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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To object to my friend sticking her finger in DSs mouth??

57 replies

Wilkie · 12/04/2007 22:30

I know it sounds daft but I really don't like it. She is my BF and has a LO 2 weeks younger than mine who is 13 weeks old. Her LO likes to suck her finger rather than a dummy, mine has a dummy and I REALLY object to her sticking her bloody finger in my DSs mouth when he is crying. Why can't she put his dummy in???

She is lovely and I really don't know how to ask her not to do it. Went round the other day and her bloody DH did it too!!!! Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

OP posts:
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pansypants · 13/04/2007 13:29

Wilkie,
buy one of those soother holders from boots,pin it too los clothes,so no excuses about not finding the dummy......

Original poster
Wilkie · 13/04/2007 12:07

Thank for all the responses - at least I know I'm not a freak.

She is a fab mother but I think there are boundaries with other people's kids and you should ask before doing certain things, this being one of them.

OP posts:
chocolateface · 13/04/2007 11:22

I used to stick my own finger in DS1's mouth but hated any one else doing it. You'll have to say something......and be firm! (I used to grab my baby back!)

Tutter · 13/04/2007 11:20

haven't read thread

but agree it's a very intimate thing to do

i visited a friend and her newborn recently and she suggested i do it as her dd finds it comforting and she didn't mind (and i'd just washed my hands!) but otherwise i would never dream of it

and would not have liked it if anyone did so with ds

dejags · 13/04/2007 11:10

I was all set to type a response along the lines of "you are totally over-reacting wilkie".

Having considered it though, I think I would definitely be put-out by this.

I would tactfully say something. But that's just me.

Trinityrhino · 13/04/2007 11:09

that would be shouldn't give her my finger to suck at all....

Trinityrhino · 13/04/2007 11:07

I didn't want to give my dd2 a dummy and in the small period between her finding her thumb (could see she was try) and not being quite able to I would suck my finger clean and let her suck my little finger to go to sleep of a night. she very quickly found her thumb and I didn't have to anymore.
A HV told me I shouldn't do it because there were more germs in my mouth than anywhere and I shouldn't clean my finger with my mouth before putting it in hers and that I should give her my finger to sock at all. I took no notice of her and carried on.HOWEVER this was my choice with my child.
I would never do it with someone elses child EVER, she should make more of an effort to find the dummy.

deepinlaundry · 13/04/2007 10:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

deepinlaundry · 13/04/2007 10:56

This reply has been deleted

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3andnomore · 12/04/2007 23:35

lol....
another point...you don't always know what peoples after loo habits are....
considering how long you actually ahve to wash your hands under pretty hot water, and all that...

hatrick · 12/04/2007 23:26

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fingerwoman · 12/04/2007 23:24

i probably shouldn't mention that I've changed ds's nappy on the floor of a public toilet then.
or that he once crawled round one while I was on the loo and started chewing a pipe under the sink.

he's fit as a fiddle though, and it's all because I let him eat the floor

3andnomore · 12/04/2007 23:22

hm...hatrick..I wish I could trust that...however, often you are (luckily) not aware what is on your hands...germs are clever lil things, really...
I mean, that friend could have a handbag, and she might put's it down in public loo cubicles and touches it then when picking it up and maybe even put it on tables, and germs spread...germs you never knew there were!
NOw, before you call the people from the lunatic assylum..I am very aware that the human body is more then capable of fending off nasties...well..often anyway But lil ones immunesystem isn't quite as develloped as ours...

fingerwoman · 12/04/2007 23:21
Grin
hatrick · 12/04/2007 23:20

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Aloha · 12/04/2007 23:19

Ah, another thing to be insouciant about!

3andnomore · 12/04/2007 23:19

as for teh sterilising issue...rtkangamum ( I htink that is her id) used to bump a sterilising tthread up, which mentions that microbiologist now feel sterilising is unecessary, even in prem Baby's...

hunkermunker · 12/04/2007 23:18

Teach him to bite. No problem then

hatrick · 12/04/2007 23:18

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fingerwoman · 12/04/2007 23:17

i'll stick a cadburys chocolate finger in next time

3andnomore · 12/04/2007 23:17

Just reading a few more messages...now oddly enough, I wouldn't be weirded out by someone else bf'ing any of my Kids, well, when they were still breastfed, lol...as long as I know and trust that person!

hatrick · 12/04/2007 23:16

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3andnomore · 12/04/2007 23:15

urgh...that would be something I don't like neither...you just don't know where those fingers were...!
I think it's slightly different if it is the aprent...i.e. they are germs they are used too, lol...but someone elses...hm!
I mean, once they crawl and whatnot, then well, they gonna get used to all sorts...but until then...I don't know, jsut wouldn't like that neither!

fingerwoman · 12/04/2007 23:14

yup, have seen those teeth though so won't do it again.

misdee · 12/04/2007 23:14

i am totally about this. all my dd's loved to suck fingers, dont have a probl;em, with it myself.

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