in that (so-called) debate. And she is far too bourgeoise to be a true socialist - she is more of a self-styled fairy godmother bestowing favours upon the downtrodden.

If she weren't so pretty she's never have got anywhere near the presidency. Though I totally agree that it would be better if British politicians looked nicer.

twenty, I think that's true which is why allowing people to choose the sex rather than allowing them to abort the sex they don't want may be preferable although I suppose most can't afford IVF and IVF has risks, whereas cheap scan plus abortion following on is more affordable. Some farmers in China now have to share.

SR can't be a proper socialist then. in real communism there is not assumption women will care for under 5s any more than men. I didn't watch it but heard she lost her temper which is the most stupid thing anyone can do whether male or female on TV or indeed in meetings. But compare here to most standard issue British politicans who are hard pressed to force their massive thighs on to plane seats - Gordon Brown, Prescott etc. It's not a pretty sight.

Xenia - don't suppose you watched the Ségo-Sarko debate on French TV the other night? You would have gone crazy with their sexist comments - Sarko talking about childcare and how his priority was for all women to have accessible childcare to allow them to work, how he was going to provide after school homework clubs because women now worked and weren't available to do homework with their children, Ségo talking about how women needed shorter working hours because their day was so tiring etc etc

My dh loves shopping for clothes and I'm the one who loves book shops! everyones different aren't they.
Cor I'd hate to have to go to work though! I haven't got time!

Heard an interview on the radio where the expert was saying that in Western Countries gender selection favoured girls. So it's not just those people with brown skin that choose the gender Xenia. Though whether it is murder in this case does depend on your beliefs.

Oh Xenia, you do cheer me up

If I left the OH to buy the clothes for dd, we would either end up in the monsoon party dress situation as described, or she would be running around barefoot in a potato sack... if I didn't buy clothes for the OH, he would be walking around in a pair of skanky jogging bots and a paint-stained t-shirt with holes in it...

Still tittering at the idea of OH doing clothes shopping - I can picture the look of frozen terror on his face as he enters the shop, grabbing out blindly at the first item he comes to, running to the till, throwing money at them and running out again to the safety of the nearest bookshop...

RS, I live in a very mixed community here in London where boys are hugely prized. The local hospitals would never tell the sex on scans otherwise girls will be aborted wholesale by the local communities here.

If a culture and dynamic is girls are an expense and don't work (and don't like many UK housewives these days even) then girls will not be as much appreciated. Another reason to add to my list of why women in the UK should work.

You could ebay the games and console & spend the money on clothes!
Really though, you could sell the clothes your baby has outgrown and use the money towards new ones, a lot of us do this to help keep the cost down.

Xenia It is horrendous that little baby girls are killed for being a girl. It's hard to understand what could make someone do that to their child.How sad, desperate and tragic for them to be so low.

The fact that I just had a baby boy was particularly good news to the family in Pakistan though. And my mil is the worst culprit for that attitude. And everyone wants to please her by having baby boys!

I am privaledged because I have the choice to go out to work or not. And that is the point. Ideally everyone should have that choice.

Because of the culture dh grew up in he might whinge if money is wasted but he wants and expects to provide for his family and extended family and that's what drives him.

It's the last sentence I have problems with and the fact India and China murder so many girl babies every year because women are so badly regarded sadly in those countries - I know that's not pakistan of course which has had a female leader, example to the world actually. let there be many more. Women as provider or men and women as joint providers for the family is a nice dynamic many couples finds works better than man as provider and woman as recipient which is a bit Victorian really.

Hi,

I dont think you are being unreasonable, you have a right to want to buy nice/new things for your baby and your self. If my partner went out and spent £90 on games I'd rip his head off. for one He isn't going to play them all at once. Two he probably could have got cheaper ones from the second hand section Three. maybe he should be spending more time with his family than being glued to a games console (sorry its a bit of a presumption) If i were you i'd trade all his games in and tell him to get off his high horse

Myself and my DH put all out money together ane we make sure all the important stuff is paid for e.g. bills, food etc. then baby has enough nappies, medicine etc. then whatever money we have left we divid it into 3, some for me some for him and some for our savings, even if we just get £5 pound out of it at least we are comforted in the fact the we know everything is payed for and we have a little spending money for ourselves. if one or the other of us wants something a little out of our price range we can always go into the savings or save up for it.

Ness

Xenia the man was the one being subservient in the situation. His sister is very clever, she is not put down by anyone. She knows where to go to get good value and good quality things. She won't let the salesmen get the better of her. But the whole shopping thing is important and life, buzzing wonderful life.
Sil has 4 children, 3 boys and a girl...the girl is as well educated as her brothers and studying electronics.

Dh enjoys being the provider...he has been trained by his mother to do so and I enjoy being provided for, I've been trained by my father to do so

Well I went and got DS1 2 pairs of new summer shoes today and 3 pairs of shorts {he is off to spain for 4 days}

I did not need to ask DH1 or new DP if I could and their is no way either of them would say a word about it.

Mainly because men make wars, and therefore are more interested in them I would think......

RL, ah that just sums up what I regard as morally wrong and bda for women - womn choose fripperies and a man who keeps them in subservience pays. Let us hope that vanishes from the planet as a dynamic and instead women pay for their own stuff and earn their own money.

Alice M was writing about the fact she'd look at one copy of the Guardian and every single article over 12 pages was written by men about men about wars men fight, political issues men deal with, court cases where the barristers were men, judge male, defendant male. Only female picture at all was one MI5 person or something. She wasn't really saying why is mumsnet about washing powder. She was probably saying why were 100% of those guardian writers male and 100% of the issues just things involving men and why isn't it more 50%.